To think the sample girls pack from the school nurse was totally inappropriate.

[Picturesinthefirelight]

Dd wanted a private talk this morning. Turns out that in Friday they had the puberty talk and were given a pack. Except they ran out of time so no time to discuss how to use the products.

There were a couple of always panty liners, three Always towels a normal one, a night one and a "silk" one. They were huge. I can't see dd bring able to wear a leotard in one of those.

Then there were two Tampax Compact (the ones with plastic applicators) one Regular Yellow one & one green Super one. As if a year 6 child will be able to insert one if those. When I was at school we were given a same of the special lites ones. They could put her off for life.

Luckily I had anticipated this and a couple of months ago bought a lovely little make up style case by Lillets contains various if their teen products. Smaller child sized towels but that are supposed to be extra absorbent and small easier to insert tampons.

I know they were free samples but really!!'n

I started at age 11, first few months of secondary. Before our "talk" at school. I used towels. I was so heavy I would use nighttime towels in the day, extra long, extra wide. Getting the tampax samples at the end of the school year saved me - meant I could practise, then ask my mum for some. The tampon and towel combo did me for years. I had v.v.v. heavy periods though - on lots of drugs and then the pill aged 14 to try and lighten them. So not every girl will suit smaller products.

You're overthinking it. DD1 wears a leotard for dance every day, she's now 17 and has always just worn normal pads as she can't get on with tampons. They don't show. She had this worry when she first started (at 14, I'd very much suspect if your DD is typical dancer shape they are unlikely to be imminent, btw, as dancing to this extent definitely holds it back) but you really can't tell she's wearing pads. She does that ballet thing where you put one leg right up touching your ear (winces) and if you can't tell with that or with splits, you won't tell with anything. Chill out over it and let your DD find her own way. Everyone else at the dance school will be in exactly the same position.

Loving 'Sannies'

Very early eighties here, Mum bought me a prepack survival kit to keep in my school bag. It was a sealed plastic bag with a couple of sanitary towels (modern sticky backed ones) some paracetamol, paper knickers just incase, a little pack of wet wipes and a leaflet.
I don't know where she got it from but she was ahead of the game.

She didn't use tampax but bought some to leave in the bathroom, but I never got on with them, 4 babies later and I still don't.

You had to write to 'the Nun' at Dr Whites for a free sample then and she would pop them in the post.

Surely the samples should be ones they can actually use when they very first start. Arnt the first couple of periods supposed to be very light?

Wish someone had told my body that.

DS started her periods in year 6. They are really heavy and we thank god for those big chunky towels and super tampax.

She needs to be secure that what will happen to her is normal, be her periods light or heavy. She needs to be aware of all of the protection available and how to use it.

You need to speak to her about all this in conjunction with the school not get all huffy at what they have given her.

Disclaimer: have only read OP.

YABU. In my mother's generation it was common for girls to start their periods with no idea what was going on - then they panicked. This is thoughtful and useful. They should not have been handed out without some advice on use, but as long as that followed in the next lesson, no harm done. Some kids don't have parents who will have prepared them, or will buy they supplies in advance. It's good that they have this help, even if some parents are not so keen. After all, it's not aimed at the parents, or at the kids with lots of support. It's aimed at the others.

I remember announcing to my dad I was a lady now and that was why I was dressed had to toe in black in the height of summer during my first period.

So sorry for your loss MrsDeVere.

I think what plenty is saying is that your DD may well not feel that she wants to dance, either because she's in pain and generally feeling like crap or because she's embarrassed and convinced everyone can tell she's on get period.

Yes, that is what I meant. Maybe she'll be lucky and have light, pain free periods but that's not guaranteed, even if she's a small build and a dancer. I had a friend who was tiny and a gymnast who had very heavy periods from the age of 9.

In the first couple of years there were months when it felt as much as I could do to drag myself through a normal school day.

So sorry MrsD x

I was nine when I started my periods. The size, shape, whatever else of a pad wasn't horrifying to me- it was the fact I had to use them at all!

In fact, because I was so worried about leaking at first, the bigger the pad the better. Obviously I didn't have experience of tampons until a few years later and I never got on with them but I would have needed bigger because my periods were so heavy.

It depends on the individual what they will need, and just because your DD will wear a leotard every day next year you think it's unreasonable to include bigger ones as samples when they could help a lot of others realise what size they need?

Companies probably stopping doing teen ranges because no one bought them.

Stop being so fussy, and let your daughter find her own way. She's old enough to know all about her own body, and so she should. Just be thankful she doesn't have to use the stuff that we had to back in the 70's...

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/DR-WHITES-SANITARY-BELT-10-LOOPED-TOWELS-NAPKINS-/230650387488

Sorry for you MrsD

Our sanitary products are easily to hand in the bathroom. DD has a cosmetic purse sized bag to keep supplies in for school, but isn't that fussy as her bag is clear plastic.

There's no attempt to hide things from the males in our house. In fact, before DD began, DH was with me when we talked to DD about it all. He just wanted her to realise that if her periods began and I wasn't immediately able to help her, she could go to him and he'd help her.

Her first period was quite heavy, her second was worse.

When her second period began, she'd been wearing jeans at school for a dress down day and met me at my mum's house for tea. She'd leaked badly and got quite distressed. I'd planned to get her some new trousers anyway so shot into town (5 mins walk) and got new jeans while Mum quietly helped her out in the bathroom. When I got back she was much calmer, cleaned up and wrapped up in mum's dressing gown.

Following on from marriedinwhite's post, it is the reassurance that matters most to daughters, not being picky over what sanitary products to use. Dd is now comfortable in dealing with her periods and is happy with her choice of product. If she wants to use something different, she just needs to let me know.

Oh this brings me back to ju mother having hysterics that I would deflower myself with tampons.
She was adamant I would use towels, with a belt, no less...... HA! That lasted an hour.
I had horrendoeously heavy periods from the start, and used super tampax tampons.

I was so happy to have got them free, as my mother would have never bought them for me, and I would have never seen them!

Maybe we need the nurses to introduce mooncups?!

I got a similar pack. Just use it as an opportunity to discuss her options

Yes Eileen, that was what was on offer to me... Hurray for the nurses and their freebie packs of mixed San pro.

Exactly whataloadofpiffle. It's a start of a conversation.

Have to say my daughter has very heavy periods so needs the bigger tampons and she is 12.
you sound ridiculous

Oh mrs D.. Just hugs to you. We all need to understand how lucky we are to have our dds. I know I do. Xxxx

Mrsdevere

I'm sure the thread has moved on since but...

I was in Y6 when we had the 'period' talk. My DH was in the same school yr & makes jokes about the girls being taken off & told all the girl stuff, like how to get your DH to do what you want I'm in my 30s, so we're talking over 20yrs ago, so its hardly a new thing. I was 11 but I was the oldest in the yr.

I used towels for my first period at age 12, but used non-applicator tampons soon after that because that's all my DM had. She doesn't "believe" in applicator tampons, but that's a whole other thread...

Tampax still make a slimmer "lites" range but it is also for lighter flow by virtue of the fact that it is simply smaller.

Your fanjo is really quite flexible - its the nature of the beast as it were!!

OP - By all means encourage your DD to use applicator tampons rather than towels if you think that will be discreet, but if her flow is heavy, & it could well be, a "lites" tampon might be useless. The free samples pack is just that. Free samples. Not obligatory. If you feel your dd needs alternatives, provide them.