AIBU to wish my Mum was a dog?

[Regbooboo]

My poor old Mum has had enough. She's 89 years old and suffers with Alzheimers and lives in a care home. She has absolutely no quality of life at all ... she hardly eats or drinks, she doesn't read the papers or watch TV, she can hardly walk to the toilet. She's had four admissions to hospital since last November suffering with pneumonia (which the doctor suspects could be lung cancer). They do their best - pumping her full of anti-biotics and saline and then send her back to the home after 3 or 4 days. She gets so upset as she doesn't know where she is and then finds it difficult settling back in the home. I love her so much but honestly if she were a sick dog I would have her put down. Feel so upset that her life is ending this way as she has been such a good woman all her life and her life has never been easy. So so sad.

and a big hug.

I am so sorry.

It is cruel, we are going to have to change the way we view the end of life soon as a society I think.

The average person was never meant to live so long (obviously there are outliers who get to these ages and they are still fit and well).

So very sorry.

Hugs & for you both.

Alzheimers is indeed a cruel trick that old age plays on people.

It not only makes the sufferer suffer but the people who care about them too. You lose the person you love while they are still alive.

Oh my word you poor thing. Watching someone you love so much suffer is beyond comprehension isn't it?

I remember at the end of my brother's battle with cancer, just hoping he would go quickly so we didn't have to watch him suffer. Watching someone battle with a terminal illness is traumatic beyond belief and it really does haunt us.

I know there is nothing any of us can do, just want you to know there are lots of us who understand and feel your pain

Thanks for all your kind wishes. I just hope that if there is a God he will take pity on her and let her join her husband and son in heaven and hopefully one day we will all be together again - it's this thought that keeps me going at the moment.

No you are not unreasonable at all.
I am in a similar situation.
My mum had a massive stroke four years ago and I wish that the medics had just let her go at the time.
My mum has no quality of life, she is essentially in a vegetative state - paralysed, incapable of speech, fed by a tube, in nappies because she is incontinent and confined to a bed in a care home where she is periodically turned to prevent bed sores.
It is an existence not a life, she has no recognition of visitors or anything around her I often wish she could be relieved of it all.
It's so very hard on all of the family too as we all remember how vibrant and active she was and it's heartbreaking.
Sometimes I feel very selfish about wishing it could all be over for her and for us, but none of us can move on or grieve properly for who she was as things stand.
I appreciate that euthanasia is a very emotive subject, but my mum is an empty shell and is also currently costing the state a fortune for her care. I often ask myself what exactly is the point of it all.

So sorry op and other posters.

Horrible and cruel situations.

So so sorry heartbreaking. Agree with Morloth.

My mother is terrified of this, having seen her mother with Alzheimer's. She's got a clause in her will about not being kept alive by artificial means, but it doesn't seem "artificial means" is clear-cut - unlikely there will be a respirator to be turned off, more like IV feeding - so I fear her "provision" will be meaningless.

So sorry and to all those in this very sad situation.

I am so, so sorry. Of course she does not deserve to go through this. And I agree with Morloth that our cultural beliefs and practices have not caught up to the realities of how long most people live now. It feels terrible to say this, but I hope that your mother and 80sbabe's mother are both released from all this soon.

No yanbu. My died in December fro dementia.he was diagnosed for 5 years. The truly awful bit was short lived in our case, he deteriorated very suddenly in September and went into hospital and died about 10 weeks later. Every day and every visit was like wading through treacle. I was grateful to him for letting go when he did. I had other mountains to climb and he let me do that. I don't think I have really processed what happened yet, but I still feel relief he has gone. I hope it doesn't carry on too much longer for you.