To have been hoiking my judgy pants up over this?

[Itsnotahoover]

Went to a concert last night and caught the late bus back to the hotel. At one stop, a young couple got on with their four children, aged from about 9 months to 4 years at a guess. They were all wearing short sleeves and the baby that was being carried was screaming and shivering to the point of teeth chattering as it had dropped bloody cold by that point. Both parents seemed intoxicated, and the mother staggered and nearly dropped the baby as she went to sit down.

I'm not normally one to judge, as I have no idea of the circumstances surrounding this incident, but I can't think of a situation where it is ever appropriate to have 4 small children on a bus at 1am, shivering and crying, whilst the parents are drunk! It played on my mind after they'd got off. WIU to judge?

y,y I can't imagine any event requiring both me and DP to get drunk when our DC are with us.

YANBU them kids should have been in bed not freezing their backsides off at 1am because their selfish parents want to get pissed.

As for people asking "what did you do to help" well thats just silly, what was the OP supposed to do?

Thank you, was beginning to think I was wrong for being a bit concerned. It just didn't sit right with me and it was playing on my mind all night (whilst being kept awake by the inconsiderate twunts in the room next door GRRRR).

sometimes we see things that just doesn't as you said Sit right nothing we can do really but it shows you are caring and not judgey to be concerned about the children , I am sure they were up at the crack of dawn with the baby and are nursing hangovers saying never again how stupid

I guess it's that none of us know if this was something the parents planned or of it just ended up that way. Someone might have offered then a lift and then backed out, or even for then to stay over and backed out.

We can't really judge their whole parenting on a less than 5 min snippet.

Interesting that they only seamed intoxicated as opposed to smelling of booze.

Yes we can.

Inadequate clothing, middle of the night,visibly cold baby in arms on a bus, pissed to the point of stumbling parents.

All, unless the OP missed a masked gunman, the consequences of free parental will, and selfish choices.

I'm judging.

ok, I've thought of an acceptable scenario: parents on child free night out, both get drunk. Have to collect children due to emergency situation for child carer. Unlikely, though!

Perhaps, they were going to drive home, drank too much and decided it would be dangerous. Or were going to get a taxi or a lift and something went wrong.

Wrong to be visibly drink in charge of small DCs, but far far better to be on the bus than driving home or getting a lift with a pissed friend.

I never judge time of night, having no babysitters and occasionally taking DDs to late parties or deliberately choosing late flights to swim on last day of holidays.
(I do have DDs who are very good at not being grumpy late at night, sometimes too good when I'd like them in bed).

It's just another depressing example of shit parenting. Yanbu

If the baby was dangerously cold it wouldn't have been crying.They conserve their energy.Maybe they were staggering because they were tired and sleepy.

Yanbu at all, why is there always some excuse on mumsnet for this. Parents were pissed in charge of children outside the home. Chidren were inappropriately dressed, the poor baby could get hypothermia fgs

startail if you knew you had children with you and you arrived in the car why would you then decide to drink?

Interesting that they only seamed intoxicated as opposed to smelling of booze.

I was at the back of the bus and they were at the front. I have no idea whether they smelt of alcohol or roses tbh. I was basing this opinion on the fact they were slightly staggery, slurry and acting like they were drunk. Maybe they weren't which is why I said they seemed intoxicated.

Not you yourself, btw, but the 'you' in the hypothetical scenario.....

Oh OP of course YANBU. Even if they had been taken by surprise by the weather (warm days, quite cold evenings) they're a bit thick really aren't they? It's hardly been tropical lately. How many brain cells does it take to remember to take extra layers of clothing out with you FGS.

At the very least the "mother" should have gratefully accepted the offer of a cardi for the baby.

You'll still get replies along the lines of "How dare you judge! The parents might have a phobia about borrowing clothes/might have recently been brought back to earth after being abducted by aliens and unsure what time of year it is" etc.

CK
Of course yanbu, some people are so desperate not to appear judgey on mn it makes me laugh!

YANBU. The drinking is inexcusable, being intoxicated and in the care for young (and therefore vulnerable) children is wrong,

I judge all the time. What I'm not prepared to do I'd judge on a situation I have no real experience of.

The OP can judge - she was there.

*is not I'd

Hoover - you weren't by any chance coming back after a large gig in North London, were you?

You shouldn't and I wouldn't drink to the point I couldn't drive home, but people do stupid things sometimes.

Adults who rarely get out getting carried away at a family party, all to easy to drink to much especially if DCs finding other children to play with and or other adults to watch them.

DFs didn't get drunk, but had a wonderful time dancing at an evening wedding party they weren't going to come to, because DD2 'baby sat' their toddler until she fell asleep her push chair. (DD 2 is incredibly good with small children I just make them cry)

Hoover - you weren't by any chance coming back after a large gig in North London, were you?

No, a large gig in Manchester :) Bon Jovi to be precise! Was abso-fucking-lutely amazing!!

Ah...we were at Stone Roses and there were a lot of very drunken people trying to get home afterwards...!

You don't stay out till 1am getting pissed when you're in charge of young children, you just don't, not if you're any kind of decent parent anyway. YANBU.