AIBU to expect other grown ups not to continually let Dow my little ones?

[Ghanagirl]

My twins age 6 are the youngest kids in extended family, I have two sisters and my DH has 2 sisters plus a brother they never help out with kids, fair enough they are not obligated despite hours of first class baby sitting expensive treats from us when we were childless.
But what really upsets me is when we make arrangements for them to spend time with older cousins ( usually at ours or my mums) they often pull out at last minute leaving me to explain to my two that no they won't be seeing so and so

How much older are they? Little kids might cramp their style

That's not really ok, but how old are they. If teens they probably have constantly changing plans or just aren't that interested.

Otherwise it's their parents who as they are adults you should be able to discuss this with.

Cousins range in age from 9 to 16 I realise that little ones might cramp style but if they or parents make arrangements think they should honor them, I would expect my two to do the same when they are older,

You think that now when they are age 6 but i am willing to bet things will change as they get older. In particular if teens get a better offer there is little you can do to stop them, especially if the planned meeting is not a special occasion thing (birthday, christmas etc). Better to let them go off than force them along to have them all moody and moany and probably ignoring the younger children anyway.

I'm the oldest of the grandchildren on both sides and luckily I love kids so was always happy to see my cousins but my two younger brothers were a different story! They were never interested in our little cousins climbing all over them and wanting to play so they'd get frustrated and the younger kids would get upset. Families, eh?! My brothers are 16 and 18 now and thankfully much more accepting!

I agree with whoever said you should get your kids excited in advance. Parents' attitudes change as their kids get older - my mum was brilliant and enthusiastic with us when we were little but now that we're grown up she's not especially bothered about the younger members of our family whereas my uncle thinks everyone should be madly in love with their five dribbling darlings of various ages under seven ;)