to feel 'fat' 6 months after child birth

[almostheadgirl]

please go easy on me - new poster...feel I need some perspective here. Is it unreasonable to expect to be 'back to normal' weight 6 mths after having 2nd baby? I'm 5ft 9 and 10st 7 - normally I'm about 9 stone but put on 4 stone (I know!!) during both pregnancies. Help me get some much needed perspective. AIBU to think and feel VERY chunky at this weight? Sorry if this seems a needy post, I realise I very probably am BU, but sleep deprivation and general exhaustion genuinely does make me feel very 'bleugh' about it all. Any encouragement would go a long way! Should add, obviously all worth it, I love my babies beyond anything, but really struggling with this.

Did you go back to 9 stone after your first pregnancy?

I am the same height and was the same weight before my first pregnancy and only went down to 10st4 after my first. Tbh I looked better at that weight, as at 9 stone was all bony hips. It took a mental adjustment to be happy at that weight as getting back to pre pregnancy weight is supposed to be the goal, and your wardrobe is full of clothes that don't fit.

I think your body changes shape after having children too.

My second baby is now 4.5 months and I'm still over 11 stone. I'm aiming to get back to 10 stone ish and have written off 9 stone as unrealistic and unhealthy. If you're wobbly, I think exercise rather than weight loss is the way forward.

Glad you're feeling better! It's tricky bringing up something that you see as a problem when you know other people would be happy with it.

No one gets all the luck anyway even if your slim. My friend is only a couple of stone heavier but no stretch marks - my tum looks like a road map. :D

"you're"...I should say.

9 stone at your height isn't just ok on the BMI calculator, but sounds very skinny to me. What you weigh now sounds much more reasonable. You are not fat. You are not chunky. You are slim.

I'm two inches shorter and over a stone heavier, and I'm not fat.

please don't pass on unrealistic expectations to your baby.

Thanks ladies. Particularly Noblegiraffe and pianodoodle - your words really hit home and made a lot of sense to me. Noblegiraffe, that's so interesting...I think you may be right, I was VERY slim at 9st and probably I need to readjust my expectations. I went back to 9st fairly easily after pregnancy 1, but you're quite right, a little heavier might look healthier if I can just adjust my way of thinking about it. Thanks again.
Specialsubject - thanks for your 'firm but fair' words. With regards to ''passing on unrealistic expectations to my baby" - with all due respect and without going into my family circumstances , I can assure you I won't be and tbh find the implication rather unhelpful.

I realize this is an old post @almostheadgirl ! But I am feeling low. I am 5’9 and I was 9 stone 7 aged 19-30. Then Covid hit and I went to 10 stone which I hated but I got pregnant !

Anyway -
I gained 49 Pounds went up 13 Stone 7.
it took a year but I managed to lose it all. Then I started trying for a baby again and I was really lucky to her pregnant quickly . The second time despite promising myself I’d only gain 35 max I gained 56 pounds !!! So I weighted 196 the day I gave birth.
Almost 4 months on from the baby I weigh 156 pounds - 11 stone 2. Im sat here crying. On the one hand I’ve lost 40 pounds in leSs 4
months but I still have 17 pounds To go to hit 10
stone and it will be hard ! Then I’ll not be happy until I’m 9 stone 9 (135)

I want to wear Clothes and feel good but I feel so frumpy. I hate my reflection. I hate my belly. I pray by 6 months ( January ) I’ll be down to 10 stone 7! Anyway!

I wanted to ask - did you ever feel happy again! Thanks for listening to me xx