to read "misery lit"

[shewhowines]

Is that the correct term for it?

I have just finished reading a book, about someone who suffered childhood abuse, that somebody passed on to me. I know there is a hatred of such books by many people.

Whilst it would not be my first choice of book, I must admit that I "enjoyed" it. It made me sad and I did actually have tears in my eyes at one point.
Reasons I have occassionally read them/watched sad films.

1. It is important that people are aware that this sort of thing went on/goes on.
2. It is important that people have some ability to empathise (although I know you obviously can't really understand unless you have gone through it yourself).
3. I get a positive emotion from it, in that I feel grateful for the life that I have led and feel very lucky. There for the grace of God goes I...

I am prepared to get a flaming for this, But I am genuinely interested in why it is supposed to be so popular, and what other people think of it.

No, not if you don't care.

But it is the fact that some people find them (insert appropriate word for not reading in the right spirit) that I don't like.

Hully can you see that by using the words "pure" and "wholesome" yoare perpetuating the idea that there is something "impure" and "unwholesome" about abuse survivors?

No. Unwholesome applies to the reader with questionable motive. Pure applied to the motive of the genuine survivor to separate that person from the person churning out made up stuff to make money.

I can see you are very upset. As I said up there, I can't think of a way to say what I think any more clear. Please stop thinking I think survivors are tainted and should shut up!!

YABU. I actually picked up one of those books in a charity shop last week, and the few paragraphs I skimmed were nothing but hideously lurid over descriptions of some really quite unbelievably vile sounding abuse. Bleurgh.

Just utter trash written by people who need attention from morons who want cheap, nasty thrills.

This is my last attempt:

I DO NOT QUESTION THE SURVIVOR

I QUESTION CERTAIN OF THE READERS AND THE INDUSTRY

Cailin I don't think anyone here would say the survivors are impure or unwholesome! That is against the very spirit of what is being said. The word 'survivors' belies that surely, and the fact that MN as a whole hates any victim blaming. Please don't feel bullied or attacked.

It's those that are reading these books for 'pleasure' that some of us do not understand, and also the sheer quantity of the memoirs of this genre available.

And also what Hully said.

And indeed we have been on enough threads together for you to know me better than this, Cailin.

Spotty I am not going to give you chapter and verse on my job. What on earth has that got to do with the views I have expressed? Either address those views or don't but trying to harangue posters by following up every answer they give you with another question smacks of trying to divert from the main argument.

Well, SaucyJack's comments are enough to make me leave this thread.

Cailin - you have helped so many people on this site. The thread you started last year was incredible and lives were turned round because of that. You are an amazing person.

Basically hully my story is my story. It happened to me and nothing will change that. If i wrote a book about it it would be because i want to tell my story, like anybody else. Just because my story includes abuse i don't want to be treated like a special topic that only people with pure and wholesome motives can read about. I'm a person with a life story like anyone else, i want to be able to tell that story without having to hide details for fear of who might read it.

Hully i don't think badly of you at all, you know how much i like you. I'm not upset , i'm just trying to put my point across.

And that is completely fair.

I meant your first post.

Oh and thanks spotty

But this is the whole issue with 'misery lit' Cailin. You might want to tell your story, but I can't imagine anyone who wanted to hear it would be those you wanted to listen.

I'm sure there is a sensitive and respectful way to both read and write about the issue, but these books ain't it.

I just read an interesting article on the rise of the genre by Esther Addley in the Guardian

The implication being, saucy, that only twisted people could possibly want to read about my life, that normal "good" people wouldn't touch it. That makes me feel great.

It was online, not today's paper.

'Just because my story includes abuse i don't want to be treated like a special topic that only people with pure and wholesome motives can read about.'

They are treated as a separate topic. They're not put with the autobiographies. Brian Keenan's book didn't get packaged as a genre piece so that he was defined by his suffering.

There is something unpleasant, ghoulish and, yes, unwholesome in someone choosing to read the details of other people's horrible experiences as entertainment. If there was a torture section and someone spent their time reading books about people's pain and suffering I would find it just as odd. I feel the same about people who read 'real crime' books.

I don't like to think of children who keep seeing these books around and thinking of adults reading about the abuse of children for their own titillation.

I really object to the word "titillation." why is a book about war or murder entertaining while a book about abuse is "titillating"? Any research on the genre suggests that these books are mainly read by survivors. I doubt they get' much "titillation" from them. There's no evidence that they are favoured by paedophiles.

According to the article I've just read, there is indeed a concern that paedophiles read them, especially paedophiles that were themselves abused as children.

Apparently the biggest readership is those that read them to feel better about their own lives.

This style of literature is a passing fashion. I still don't think abuse should be a fashion and for titilation and the 'urgh' factor which the publishers have turned it into as it makes them money. That's why people question the readers who love reading this. Also the fact that people now realise or suspect that at least some will be made up or embellished detracts from thoses who are genuine. When the fashion passes the publishers will move on to another fashion, all they care about is the money.

No- one is critising or trying to deny a voice to those who have been abused.

I don't think books about war and murder are entertaining.