To NOT book DD a pamper party? She's DESPERATE apparently.

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

She's about to turn 9. She was/is a very shy child but this year has seen something of a turnaround. In fact I hardly recognise her.

She's got some lovely friends old and new...she appears to be turning into a "pink and girly" girl and is asking for a pamper party....where they have a "makeover" etc.

I want her to have a pottery painting party.

AIBU not to do the pamper thing? It's going agin the grain!

[ChippingInWiredOnCoffee]

Yes Boomba there are - but this is what she wants to do. It's not the end of the world to put some nailpolish on and hair their hair braided fgs.

[Bonsoir]

Sounds fine to me. My DD will be 9 at her next birthday - if she wants a pamper party I will be happy to deliver.

[Bonsoir]

My DD was clamouring to learn Latin this afternoon. Now that I do have problems with!

[JackNoneReacher]

I would strongly resist a pamper party. But wouldn't insist on the pottery painting which sounds really dull to me.

Is there a compromise? Something different?

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

There's a salon...a nice one which offers girls package...bit of glitter and hair up and nails done. Then I could take them for an ice cream/cake at a lovely parlor nearby....

[diddl]

Surely though the "pampering" can be as much or as little as you are willing to allow?

There's a compromise to be had.

[Floggingmolly]

Oh go on. They're only hideous from an adult perspective; the kids love them!

[PatsysPyjamas]

I remember my 9th birthday as it was a real success. We each had our own t-shirts (could make it cotton shopping bags instead) to decorate with fabric paint, glitter, jewels etc, then we designed and ate ice creams sundaes. You could add a bit of nail varnish or hair braiding. it's nice as each girl gets to take home something they have made. Possibly this would seem too young now as children grow up younger these days, but it might feel more comfortable than make up and cocktails.

[TooMuchRain]

I really don't like the idea of preening as an activity at that age and think they would be much better actually doing something, but it's tricky if that's what she wants already, just a bit sad that she does at that age...

[MammaTJ]

Do not book her a pamper party and all the expense that entails. Do buy a few prrl off face masks, nail varnishes and other bits and bobs and have a pmaper party at home.

Get a friend who is in to that kind of thing to help out. Not too much money spent, everyone happy!!

[MammaTJ]

peel*

[Growlithe]

Boomba exercise is something that should obviously be part of their normal routine. This is a shy girl coming out of her shell, and choosing what she wants to do with her friends for her birthday.

And I would much rather do this than have a sleepover.

[Boomba]

I fail to see how applying nail varnish and having a hair braid, constitutes any kind of party. Sounds lame, as well as inappropriate

[Cherriesarelovely]

I can't see much point in a "cinema" party Boomba as noone actually gets to play or chat and maybe Op's Dd isn't into sporty stuff. I find some of the "pampering" sort of activities a bit yuk but a bit of nail varnish and hair brading.....jeez, why not? Fwiw my Dd and my Dp often have pampering nights and my Dp is a female pilot who is anything but girly in day to day life! I'd let her but obviously steer it so it is within the bounds of good taste!

[Boomba]

Don't have one them cherries!

I aren't asking for views/advice. OP asked for opinions on pampered parties

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

Boomba I know what you're saying...it's not a "party" at all is it....it's more of a "treat" or a Birthday Outing. I suppose that's the thing...when you're 9 going on 19 you don't want a "party" anymore.

[Cherriesarelovely]

It's about the fact that this little girl has made some new friends and that is what they are into.....I would draw the line at actual make up. My sil did a full on makeover party for her Dds aged 7, they had full make up on....it was odd!

[pictish]

I fail to see how applying nail varnish and having a hair braid, constitutes any kind of party.

You mean outside of the fact that they enjoy it?

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

Cherries she is in fact the most UN sporty kid in the world. She loves makeup and anything to do with that and she always has...she was 3 and showing a deep interest in the cosmetics counter. I am very un preened...I wear a bit of mascara and have my hair done but no nails or anything.

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

Cherries you've hit the nail on the head there....it is amazing that she's where she is. She was a silent child two years ago....no confidence at all. Now she's getting some guts and confidence and if it IS down to her newish "girly" mates then good on them.

[PatsysPyjamas]

It sounds kind of like you want to do it. Are you worried other parents won't approve?

[Remotecontrolduck]

Let her have it. She doesn't want a pottery party, it's her birthday. Why spend money on something she doesn't want?

Perhaps incorporate other elements into it, party with in the garden with music, jewellery marking, or a disco in a hall or something, with some nail painting and a few sparkly hair clips thrown in for the 'pamper' element.

But don't just ignore her wishes totally. There's nothing wrong with girls liking 'girly' things, I feel like things are going too far in the other direction now rather than a balance being achieved. It's not all all-consuming thing, putting nail varnish on doesn't mean her looks are all she's going to care about forever.