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to be pissed off that DH is being unsupportive and negative about my business doing well?

15 replies

MoodyDidIt · 11/06/2013 18:47

i have a small business thats been ticking along, not making much money for the last couple of years but suddenly it seems to have taken off. i am really happy about it and very excited. its boosted my confidence and i also love my job itself and actually enjoy going to work.

i had a MC 2 months ago and was devastated, but this has been a much needed boost for me. as now my life seems to have found a new direction and i am happy with that. (we are still going to ttc #3 but its not the be all and end all now iyswim)

but while i have had excitement and positivity from my friends and other family, all i have had from DH is a kind of grumpy negativity. some of my work involves initially visiting clients to give them quotes at their homes or businesses and he really doesnt like this especially if its a man and makes disparaging, "jokey" comments.

yet if i wasnt working he would soon have something to say about it! as when we first got together he used to moan that his exW never went to work and being lazy and not contributing financially, but seems wives of his can't win either way.... Hmm

OP posts:

GemmaTeller · 11/06/2013 18:50

Way to go you!

He's saying those things as he feels jealous and insecure.


yaimee · 11/06/2013 18:50

He sounds quite jealous and insecure. Is there a reason he doesn't trust you around men, or is it that he feels it's a dangerous situation?
Do you think he could be threatened by the success of the business?


trice · 11/06/2013 18:52

Poor flower, he is having manliness issues over your success. Perhaps if you put yourself down all the time and minimise any talk of success outside the home? Maybe you could wear a veil when you enter other mens houses?


Yama · 11/06/2013 18:55

Your husband is a dick.


MoodyDidIt · 11/06/2013 18:55

no there is no reason why he would not trust me :( and its absolutely not a dangerous situation, (i can't say what my business is as i dont want to be outed in rl lol )

and i cant see why he would be threatened, it can only be a positive thing, me earning money, surely Confused

OP posts:

NynaevesSister · 11/06/2013 18:58

Could it be a mix of emotions? Could he still be upset from the MC himself? Maybe he feels caution for you too in that you might be bouncing back too soon?

Also it could be a red flag for a self centred personality. Your work doing well takes up time you might usually spend on him?


MoodyDidIt · 11/06/2013 19:14

he is still upset, as am i. but we are both moving on and its getting easier with time. as cliched as that sounds

i dont know what his problem is

he was like it when i first started the business as well Hmm

OP posts:

Boosterseat · 11/06/2013 19:20

Well done on your business taking off, tough times out there for small business he should be so bloody proud of you.

I'm pissed off for you!


ChippingInWiredOnCoffee · 11/06/2013 19:53

Nyaves Hmm Really???

Moody - is he always this much of a twat??


ChippingInWiredOnCoffee · 11/06/2013 19:54

Have you asked him directly what his problem is?


XiCi · 11/06/2013 19:57

Well done on your business, that must be a great feeling. Re your husband, are things that bad that you can't just ask him why he is being negative and what his problem is? I would have pulled my DH up at the first sign of this. I think asking on here you're just going to feel more resentful from the answers you get when you could probably sort ot all out with a quick chat with him.


babyhmummy01 · 11/06/2013 19:58

sounds like he is projecting his upset over MC onto this situation - talk to him!

Congrats on the success though hun sounds like you deserve it


SquinkiesRule · 11/06/2013 20:43

Well done on the business OP.
My Dh never had any qualms about me going into strangers homes for work (nurse) the only time he ever raised an eye brow was when I had found weapons under the pillow of a dementia patient. Even I was Confused your Dh is being a total ass about your business.


HollyBerryBush · 11/06/2013 20:45

Do you think he is still in mourning for the MC? that he would like a 3rd child and he sees your energies directed elsewhere?


Ilikethebreeze · 11/06/2013 20:45

It isnt a positive to him.
You are smashing his ego.

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