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AIBU?

to change driving instructor?

41 replies

Youcanringmybell · 06/06/2013 14:56

All these threads about driving today...

I am on my 7th lesson and I made great progress initially but my last lesson went terribly. My instructor is of the mind that it is best to say very little to me in the way of guidance and let me get on with it.

Surprise surprise when I get things wrong he will seem frustrated with me and laugh with his frustration. These things include:

I may slow down at a roundabout too much because I do not yet have the experience to know if I have the time to pull out.

2. I may not drive to the full speed limit.
3. Occasional stalling at a junction where I have only had to stop briefly and I am not quite 'quick' enough with my feet yet.

I am getting WORSE not better because I spend most of my time panicking about what he is thinking/ saying and because he thinks I know things that I do not

I am not confident and I have told him this.

I am thinking of changing instructors...AIBU?? Or is he doing what he is supposed to in kind of 'forcing' me into pressure to make me deal with it.

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Youcanringmybell · 07/06/2013 06:55

OMG - My instructor was a different man tonight! So much nicer and supportive
He talked me through everything, lots of praise and told me I was like a different driver (coincidence - I think NOT!).

I actually had a near perfect drive. I actually enjoyed myself a bit tonight and felt safe and that he was in control of me, iyswim.

Thanks so much though - I do have the confidence to move to another instructor though. If last night is a one off and we revert back to the other style of teaching I am off!

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valiumredhead · 07/06/2013 08:50

Use up your lessons and then decide. It is quite common for you to have a setback and think you are getting nowhere and then suddenly it clicks.

I'm not even going to tell you how many instructors I had, some of them were appalling! The one I passed with was fantastic.

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valiumredhead · 07/06/2013 08:50

Use up your lessons and then decide. It is quite common for you to have a setback and think you are getting nowhere and then suddenly it clicks.

I'm not even going to tell you how many instructors I had, some of them were appalling! The one I passed with was fantastic.

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valiumredhead · 07/06/2013 08:50

Sorry x posted!

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Youcanringmybell · 07/06/2013 12:45

Thanks valium
Sounds like you know your stuff in this department

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valiumredhead · 07/06/2013 15:44

Ooo I posted twice, sorry

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SueDoku · 07/06/2013 16:23

It took me nearly a year to learn to drive - I was in my 30s - even with the most patient instructor in the world, so don't despair. I can remember coming home and sitting on the stairs crying because I couldn't understand why I found it so difficult... And then, just as valium said, it 'clicked' - I passed my test first time and have driven hundreds of thousands of miles over the last 30 years - you'll get there, just don't beat yourself up about it..!

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melika · 07/06/2013 16:54

YANBU I changed after failing 1st test, he told me I was ready. I wasn't.

I got a well recommended lady instructor who got me through, she was always instructing me and telling where I was going wrong. Your instructor sounds lazy and if you don't like it, change.

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mamma12 · 09/06/2013 19:15

He is a dickhead. Change and don't look back. I had a terrible driving instructor who used to turn up late and then just get me to drive around doing errands for him. I really debated whether to change and since I did I hever looked back. Book one last 2 hour lesson with him and give him the elbow quick time. I've now got a woman instructor recommended by a friend and she is BRILLIANT I wish I'd got rid of him sooner. so ask around and if the next one is rubbish keep searching :)

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FunkyNails · 09/06/2013 22:59

YANBU I had 5 instructors instructor one only taught me to turn left very patronising like I was some daft wee girl, instructor two was great but took unwell and had to give up teaching, instructor three ex army instructor shouted at me after 15min I told him to take me home, instructor four told me I argued too much and that I might be better suited with someone else instructor five was awesome passed first time. At the end of the day you are paying them to teach you so you have to be comfortable with their teaching style you are in a confined space and learning to drive is an expensive business. If you had bought a dress you weren't happy would you wouldn't think twice about returning it? See this as an investment to your future your paying for a service make sure you get one your happy with and its value for money if you leave feeling stresses and bothered how much have you learned. Twhe instructor won't take it personally I'm sure they have all gained and lost clients through these circumstances before. Good luck with your lessons and don't let this get you down I know how frustrating learning is but you will get there honest.

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Betrayedbutsurvived · 09/06/2013 23:10

I failed my test five times, went through numerous instructors, finally found the right one and passed on my first attempt. Definitely change instructors, you should be looking forward to your lessons, not dreading them.

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cat128 · 28/08/2013 16:30

I have had 7 lessons so far and the last 2 have been terrible I couldn't do a thing right! Decided to try a different instructor and had a 2 hour lesson with him today for first time, he was very negative about my capabilities and I am not sure I want to go to my next lesson with him next week. Feel very disillusioned with it all,why am I finding it so difficult , I struggle with the steering wheel still, not sure how far I should turn it as I round a bend.My husband has been driving for donkeys years and when I tell him how I feel he says I have a defeatist attitude :( . Maybe a patient lady instructor would help me,i am learning automatic though and lady instructors are hard to find in this are. I am a bag of nerves before each lesson.

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GiveItYourBestShot · 28/08/2013 18:09

It took me ages to get the hang of steering, cat - you're not alone!

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Imnotaslimjim · 28/08/2013 18:21

Cat I totally understand what you mean about knowing how far to turn the wheel, the thought terrified me! I wa constantly thinking - I don't know how hard to press the gas, or the brake, or how far to turn! What I have found is if you watch the road ahead rather than what you're travelling on immediately in front, you naturally turn the bend hard enough to make it. I can't explain why, you just do! And if you feel you've messed up, slow down and steer further into the bend and you'll pull it right

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DaBump · 28/08/2013 18:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Thepowerof3 · 28/08/2013 18:54

I loved my 4th too!

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