to wonder what some people are doing on an internet forum when they're not remotely interested in having an honest discussion about anything?

[Lottapianos]

I keep reading the following or similar....

'Get a life'
'Get a grip'
'Well if that's all you have to worry about.....'
'You can always switch over/don't have to watch it'
And my personal anti-favourite:
'You're overthinking it'

I'm not perfect - I sometimes start reading a thread and then decide I can't be arsed any more so I move on and don't leave a comment. I don't decide to tear the poster to shreds on my way out though.

Why on earth do people make these ridiculous, fatuous, completely unhelpful comments? They are just more or less polite ways of saying 'shut up and stop feeling what you're feeling'. Just because you have no empathy and can't wrap your brain around someone else's point of view doesnt mean that they are wrong and have no right to feel how they do. By all means disagree but do it honestly and put some effort into the discussion instead of just brushing people aside.

OK, that was therapeutic. Thank you for reading

My biggest bug bear is "first world problem". Yes it is, because I should imagine most of us posting on mn are living in the first world. Not every problem has to be life or death to make it worthy of concern!

Quite right ilovechips. Those 'first world problem' people should knock themselves out starting their own threads about Big Important Things and leave the rest of us trifling little poppets to it

I once started a thread which was quite lighthearted about my neighbour wanting to know a recipe.
I was told I was pettier than Tom Petty. I found this an excellent response. It was almost a pun and Tom Petty isn't petty at all (afaik).
However, when I had sobered up, I realised it was only a thinly veiled variant of "fuck off and stop posting boring shit" . So that was me told.....

Yeah, that's because you don't know how it feels to be me, cailinsalach

Peaece and love

I do think 'get a grip' (not phrased like that!) has a place sometimes.

Not so much the rest.

I think sometimes you can see someone is snapping because they're having a truly horrible day, or the thread brought up a bad memory for them, or whatever. I think that's part of what makes MN into a proper community though. Like, I was on a thread today where I wandered ready to be irritated about something I took to be trivial. And then I realized I'd got it wrong and for lots of people posting, it was a really upsetting topic. That's going to happen. We're going to get across each other sometimes.

I used to go on a forum where, if you once lost your temper, or decided to be a monumental wanker because you were in a foul mood (I have extensive personal experience of this), you'd never be forgiven. In fact you'd have to do a hundred Hail Marys and provide notarized evidence of one month's worth of anodyne supportive 'lol you're lovely hun' posts before anyone would speak to you again.

That is really dull, to me. I love that we can all be normal adults who sometimes react in a personal way or get fed up.

I agree. I do wonder at the 'if that's all you have to worry about..' comments.

It's usually just someone asking a simple thing or making a comment. Who gets to decide what is/isn't important anyway?

I think there are some people who are on here all day every day and they run out of intelligent things to say eventually.

Olivia, if you have extra e's you should share them.

God knows I'm on here all day, and god knows I never had intelligent things to say, so ...

But surely it's easy to tell who's being rude on purpose and who isn't?

Of course it's easy you big smelly arse hat.

See?

I never run short of intelligent things to say. But maybe that's just me

Just you.

And honey

And everlong

But mainly just you. biatch

Russky you always have interesting things to say.

I think "You are overthinking this" is appropriate in some cases. Where the OP is along the lines of "My best friend said 'Good morning' to me today, when normally she'd have said 'Hello'. Do you think this means that she's offended by something I did six months ago with this long and complicated back-story, or perhaps she secretly fancies my DH. Or maybe she thinks that I secretly fancy her DH, though I can't imagine why, although there was this one incident at a party... Now I don't know what to do. Should I text her and ask why she didn't say 'Hello' or should I go round to her house to talk about it face to face?"

I'm sure that's true, but it just makes it more of a pity what I post is largely bollocks.

(But seriously ... someone basically pleasant and decent getting stroppy once in a while is normal. It's horrible being on sites where you're not allowed to snap and then go back the next day saying 'sorry, I was an arse', isn't it?)

I haven't read all the thread but FFS you really are overthinking this. First world problem isn't in it if seriously, that's all you've got to worry about. Meh. I'd really consider getting over yourself. Go to the grip shop and buy one and when you've paid for it, fuck off to the far side of fuck and upon getting there, fuck off some more.

Did I get them all in?? Did I??

I know when my children were very young I got incensed about everything from child parking spaces, availability of the two child trolley, positioning of fire escapes, Bacardi discontinuing the lime breezer

I was vastly over thinking things, I had lost the plot completely and I did "need to get out more"

Forums are about differing opinions, it would be very dull if we all came on and agreed. Unfortunately the nature of the written word, rather than spoken it comments can sometimes come across as sharp when perhaps the intention behind them is slightly humorous.

Surely a lot of the "get a grip" type comments are humorous? Many of the LTB one are, aren't they?

Ok ... now I am going to hope I'm overthinking it because I can't tell if you mean me.

If I come across that way, I'm sorry. I honestly don't mean to be.

I often want to type CATCH YOURSELF ON, that's my version of get a grip. I always refrain though cos that's just unkind.