Radio 1 Disgusting!

[Popsie3]

I was listening to an interview on Radio 1 this morning when the host said 'I thought my dancing was good', cue lots of laughter and the person being interviewed said 'Yeah if you're epileptic' AIBU that this has made me so angry all day! Am I being over sensitive? I just don't think it's funny one bit?

You could direct me to that yes but when my 2 year old son is having 10+ seizures a day I find jokes like these offensive, maybe I am being a little over sensitive I just wondered if I was being completely unreasonable

4 year old son sorry!

I heard this, and also the comments about French people and thought it was a bit close to the bone but despite having a French dh and therefore half French dds I wouldn't say I was offended...particularly as the guest (who I've never heard of anyway!) was clearly an idiot who later admitted that he only just realised that lambs were baby sheep , and Grimmy apologised straight afterwards, to be fair. What guests say is out of their control really.

I'm more offended that a grown man didn't know lambs were baby sheep1

Really, angry ALL day?

Yep

In which case you are certainly allowed to be sensitive (10+ seizures a day sounds bloody horrible - your poor DS). But it might still help to take a step back and remember that the real loser here is Nick Grimshaw who cannot dance, or even host a radio show despite that being his actual factual job, not your son.

I hope your son gets some relief with meds/diet/something awesome soon. Hang on in there...

Popsie -I might be more protective of my child than myself :)

I hope they can settle the epilepsy. Is it possible that the anger you feel is misdirected and more about your anger at your son's situation?

I have epilepsy. I fucking detest being referred to as my "disability". You wouldn't describe someone with cancer as a "canceritic", would you?

Fair enough Fuckedoff. I hate being referred to as a 'person with epilepsy'. I find it patronising. My seizures are well-controlled so 90% of what makes my epilepsy disabling isn't to do with me but to do with other peoples expectations about what I can and can't do and the social rules that go with it. Let's face it if you're an adult with epilepsy, if you mainly have it under control with meds the number one thing that is exasperating about it is not being to drive.

So I'd subscribe to a view that says I'm not ill but I am disabled by other people's expectations of me. In that sense I'm epileptic because that is a social role I have to play like it or not. In the same way that physically disabled people are disabled by the fact that physical environments simply are not adapted to accommodate them, not by the fact that they have cerebral palsy or MND or whatever.

Which does not mean you are wrong to feel the way you do. We are entitled to ask to be described in the way which best matches our experience. But it would be wrong to say the word 'epileptic' should always be termed offensive because a lot of us find it fits our experience better than 'person with epilepsy'.

No, but you might say diabetic, or asthmatic.

It's quite an interesting point though. As health professionals we were advised some time ago that it was inappropriate to call people with diabetes "diabetic", as in "mrs jones, a 51 year old diabetic", you must say "mrs jones a 51 year old person with diabetes". Most patients say what a crock, I have diabetes I'm diabetic, makes no odds which way you refer to me! Guess its horses for courses.

And Popsie, I'm sorry your son is having such a difficult time with his epilepsy at the minute. I do hope it is sorted soon for you all.

There needs to be a Radio 1.5 for those of us who are not twenty year old ravers nor baby boomers who want to relive the 70's. Gen X and Y are left out!

Actually, most health charities refer to "people with such-and-such conditions, not "condition-etics". The condition is diabetic/epileptic/asthmatic etc, and people have the condition.

People aren't their conditions, and if my "disability" is my defining characteristic as far as other people are concerned, well, fuck you, frankly.

Really?

Really. Not you personally, obvs, but people generally. It's insulting to reduce someone to a characteristic they can't help. Reductivism is insulting, and referring to a group of people by their shared disability is appalling.

Particularly in a mocking context, such as mentioned by the OP.

YABalittlebitU. It is not disgusting - that is way OTT. It's not really a joking matter though tbh.

It isn't uncommon to shout at a friend who is dancing "quick he's having a fit", in the local pubs i've been in, it's funny at the time, but no medical condition is mentioned.

It isn't ideal to be so specific and mention a condition, on the radio or television.

I'm visually impaired, and I make jokes about it all the time - if I didn't, I'd cry with frustration some days at not being able to drive.

But it's a very individual thing, humour, and I think that people need to be careful about what jokes they make in public, and especially on RV and radio.

So, YAB a little bit U, but obviously with what you're going through at the minute, you will be more sensitive to jokes about it, which is understandable.

"People aren't their conditions, and if my "disability" is my defining characteristic as far as other people are concerned, well, fuck you, frankly."

Cheers.

Is it really hard to understand that two people with the same condition might feel very different about the use of language and that neither of us therefore gets to say one term is right. I am not saying it would be appropriate to call you epileptic. Absolutely not. You find it offensive and I want to avoid causing you offence.

I am only saying it is wrong to call me a person with epilepsy because frankly I find that as patronising as all fuck. Patient with epilepsy is what gets written on my medical records. It certainly isn't how I identify myself in day-to-day life. I'm also an academic, not a person with a PhD who happens to work in a university doing research and teaching stuff. I'm a woman not a person with two X chromosomes. I'm straight not a person with a heterosexual orientation. I'm white not a person of white British/Irish origin. If I can cope with identifying with all those adjectives I can handle epileptic without my social identity fracturing into a million tiny pieces. I have never met anyone who defines me purely as epileptic.

I have epilepsy. I am not in the least offended by the joke on Radio 1, and also regularly refer to myself as epileptic.
There are far more important things to get riled about. Remember the old saying that offence is taken not given.

I once sat on the disability awareness steering committee of the local hospital. We had members with disabilities and a lot of the above issues regarding definitions came out as did the following scenario
Person A - Furious if someone approached and offered to help them in any way in recognition of their disability
Person B - Furious if no one came forward and offered to help them because 'can't they see I'm disabled'

You really cannot meet the needs of any group of people. I would like epilepsy to be discussed freely and life for me includes humour. Therefore epilepsy is part of that. I suspect tolerance is related to a number of things including recent onset, impact on your life, intention and care of the person saying it and perceived ideas about what is acceptable.

I'd hate the last one to control things