To not want to go to the gym

[boredoftrying]

Two weeks ago I found out that I am pregnant, I have one ds aged 6 and we have been trying for another for 5 years so completely and utterly over the moon!

I have a gym membership and before my bfp I was going around 4 times a week to try and lose some weight. Since my bfp I haven't been because I am completely paranoid and terrified something is going to go wrong and I don't intend to do anything major before I have my 12 weeks scan. I know this probably sounds ridiculous but I feel like this is probably our only chance and I need to do everything I can to make this baby stay where it is.

Trouble is dh is moaning that I've stopped going and keeps lecturing me about exercise and how I don't want myself to get as big as I did last time, I know he is talking sense because last time I embraced the whole "eating for two" and ended up the size of a small country. I know he is just trying to keep me motivated but he doesn't seem to get the whole paranoid thing and says I should carry on as normal and what will be will be.

AIBU to be extra cautious, should I try and chill out a bit or is this completely normal behaviour for someone who has tried for a baby for 5 years?!

Could you go and swim? That should be safe I'd think

Oh, and congratulations

Your H sounds like he's being a bit of a knob.

i think i'd feel exactly the same as you OP

i would think food intake would have a much larger impact on your weight than going to the gym.

Can you go for brisk walks instead to get some exercise?

5 yrs? Wow - congratulations !

As long as you're doing the same things as you were before you got pregnant (ie you don't start trying to suddenly run marathons etc) it's perfectly fine to exercise. Can you make an early GP appointment and talk to them about it to reassure you if you haven't booked in with a midwife yet?

I do understand the paranoia though! Your DH is lacking a bit in the empathy stakes on this one.

I wish I could go swimming but I absolutely hate it!! No reason behind the hatred I have just never enjoyed it, maybe I should give it a go again.

I do know where he is coming from as I have lost 3.5 stone in almost two years so there is no way I want to put all of that back on but I'm eating well and am planning on exercising once I'm over the horrible 12 week mark.

Walking is probably a good idea we have a dog which I walk but normally nice and leisurely maybe I should up the pace a bit and break a sweat!

Thank you for the congratulations, I'm only 7 weeks so completely terrified something is going to go wrong and scared to even think or talk about it! x

I saw my GP on Monday and he just told me not to worry and if it's meant to be then it will all be fine, is that a standard male response or something?!

DH and empathy are not two words that generally go together!

I would do what you feel is for the best, your DH is being a little odd to be frank.

Does your gym do any specialised classes for pregnant women? Our local leisure center does Aqua-aerobics and antenatal yoga, could be something to look into. There's also antenatal fitness DVDs you can get, I think Davina did one?

The PP who said about diet being the key is right, my trainer almost kills me in the gym but tells me I won't loose a single ounce if I don't stick to the nutrition plan. He reckons its 80% diet, 20% exercise.

I don't think yabu.... I found out I was pregnant 10days ago with my first child....

I'm a seasoned marathon runner without your history of trying for a baby & I havent been for a run since bfp.

I know that what will be will be & me carrying on with my norml activities will not harm the baby yet I have been unable to run....

I'm putting it down to paranoia & thinking of taking up swimming

do what feels best for you, no one else

Have you explained to him your reasons for not going? Or does he think you're being paranoid and worrying unnecessarily (like my DP sometimes does just because he's a man and I'm a woman - not because he's a selfish git)?

Restarting exercise at 12 weeks is actually a bad idea. The advice is not to start anything new when pg, but it's fine to carry on with what you are doing when you become pregnant.

Im a long term ttcer too (2.5 years and counting), and I did keep gymming when I was pregnant following IVF. The embryo didn't develop properly and I mc'd but that had nothing to do with taking moderate exercise. You could see on the scans that it just didn't grow. After the mc I made sure I got back to the gym as soon as I was feeling up to it so that I would be already exercising when we try again. I plan to carry on exercising if we are lucky enough to get another BFP.

I understand that this pregnancy is precious, but exercise (within normal limits - not running a marathon a day or whatever) will not affect the outcome. If the embryo isn't going to work out, it won't. If it is, going to the gym will not affect that. Women who are fit generally have easier pregnancies and easier births too. :)

On the one hand i don't think there's any evidence that doing exercise is harmul.

But my petsonal view is that the pregnant mum's state of mind is of paramount importance. I think making you do exercise when you are a bit wary is as bad as stopping someone who wants to exercise.

And i really don't think that exercise causes miscarriage at all. But i know from experience that if you miscarry then you go a bit nuts and blame yourself in a completely irrational way. (I still need reassurance from DH that i didn't cause the last one by going to a BBQ.) So again i'm with you if you don't want to risk it.

Don't eat too much - simples.