to worry that twenty two month old DD has started to bite (usually her own hand) and head bang when she's frustrated?

[fabergeegg]

Just that, really. She's also withdrawn around other children. Should I be concerned? And what should I do when she does it? Trying to placate her only encourages her.

Is she speaking yet?

She has about twenty little words, none very clear. On the whole she doesn't bother. Great comprehension.

If she's not able to express herself verbally yet, it's quite normal for her to be banging her head/biting herself in frustration.

It's just a phase, and the best thing to do is to make sure she's safe (ie. that she's not banging her head on anything hard) and to ignore.

She'll learn that doing things to herself won't get her attention, and also it sounds like she needs to be left alone to calm down herself, if when you try to calm her she gets more frustrated.

The only way I got my son to stop hitting his head off walls or biting himself was to try and stop him from getting to the point where he'd be so angry that he'd do it. Much harder than it sounds though!

Are there any other concerns like eye contact, pointing, repetitive play or toe walking?

I don't want to alarm you but my son has ASD and he used to do that at her age.
In your shoes I would try to get her assessed as soon as possible. It's not a nice thought but it's better to find out if there are any potential issues as early as possible.

Also trust your gut. I dismissed a lot of things because he was a boy/his cousin does the same/ his uncle spoke really late etc. I was wrong.
If you feel there is something not quite right, check it out.

She does still walk on her toes. And I suppose she points. And she loves repetitive games. Don't all toddlers? She makes a lot of eye contact but on her own terms. I love her to bits but she's very disobedient - probably my fault though.

ASD may run in both our families actually. This is frightening.

Don't panic! It's far more likely to be a phase but it's still worth exploring your options.

Thanks anonacfr. I don't want to bring it up with my GP and have it on her notes. How would I go about getting her checked?

I'm sure someone will be along shortly to tell you. My son has complex epilepsy of a type that is often linked with ASD so we were referred by his neurologist.
If found this link that might be useful- there is a confidential helpline number.

www.autism.org.uk/about-autism/all-about-diagnosis/diagnosis-the-process-for-children.aspx

Why wouldn't you want it on her notes?

I'm pretty sure the HV does a basic asd test at this age,the CHAT test. Contact your HV or just make an appointment with your GP and explain your concerns and ask for a referral to a paediatrician. I echo anon's post, I waited with my son as he was just set in his ways/his dad was a handful as a child/he just doesn't like the nursery children/etc, and I wish I had acted sooner. It's really probably nothing to worry about at all, but speaking to someone will reassure you, and on the small chance there is a problem then early intervention is important.

Why don't you want it written on her notes?

Faberge I understand your feelings about having things like this on her notes...but it won't follow her into school or anything...they don't check medical records unless there is good reason. If for instance a child DID have some difficulties then the school would know because the child would be having support from other agencies.

You can do the chat test here but Autism isn't the only thing to think about at all...your DD sounds like she's on track with her development though...does she eat well? Sleep ok? What about toileting? Does she poo regularly?

DS2 used to bang his head off the toilet bowl if he couldn't have his own way (we live in a bungalow). I would just walk away cos if the audience leaves the building the actors don't perform. He's a normal 10year old now

Thanks for this advice. Regarding why I wouldn't want it on her notes - because I don't trust doctors and social workers - not their agenda, their note keeping, their powers of reasoning - nothing! Skim read by someone else, my query could be interpreted as a much more serious concern, or it could be assumed that a professional had suggested it.

Seriously though- if you have any concerns it's worth having as many professionals on board as possible. You're more likely to be dismissed as a hysterical parent than the other way round.

My DS who has Aspergers would headbang as a toddler and his forehead was covered in bruises. A friend who worked for social services told me to go to the GP so it was in his notes. The reason being that if he had to go to casualty at any stage and they saw for example, bruises and a broken arm then I could prove that his head banging was causing the bruises and I could confirm I had sought medical advice about it before they leapt to any inaccurate conclusions.

My DD is 23 months and pulls her eye lids, slaps her face and scratches herself if I tell her off. She does it to get her own way rather than hurt herself. Don't panic, worth getting it checked out though.

ASD don't headband to hurt themselves- they do it for the sensory stimulation. They tend to have a high pain threshold- so they often bite/scratch/headbang quite violently.

If toddlers do it during tantrums/when they're being told off it's a different matter.
When they do it repeatedly and randomly, without any obvious social interaction it becomes more of a concern.
My son used to shake his head really violently, headbang and spin round and round until he fell over.

The chat test is great. My ds has asd and has never done any of what you describe. He would have failed the chat at 2 years old though, it's a pretty reliable indicator of communication issues.

Far better to get on to it early if there is anything to be concerned about.

Is there a baby signing class near you? It is possible that all of this could be due to frustration at not being able to communicate needs.

Not always but sometimes and worth exploring.