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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ok, so I was 'unreasonable', but wtaf?

51 replies

KirjavaTheCat · 27/06/2013 16:21

On the way back from town with my 3yo, we came to a wide double pelican crossing. Both crossings were green so we crossed, came to the middle island and prepared to cross again. Just as we'd stepped foot onto the road the green man disappeared. As we'd started walking across the road, I thought we may as well carry on (the part that makes me unreasonable), so we did.

Anyway, half way across the road, the woman in the car waiting to go, beeped at us, frightening DS causing him to drop his apple and scream. We finally made it to the other side (after I basically had to drag DS across the road because he wanted to retrieve his apple.)

The woman in the car, instead of driving off, revved her engine while she shouted at me and DS, calling me a 'dozy fucking cunt' telling me to 'fuck off' and 'look where I am fucking going'. Then sped off with her three children in the back (school run rage?)

I'm feeling annoyed and shaky. Never been shouted at like that by a complete stranger before. Was she justified? I don't drive, but I can't honestly say I'd feel like screaming and swearing at someone in front of their child because they crossed when the light changed.

OP posts:
Yama · 27/06/2013 16:56

I wonder if she's ever nipped through a light when it has just changed to red. I see this increasingly with drivers. The attitude that pedestrians have less rights and are merely an inconvenince that they have to endure.

I hate this attitude.

YANBU She is a prick.

jacks365 · 27/06/2013 16:56

You were in the right to continue crossing the driver needs to learn how crossings work properly just like all those who drive over zebra crossings with someone still on it do.

Yama · 27/06/2013 16:57

And what she did was a Breach of the Peace and she could be charged.

MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik · 27/06/2013 17:01

She was being a total wanker.

Yes, you should have stopped, yes, if I'd been driving and I'd already been in a foul mood I'd have muttered to myself, cos, you know, I am petty and dull.

What she did makes me strongly suspect she shouldn't be on the road.

minibmw2010 · 27/06/2013 17:37

She was very unreasonable but you said you'd only just stepped out. That's not 'already crossing', that's practically still. You should have gone back.

needaholidaynow · 27/06/2013 17:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
KirjavaTheCat · 27/06/2013 17:43

Yes indeed, mini, which is why I said I was unreasonable. Could have stepped back without much fuss, but thought since she's not moving, and it's only just gone off, why not? But yeah I won't be doing it again. It was really horrible being shouted at like that :/

OP posts:
solarbright · 27/06/2013 17:45

Pedestrians have the right of way, and the green man had only just gone out. She's both a bad mother and a bad driver. You should have hiked your judgey pants right up high and sauntered off- slowly - while whistling. Or offered DS another apple.

phantomnamechanger · 27/06/2013 17:46

she was a nutter and YWNBU at all

You had right of way, plain and simple.
The lights for her would have been on amber not green, meaning proceed once pedestrains have stopped crossing

I pity her poor DC, really I do

Hope your LO is not too shaken by it all.

quesadilla · 27/06/2013 17:47

She was way out of order and would have been even if it was a red light. I don't suppose you got her reg plate? If you did I would report her to the police for harassment.

Emilythornesbff · 27/06/2013 19:41

You had the right of way
She was deranged
Poor you and DS.

Emilythornesbff · 27/06/2013 19:42

But, maybe she was scared that she might have had a near miss?
Maybe?

EleanorFarjeon · 27/06/2013 19:49

She sounds like a complete loon. I just don't get that level of aggression over something so trivial. Some people become deranged when in their cars.

Don't waste your energy thinking about her. She probably bursts blood vessels on a daily basis, silly cow.

raisah · 27/06/2013 19:57

What a bitch! I have had similar experiences loads of times in London and unfortunately by women 95% of the time.

One time I was crossing at a zebra crossing with my ds in a pram and I was almost run over by a woman in a car with twins in the back. She too wound down her window and shouted at me to get out of the way & that she wasnt going to stop.

Just awful behaviour and I hope you are both ok now.

ShadowStorm · 27/06/2013 20:26

I'm pretty sure that if you'd started crossing before the green man went out - even if you'd only just started crossing - then, as a pedestrian on a pedestrian crossing, you had right of way until you'd finished crossing.

But even if I'm wrong about that, she was completely out of order to be beeping her horn and shouting abuse at you.

attheendoftheday · 27/06/2013 20:27

Wow, what a total cow. Some people's meanness flabbergasts me.

tinkertitonk · 27/06/2013 20:32

She sounds insane. There is no way of winning with insane people, just thank your deity of the moment that you are sane.

quoteunquote · 27/06/2013 20:36

Shame you didn't get her number plate, the police love reminding these twonks how to behave,

if there is any Karma in this world she will try it on someone who's inner punk takes over at moments like these,

we enjoy re educating the twonks of the world,

Perfectly vile that she did it, totally unacceptable she did it to a child, next time phone 101 and report it immediately, even if you don't get the number plate, if you can describe the car, and location, if she drives past a police car in the next ten minutes, they can react.

Scary she thinks she can behave like this, she will do it somewhere one day and not get away with it, these people always meet their match, there is always a bigger fish.

everlong · 27/06/2013 20:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

siezethenight · 27/06/2013 21:58

Last week I was coming over the little bridge (single file traffic) and the tide was high, the road was flooded, I stopped at end of bridge to look and see if I could get over road or not - I could not so headed in direction of other road when man in a red Ka waiting there to get onto bridge wound his window down and screamed at me, 'Can you go any f*cking slower, bitch?' I had my window down so went, 'Peace and love man...' He went as red in the face as his Ka, I thought he might explode so I left the scene.... Dd laughed her head off.
Some people are total twats when they are in a car.
Perhaps he was this woman's husband!?

spangledboots · 27/06/2013 22:00

I don't understand people who talk like that in front of children. I get that she was frustrated at not being able to speed off once the light turned green but that is a bit much.

ouryve · 27/06/2013 22:01

It's rare that I get to say this about a woman, but she's a knob.

And I feel sorry for her children.

hwjm1945 · 27/06/2013 22:04

Oddly similar thing happened to me yesterday and I just gestured at the flashing amber and shouted,,,,,look at the flashing amber...I have right of way,,,,,and then worried bloke would follow me and duff me up!

Marcheline · 28/06/2013 10:37

Some people are wankers, ergo, some people who drive cars are also wankers.

So sorry that happened to you. is your DS ok today? If that was my DD, she would remember that for quite a while.

Yesterday I was driving v slowly down a windy country lane behind a bicycle. It wasn't safe to overtake as couldn't see if cars were coming around the bend in opposite direction. The car behind me honked, sped up and overtook me and the bicycle, narrowly avoiding a car coming around the bend in the opposite direction.

I understand being in a rush. I don't understand being abusive, risking your life, passengers lives or the lives of other road users.

Fakebook · 28/06/2013 10:42

Ywnbu! You had started crossing before the green man went off. What a cow for scaring a child like that. I would've stood infront of her car and made a few hand gestures before slowly walking off.