About going to this wedding reception

[jinglymum]

So I have been with my partner for around 8 months now, about 2 months ago he mentioned about going to this wedding reception for some of his friends who had been married abroad who were having a reception back home for those who did not attend. He went to the stag weekend but not to the actual wedding, however was invited.

Anyway fast forward to last night and I ask what the plans are for the reception which is today, he says well I will have to meet you there...... I said why, he explained he and a few of his friends had said they would be arriving at 8, the groom apparently wasn't pleased with this and wanted them there for when it started at 7, but said plus ones would not be able to attend until 8pm!

Aibu to say I don't want to arrive on my own when I know no one there apart from my partner, but also think its pretty rude to expect the people on the invite to arrive at a separate time to their 'plus one'?

Well, it is a bit strange, but is it really such a big deal? Just meet him there an hour later and use the extra hour at home to drink a glass of wine for some dutch courage.

I wouldn't feel uncomfortable turning up at 8 rather than 7.

It could be logistically difficult if it's a place that you have to drive to, for example.

I do think it sounds like an odd arrangement to require different arrival times without explaining why.

Sounds like, if the wedding was abroad and they've just come back, that maybe the groom wants a bit of time with his friends just to celebrate privately- i don't think that's rude if it's very local but if the venue if very far away then I understand why it would be annoying. Why don't you give him the hour and call him when you are on your way/outside and get him to come out to meet you?

I did this when i went to an evening reception to met my partner and didn't know anyone else. I called him when five minutes away and he came outside to meet me.

ENormaSnob, from the looks of things the wedding was abroad and he was invited but couldn't/wouldn't attend.

It sounds like the groom wants a drink with his friends before everyone 'couples off'. Which is absolutely fine and understandable, but he must accept that if he chooses to not invite plus ones until later, some of his friends may well choose to come later too, defeating the whole purpose of the arrangement.

If that's the case though-why not just say?

And of course as a pp said, depending on how far away everyone is, it might not be all that doable for couples to arrive separately.

Could it be that they are opening the buffet at 7pm for close guests only because they don't want to feed everybody BUT want a PRESENT from EVERYBODY?

OP I wouldn't be miffed about that at all. Maybe the males have something planned. In a nice way?

I am guessing that groom wants to buy drinks for his friends but is too tight to buy them for his friends' partners.

BTW OP your DP sounds like a very decent person by paying attention to your feelings on this.