My best friend and flatmate is going to a wedding tomorrow. I have been grudgingly invited but have declined as bride and I have never seen eye to eye (she is very entitled, as will become clear...!) and they're much more his friends than mine. Inside the invitation was this poem:
Now we are to be Mr & Mrs
We don't need a wedding list of dishes
We have two kettles, two toasters, two microwaves
We require a house for which we must save
If you would like to give us a gift
A cheque or vouchers would give us a lift
We like to think of it as our "Wishing Well"
Which will be filled with your love, we can tell.
Scrawled in scruffy handwriting as an afterthought:
'or just bring yourself x'
I was already pretty lost for words, then I read the invitation properly and discovered that they have stipulated 'this is an all-white wedding so we would appreciate it if all guests would wear full white'. WTAF?? So not only do guests have to sling wads of cash, they also have to stress about wearing white, regardless of whether it suits them or not and probably shell out on some monstrous outfit they will never wear again.....
Was I unreasonable to decline on the grounds that white washes me out and makes me look fat?? Quite apart from the bride being a cah who once told me that my boyfriend was 'uglier than David Mellor'...!!