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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think allowing your dc to chase ducks / birds is just wrong

112 replies

Fairylea · 08/06/2013 15:22

Just come back from a visit to the nearby pond to feed the ducks with my family. Ds and dd were enjoying throwing some duck seed and looking at them.

Along came 2 boys of a similar age to my dd (9) with their mum who proceeded to run at our gathering of ducks and frighten the life out of them. Effectively enjoying making them run away and scaring them. The mum looked bemused until she saw me glare at her and then she half heartedly said to the boys "oh don't do that, that family is feeding them".

Now yes some might say they are just ducks, does it matter etc. But I've seen so many dc do this recently (we visit the pond a lot) and parents seem to think it's some kind of acceptable game. It's cruel and unnecessary. Feed the ducks or birds ffs don't bloody chase them!

I admit it's perhaps rather petty but I think it's so wrong to teach children to take delight in scaring animals even if it is just chasing them.

Rant over. And breathe.

No idea if I'm being unreasonable or not. Surely I can't be the only one who feels like this?

OP posts:
WarmAndSunny · 08/06/2013 18:23

I Agree it's a bit of a non issue. If my children did it, they would be told not too, but it's hardly the crime of the century. And if I overheard another parent telling their child "now, don't chase the ducks, only very naughty children chase ducks" [tidydancer] I would be very pissed at you saying my children were naughty, when your gripe would lie with my parenting. If anyone said that within my child's earshot, I would certainly say something rude back.

It's a little unkind, but they react on instinct and fly away. I am yet to see a duck drop dead from being chased. But I do agree it shouldn't be encouraged. I doubt chasing ducks makes a child a bully though. There are so many other ways that animals are abused, killed or treated everyday that are much more worthy of your anger OP.

mrsbugsywugsy · 08/06/2013 18:28

last week I was bfing my baby in the park, and attempting to eat a sandwich at the same time, and was being harassed by an aggressive seagull trying to steal my food out of my hand.

so I was quite pleased when a toddler very helpfully chased it off for me. if anything, I was worried that it might turn back and attack the toddler.

however , seagulls are evil.

GoshAnneGorilla · 08/06/2013 18:37

YANBU, it is vile and nasty.

Also, the ducks may seek revenge...

TidyDancer · 08/06/2013 18:39

Warmandsunny - if you'd read my post properly, you would see that I said it within earshot of the parent not the child. It is not a young child's fault if their parent has taught them something bad. If a parent said something rude, they would only be drawing attention to the fact that they allow their children to chase defenceless animals and that instead of stopping them, they choose to be rude to strangers.

I would judge a parent who allows it and doesn't stop it. There simply is no reason to allow it. It's horrible.

WarmAndSunny · 08/06/2013 18:44

Fair enough tidy, judge away if you find it makes the world a better place. Of all the things on the planet, I just find this something daft to get worked up over, let alone judge someone's entire parenting style based on one very small snippet of time that you happened to see. :)

Nanny0gg · 08/06/2013 18:49

I don't like it.
I don't like children who scream near animals in the zoo either.

It's not necessary. You wouldn't let them tease cats or dogs (unless you were stupid and asking for trouble) so I don't see why it's okay just because it's a duck.

TidyDancer · 08/06/2013 18:50

It's not daft, but then if you really can't see that after all the posts on this thread, I'm not going to rehash now.

I don't believe I ever stated I judged someone's 'entire parenting style' based on this....

WarmAndSunny · 08/06/2013 19:04

I do see other people's points. It's not about rehashing. People can believe different things. I just don't believe this filters into the depth of cruelty. Yes it isn't nice, and should be discouraged. This much I have agreed on. You have said twice your would judge a parent on allowing their child to do this. This is where I got you would be judging their parenting style, but obviously i was wrong, and you are just judging....this one action?? Anyway. We are debating a mute point. Because I agree people shouldn't do it. I just wouldn't get my knickers in a twist over it.

Binkybix · 08/06/2013 19:04

I really don't like to see this. No, it's not the end of the world and I'm sure the birds do get over it, but it just seems unnecessary and mean not to simply ask your child to stop doing it because it's unkind.

babybarrister · 08/06/2013 19:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Fairylea · 08/06/2013 19:20

Baby - I said in the original post, and further down, that I was feeding the ducks proper duck feed. Not bread.

I don't agree with chasing pigeons either. Regardless of whether they are considered to be vermin or not it is still just as unnecessary.

OP posts:
AmberSocks · 08/06/2013 19:36

have to say it doesnt bother me,not been to feed any ducks for ages so not sure if mine would do it,but if they did i wouldnt go off on one about it,they are only ducks,i dont care!

limitedperiodonly · 08/06/2013 19:45

I don't like children who scream near animals in the zoo either

Further to the swan I saw in St James's Park, I saw morons teasing a howler monkey at London Zoo once. It swung on its branch and directed a stream of piss with deadly aim. I suppose when you're a prisoner you take your revenge where you can.

limitedperiodonly · 08/06/2013 19:59

babybarrister Fair game for what?

I dislike pigeons with their scabrous missing feet and greasy feathers. One of them flew into the back of my head the other day that made me scratch for ages

Discourage them by not feeding, especially leaving food litter around. Scare them with hawks. Shoot or poison them if you must because they're vermin.

But I've seen people aim kicks at them and a couple of them connect. People like that worry me more than flying rats.

janey223 · 08/06/2013 20:07

DS runs after the pigeons trying to give them kisses Hmm

Fakebook · 08/06/2013 20:20

Fakebook - taking eggs isn't taking a chickens babies. Hens lay eggs regularly. Unless there is a cock available ( !) the egg won't be fertilised. It's just a "chicken period"!

Thanks for proving my point. It's a ridiculous thing I stated. Maybe just as ridiculous as the the notion that toddlers/small children chasing pigeons is cruel and the parents are teaching animal cruelty to their children by not stopping it.
I have a 5 year old who did the exact same thing when she was a toddler and she's grown up perfectly well; doesn't chase pigeons anymore, has never run after a cat or a dog and would never scream at animals in a zoo.

This is probably the most ridiculous thing that I've found people will judge you for! At least the pigeons and birds are free to fly off and have the whole world to fly in as they wish. Their wings haven't been cut off to stop them flying; that is real cruelty.

Original poster
Fairylea · 08/06/2013 20:21

Saying it's ok for dc to chase pigeons because they are vermin is a bit like saying fox hunting is acceptable because foxes are vermin.

There are better ways of controlling vermin than being chased by a child or a pack of dogs. Of course the pigeons won't be killed by the dc chasing them, but it's still unnecessary and there is no reason why any parent can't call out to their child to explain that they shouldn't do it.

It's not going to solve the problem of pigeons by allowing children to chase after them... it's not like it actually makes them change the areas they live in. It's just letting the children think it's ok to behave like that.

OP posts:
jamdonut · 08/06/2013 21:10

My daughter(16) is scared of birds,and when kids run through them making hem flap about she has a fit of the screaming ab-dabs. It is not fair.

OhYouBadBadKitten · 08/06/2013 21:13

It's not a non issue, it's about teaching respect for all living things. Teasing animals because it seems fun is not a nice thing to do.

InNeedOfBrandy · 08/06/2013 21:20

ducks no pigeons yes IMO horrible flying rats that need to be shot.

blondefriend · 08/06/2013 21:22

In the circumstance you describe you ANBU. They're ducks that struggle to take off easily, it's nesting season so many will have youngsters and it is antisocial as you were feeding the ducks and the older children were disturbing you and your family.
I also see there is a big difference between 9 year olds and toddlers chasing birds. My 2 year old will hand feed ducks, geese and swans gently and carefully but still has a bit of fun chasing pigeons in the town centre. He isn't putting his full speed into it, he just likes toddling after them. They don't even take off so I'm not convinced they're being terrorised to be honest.

Oblomov · 08/06/2013 21:32

Ds2 always chases pigeons in the town centre, when we go. I did not realise that this was a no-no. Dh calls them 'flying rats, (only to me, does not repeat this to the boys) and considers them vermin.

CloudsAndTrees · 08/06/2013 21:50

I wouldn't let my dc run through ducks, they don't seem agile enough for it to be fair game.

But there is no way I would deny my children the simple childhood pleasure that is running through pigeons when we go to Trafalgar Square! I tell them they can't do it all the time, so we just do it with the hardcore London pigeons, and I tell them not to run too fast or aggressively. I do think I've sent the message not to be cruel, but there's no getting away from the fact that jogging into a huge group of pigeons is a lot of fun.

LittleBearPad · 08/06/2013 21:55

Not for the people the pigeons then fly into and at... Why is it ok to do it to London pigeons. They have a shitty enough life as it is.

ExitPursuedByABear · 08/06/2013 22:00

I hate it when children chase birds.