to think that if you're the organiser of a group then don't cancel a meeting

[Downsouth666]

saying that you need to spend time with an ill relative and then arrange another meeting doing something totally different on the same night at the same time.

That's it really. Was due to go to a meetup that only had a few going then the organiser cancelled to say that her relative was ill and she needed to spend time with her. Next day she put up a new meetup for the same night doing something totally different. I know that we probably all make excuses if we don't fancy doing something but this was so obvious! I would have preferred the organiser to say that because not many people going she'll reschedule it to another time and do something else instead.

PS Have named changed as regular poster and might out myself if other members of this meetup see this.

YANBU - though, maybe the relative had a miraculous recovery and she forgot about the original meeting

Could be but if so it was quick as she cancelled the original meeting two days before arranging a new one.

There were messages on the website last night from someone attending and asking if the others were in a certain pub and she (organiser) replied back saying that they were and would be there for another hour. I was so tempted to post asking how her mother was bit didn't

I'm not sure I could have been so restrained, I probably would have asked so you are definitely better at resisting temptation .

I think I would just innocently ask her how her mum is or make a comment that I hope your mum is better now.

Was the original meet up something that would involve more work on behalf of the organiser (e.g. confirming numbers attending, collecting deposits, booking places, providing food etc). The only reasonable explanation I can think of is if they switched from an event which would involve some work beforehand by the organiser to 'let's just meet up for a couple of drinks in the local pub', as that would give them more time to visit/help their mum.

The original event was at her house but only 2 people said yes to it. It was just a bring a bottle and chill out evening so she wouldn't have had to do any work.

When she arranged it I think she was expecting more people to come as she'd done similar things in the past. I think the reason for cancelling it was because they'd only be 3 of us there and she likes a big crowd.

tbh if she'd have been upfront and said she wanted to change it to a pub so there would be a bigger crowd it wouldn't have been a problem.

Downsouth: we've had a family illness and I'd be much more able to manage a pub meetup than hosting drinks in my house. To do the latter I would have to clean/tidy the house far more than I am at the moment.

Maybe a member of her household was ill.