Aibu to feel a bit disappointed in these parents?

[Caitycat]

For several years I have organised a community theatre project in a local church which involves both adults and children. They rehearse separately and come together in the final week for the last rehearsals and performances. I do this totally voluntarily as do all the participants and the week of the performances is manic involving hours of preparation, painting, stitching etc. There is no charge to any participant.

All the adults involved work full time and are therefore missing family and rest time to participate. We love doing it and don't begrudge it at all but this week I must admit I've started to feel a bit resentful.

We have 36 children involved this year. I gave out a letter at the start of rehearsals detailing what they needed to wear (colourful tshirt, skirt/shorts/trousers in contrasting colour so nothing tricky), giving all rehearsal times and dates and asking parents to commit to helping during one of the six performances. I gave my email address and asked them to contact me directly if there were any problems.

This is the week of the performance. A huge number of parents have asked me what their child is supposed to wear and when reminded about the letter said oh yes but that was ages ago (April) we haven't got it anymore. I have been told this week that three children won't be coming to the Friday or Saturday performances which is going to really mess up the choreography. Several others can't make at least one of the three final rehearsals (the only ones where the whole cast comes together) - again none bothered to let me know before now. Only one parent out of the 36 has agreed to help out for an evening performance and three others are "checking their diaries" others have said they can't possibly because they have a younger child (understandable in a single parent household but they are not) or because "I work 9-5 so I need to rest in the evenings". I have had to ask my family and friends to come and help out as a favour because I would otherwise have to cancel.

AIBU to expect some participation and active engagement from parents who have allowed their child to do this activity (which they would provably have to pay for if they did it anywhere else)? Thanks for reading my tirade I always seem to use mn to moan!

I'd "sack" the people who can't be in every performance, they've had long enough notice. Then use the last rehearsals to rejig the chorography.

Community theatre can be a pain, I speak as someone involved in it myself.

claraschu, Sparklymummy is explaining the laws about child peformances not trying to be a wet blanket. I expect the OP knows all about the regulations for her LEA, they vary a little from place to place.

They did this at dd's brownie's, too : help or your kid's out. And siblings could come too to pre-empt the old "But I have other children" excuse.

Those who are having a go at sparkly she is absolutely correct assuming people are paying for tickets (if it's just a performance for parents without paying, I think it doesn't count, but I may be wrong).

It's not a "wouldn't it be a good idea", it is actually a legal requirement.
It is under the "children in entertainment" laws and was brought in to stop children from being exploited.

If a child is in more than (of the top of my head) 6 performances which are paid for tickets in 6 months, they need to be licenced, and if they are in fewer, they still have to be registered with the council. Unless the OP has an exemption certificate (can't remember what the regs. are for that, it probably depends on you county) in which case they don't need individual licences, although the county may still come to inspect to check all is as it should be. If it's not correctly done then the council can close the performance down.

I expect the OP knows this. If you don't, then I suggest you contact your council and ask for the regulations for your area.
It's also good to see which parents are going to actually help rather than intend to help if you need them to give you a chaperone's licence before you cast.

Thanks I contacted the council who advised that as long as I have CRB checked chaperones with the children at all times (names provided to them and on risk assessments) numbers can be made up with others. We have to and do have separate changing areas for kids. I hope that's right but assume it is and so have it in writing.

Thank you DeWe.

From my experience with our own LEA, "shutting down" a community group is the last thing they want to do. Our own particular licensing lady is lovely and would work with a group to make sure that everything is above board and the children are all looked after properly. Closing down a production would only happen if there was a serious breach of legal requirements and the company were not cooperative.

DeWe is also correct that if it is a paid to watch performance it is possible that children will need to be licensed too. I do not think this is the case with the Op's scenario but the laws regarding supervision of children involved do stand. Whilst it may involve a bit of red tape it is worth it in the end to cover yourself and make sure that the children in your care are properly supervised.

OP, glad to hear everything is above board! I wasn't trying to undermine you are pick holes with your operation, I think it's great what you do!

When I say our dc's dance school only allow crb checked adults backstage, this is a big dance school (200+ students) and when you are responsible for that many children you need a good team of helpers. We have approx 8 changing rooms, chaperones and crb checked helpers in each (approx 3), runners, people signing kids in (and out) at the stage door, stage hands... It's a real operation and people are always being asked to get crb checked. Some do, some don't. Without the few that do the shows would not be possible.

Well done Caitycat, what you do is very valuable imo. The scout movement next door to me has closed totally and sold its premises. Plenty of children on the waiting list to join, just not enough volunteers to keep it going. This scout troup had been going since 1912 and was always fantastically attended, such a shame.

Perhaps the answer would be to tell parents that without their assistance backstage there will be no show. And definitely start charging!