to be very concerned that paedophile is living in my street

[Madmum24]

Live in a very naice area, was flicking through the local paper, only to discover that a man several doors away has been convicted of downloading hundreds of images (category 4, including bestiality related stuff) Massive shock, I feel quite sick about it as my children are the only ones that play outside (detached houses, high hedges etc, kids play in their back gardens) but mine do go around the block on scooters/bikes etc.

Admittedly I have never seen him (in fact I wouldn't recognize any of my neighbours!) but I feel so unnerved about the kids being out of the garden. They are sensible, no not to talk to strangers etc but still, I feel as if the area has been spoiled now (for me) I know we could all have dodgy people beside us, I suppose it is better to know etc, etc, but AIBU to feel as if I want to move now?

OP

I know you are really worried and probably feel a bit like you should have known. People who down load these images are just that people. You can't tell by looking at them what they are doing.

One thing to think about is that he has not been convicted of a contact crime, ie he has looked at images but not touched a child.

And the evidence (not that there is a lot, but gelling more all the time) is that most people to not progress to contact crime.

This man will have a set of rules (a SOPO) which he has to live by. Breaching it could put him in prison.

The SOPO is not for the benefit of the defendant, it is for the protection of the public. Usually it includes restrictions on interactions with children and makes only inadvertent contact acceptable.

So if your child goes to the shop to buy sweets and he is buying a loaf of bread, that is inadvertent contact. Coming over and talking to your children won't be.

Every police force has police officers who deal only with these offenders. You could contact your local police. Not sure how much information they would give you, data protection vs need to know kind of thing but they will probably talk through with you the typical conditions.

How are you feeling about it now op?

I would echo sashh...sounds like he is a looker not a toucher. Not that that it makes it any better, but at least there does't seem to be any chance that he's going to talk to children in the street and invite them in. And at least you know about it. Just re-inforce to your children that they never go anywhere without asking you first.
And presumably there have been no incidences of anything happening before you knew about it. All that has changed is that now you do.(If you get my rambling drift).Doesn't make the area you live in any less nice.

When you say "few" what does that mean? I've seen the BBC use the word "few" to describe numbers as big as 43. 43 houses away in a Naice area could be quite a distance.

Sorry, you did say "several", but I doubt you meant only 2 or 3 with that word, either. So exactly how many doors away?

a previous supply teacher has been sent to prison for viewing underage images.

a paedophile will want to be near children, that is how their mind's work.

I can only suggest teach your children stranger/danger and inappropriate behaviour from anyone.

While it is not something anyone wants in their street, unfortunately people like this are everywhere. At least you know and can be a bit more aware, teach your children what is/isnt acceptable etc. i wouldnt stop your children playing outside or anything though.
Children are much more at risk from people they know like family/friends than random people on the street. My mums friends husband was put in prison last year for 23 years as he was abusing/raping his daughter for 17 years, nobody had any idea, he was the nicest bloke you could ever meet (obviously not) and it was a massive shock for everyone. Many children had spent time with him and everyone felt awful, all children had to be questioned etc and it just makes you feel sick. As it turns out he was only touching his daughter, nobody else, but it still made everyone very nervous about giving their kids freedom etc. but you cant not live a life because of a few evil people.

If he's been convicted of Internet related charges, the chances are he has no interest in actually snatching a child off the street and abusing them.

People have different risk factors - if he was a danger to your children his probation officer would've set up an exclusion zone. If you're very worried, call your local probation's victim services unit.

YANBU to feel disgusted. About 10 miles from us, in a small village, there was a guy who basically helped to run an international child porn ring. I have friends who live there and it was horrific for everyone. The man in question is now in prison and the police did a great job shutting down part of the operation, but it is scary.

Yes, we all know how common child abuse is, but it's still shocking when you realise that it's YOUR neighbour who's involved.

sigh. I have huge anxiety and paranoia over this.

It stems from personal experience. But I am very over protective of Dd.

The very idea of CRBS make me laugh. You only have arecord if youve been caught. Many never get caught.

Always Always be over cautious. something or nothing could happen, but what if it did?

OP in a way it is better you know now I guess x

YABU - as there's have said...they are everywhere and the clever inestimable don't get caught. I personally knew one and he was acquitted and left to do as he pleased....fortunately he shuffled off the planet not long after.

All you can do is educate your children. If he doesn't get to knew them its unlikely he is a threat. Pedophiles often like to build a relationship with their victims - grooming.

YANBU. I was molested (no penetration) at age 7 by a 15 year old stranger who had just moved into the area. It turned out he had three prior convictions in his previous area and after spending some time in a juvenile detention center, his parents had moved to avoid the embarassment. My parents lodged a complaint with the police and after a couple more incidents with other kids he went to court again. My dad always reckoned that this boy had probably been abused himself. At the time it happened, we were playing with some friends at their house and this boy approached me telling me that my mum had told me she wanted me to come home. . My parents had done the stranger danger talk but had not talked about inappropriate sexual behaviour.

Thanks for the replies :-)

He is literally several doors away, as in 3. It is just such a shock, what bothers me is that my children are the only ones that play outside the garden (perhaps the others knew about this before?) so if he was going to be taking pictures whilst standing looking out his window then it would be my kids IYKWIM? I would feel differently if we lived in a large estate with loads of kids, but it is a small street (about 20 houses) Also everyone has high hedges, so I can't actually see my kids if they are out on the bikes etc. I know the chance of him wanting to snatch them is very low, but the thought of someone who has images of very young children being sexually abused a few doors away is utterly disgusting. I'm not very naïve, but you sort of think "that happens to other people"

Anyway, it is time for me to step up my vigilance (I'm usually so relaxed) and get on with things.

Thanks again.

Yanbu. I think you should speak to your neighbours and show them the article though. Even if they don't have children, they may have visiting gc/nieces etc so need to be aware not to let children out alone.

Mad cold comfort but if he's been downloading category 4 pictures he won't be interested in pics of your kids playing on their bikes . I do agree with others though, at least you know now.

Mimi . I hope you have been able to recover from your experience.

Where do you think he should live though? There just isn't enough space in the country for him to be away from children completely. Nor enough space in prison. All you can do is teach your children that their bodies are their own and to never be alone with someone unless you have allowed it. I refuse to worry about paedophiles, it's bad enough worrying about traffic, heights, measles and untrained dogs, all of which are far more likely to be a threat to your child playing out than this man.
Don't let it spoil your feelings about the house.

I think you live very near me OP. I was properly appalled but my youngest DC is 17 nearly so I talked myself into being pleased that he has been caught and convicted, better the devil you know and all that.

I'd be more concerned about the ones I don't know about or those who have violent history (once they've gone physical they're almost guaranteed to repeat) of attacking children. Assume that there is always someone ready to attack if given the opportunity, make your kids aware of that and make sure that nobody has that opportunity with them. Teach them to stay in groups, not talk to strangers, stay away from adults who try to get them in a car even if they know them, to never go anywhere alone and to scream blue murder if anyone tries anything.

I now have a neighbour who was convicted of very similar crimes to OP but his also included child pornography of a sadistic nature. He hired a hotshot lawyer and got off with a suspended sentence; he was a local politician so it made the national press. We instantly recognised him when he moved in.

I did feel angry and wanted to "out" him to other people when he first came to the street, but rather than go round his house with a flaming torch, I just keep an eye out for anything odd. If he had actually been charged or convicted of molesting someone it would be a different matter.

I used to work with someone whose sister was murdered by someone they just regarded as a rather creepy odd neighbour (rather than a potential murderer). Obviously in hindsight it is easy to be wise.

I think the best thing to do is set boundaries as to what your children can and can't do (i.e. enter someone's house or garden) and trust your instincts.

you never know who you are living near and bumping into day in day out - think of all the families and friends of convicts who have said they were shocked because "X is such a nice person" etc etc. Someone we knew has a conviction and has now been in prison for a child sex offence - they used to be a regular santa @ village fetes etc and YES they were CRBd for that role!

It does not matter whether you know the man next door has history or not. You need to be vigilant and make sure your children know about appropraite and inappropriate banter, and indeed some of the ruses people might use (eg offer of sweets, coming to see new puppy etc) and that they NEVER go anywhere without your say so NO MATTER WHO is asking, or how quick they think it will be.

Mad cold comfort but if he's been downloading category 4 pictures he won't be interested in pics of your kids playing on their bikes

yes but don't forget that Bridger had "innocent" pictures of April and her friends stored on his PC alongside folders about child murder victims and porn. These people do move on from one activity to another.