to expect a bit of sympathy from dh?

[WhistlingBay]

I am 9 wks pg.

I have an eye infection which is painful and making me feel lousy.

I don't suffer from MS luckily but have been feeling increasingly nauseous.

I have been putting of making lunch because the thought of making any food makes me feel nauseous. But I do have to make something because 2yo dd needs food and I'm in a catch 22 situation where although making food makes me feel sick, being hungry also makes me feel sick

I just phoned dh on his lunchbreak to explain how rubbish I feel and he doesn't get it. Which made me feel even more rubbish and ended up with me crying.

Its not logical I know. But I can't help it.

DD2 has now been given free reign over the fruit bowl but I am going to have pull myself together to make something substainal for her and me.

AIBU to expect a bit of sympathy from dh?

You are allowed to be as you are pregnant.

Perhaps you just caught your dh at a bad time in work, maybe he was being listened to and couldn't really talk properly.

Hang in there and sure he will be sympathetic when he gets home.

well you phoned him on his break from work to have a moan about how you are feeling. he perhaps has alot on his plate too. you are only 9 weeks you have a bit to go yet with regards feeling awful. while you have my sympathies try get something quick and convenient ready for dinner and much on ginger snaps or something. good luck with pregnancy.

How about you ask him if he can make DD a little packed lunch, he could do it the night before?

really OddSockMonster? ah here!!

To be fair to your DH, there's really not much he can do to help you at work. He can make 2 or 3 packed lunches the night before though.

Just make your little one a quick butty, then fruit and yoghurt, job done. DH won't get how rubbish you feel, cos he can't experience it. If he's normally supportive, let it go. x

I'm pregnant too, though further along. I relate to how you're feeling and I'd say your husband is probably busy and not intentionally unthinking. It's hard when ms takes hold, though all being well, it will pass in a few weeks. Meantime look after yourself and dd's. Light snacks, ginger sweets and peppermint tea helped me, also long walks! Good luck with the pregnancy, I hope you feel better soon.

I know there is nothing he can do. I just wanted some sympathy.

I'm just tired, hungry and feel sick.

Once I get through the first trimester I will be back to normal and not so emotional or needy.

I know I have little to moan about and on a normal day I would tell myself IABU.

But not today. Today I want looking after.

The thing is with blokes (sorry, I'm going there) is when presented with a problem, in this case your eye discomfort and nausea, they usually feel they are being asked to come up with a solution - when actually all you really want is a sympathetic ear.

He can't do anything about the problem from where he is and is therefore a bit stumped as to what he's supposed to do/say.

You are not being unreasonable to want a bit of sympathy, - just come here for it instead - oh you have!

Poor you, you must feel rotten.

Let your toddler eat fruit for lunch.

Make some toast for yourself and she can have a bit too to balance out the fruit.

Have you got any treatment for the eye?

I've got antibiotic eye drops from the doctor yesterday so hopefully will start to feel better soon. And then maybe I won't feel so rubbish which would help.

Fenton I think your right, I think he was just stumped. Poor man is probably wondering why I started crying.

Yep, this is him at work now

It's so true - I think many men flounder unless there is something practical they can do to fix it. dh has taken many years (and still struggles sometimes) to learn that if I'm upset all I need is for him to listen, or pretend to listen and then make a few sympathetic noises - he doesnt have to make it better.

I know my husband finds it hard to be sympathetic over the phone - he is more a hugs and helping type, so feels helpless and worried when I moan down the phone at him, especially because I am normally pretty good at just getting on with things. I hope you feel better soon and agree that packed lunches until you do might be the answer.

I feel for you, I really do.
You may think you don't have MS but you probably do. It's not just confined to the mornings.
Not much helped with mine I have to admit.
I couldn't keep much down.
Trial and error meant that I learnt quite quickly that I could keep down sugary, milky tea and home made orange juice ice lollies.
I kid you not! That's all I had for 5 months.
No idea how our bodies work but I had a healthy baby.
Find out what doesn't make you feel nauseous.
As for having to prep food - I can't imagine how that must be.
I know I couldn't have coped. But when I was PG it was my one and only so didn't have to worry about that.
Maybe have a chat with him when he comes home and explain that you find it really hard to prepare food without feeling sick.
Maybe you can set up some routine where you can avoid doing it for the time being.
Hopefully you will start to feel better after 3 months (that's what they kept telling me - they were wrong by the way).
I really hope you feel better and congrats!!!

To be fair to your husband he was on his lunch break and probably wanted a bit of a relax himself. If he does not give you a bit of sympathy when he gets home then maybe kick his arse then