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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think dh can make his own bloody dinner?

21 replies

Ashoething · 30/05/2013 19:06

I am a sahm to 3 young dcs.Dh works.I cook dinner every single night.At the moment we are having work done in the house including a whole new bathroom. Our house is tiny and we only have 1 toilet.I have been trying to keep dcs out of house as much as possible and to this end decided to get a chippy tea.Dh now has a narky face and said he doesnt want "old" chips for his dinner.Aibu to think he is a fucking twat who can make his own dinner from now on?

OP posts:

SweetSeraphim · 30/05/2013 19:07

Couldn't agree more. How rude.

Original poster

Ashoething · 30/05/2013 19:11

The chippy was only purchased an hour ago so hardly "old" either.I am fuming and pointed out to him that noone is forcing him to eat it.

OP posts:

HappyAsASandboy · 30/05/2013 19:12

The strength of feeling might be a bit OTT, but you're right that he can eat the 'old' chips or make something else himself.

In my house I will make DH something if I make myself something more than soup and toast. If I have soup and toast or nothing, then DH makes his own or doesn't eat. If I make dinner then he reheats it when he gets in.

Basically, I wouldn't make myself dinner without making him some too, but DHs are not supposed to make extra work, so he only gets a dinner made if I'm making one for me anyway.

DCs get fed every night, before anyone asks! It's just that they have their main meal at lunchtime, so have scrambled eggs on toast or similar for their tea.

StuntGirl · 30/05/2013 19:15

Jeez, I'd be deliriously happy if I came home to a chippy tea!

Original poster

Ashoething · 30/05/2013 19:18

It wasnt just "old" chips-was a sausage supper.I also bought a pack of cider.I am now drinking the cider.

OP posts:

Original poster

Ashoething · 30/05/2013 19:29

Well he appears to have eaten the offending chippy tea and is now moaning about the bathroom.Would I be unreasonable to tell him.to fuck.the fuck off.He expects me to sit in all day with no toilet to supervise the workmen.Aye right.

OP posts:

DiscoDonkey · 30/05/2013 19:32

Personally I would hate heated up sausage and chips from the chip shop. Would rather be told to pick my own up on the way home.

peggotty · 30/05/2013 19:33

So is he normally a moany bastard?

SweetSeraphim · 30/05/2013 19:51

Is he often like this? What would happen if you told him he was a miserable shit?

Original poster

Ashoething · 30/05/2013 19:58

Yes is indicitive of our relationship in that he treats me like a skivvy.literally.He had left skid marks on toilet and I purposely didnt clean it and he was really arsey about it.

OP posts:

peggotty · 30/05/2013 20:08

What do you want to do about it then? Do you think he would change?

SweetSeraphim · 30/05/2013 20:11

Right. Here is what I would do.

Pick a time that you can be alone to talk. Sit him down and MAKE him listen to you. Tell him that you are not his servant, and that chores in the house are to be shared. That you don't clean up another adults shit, and just because you are a sahm, this doesn't mean that you're there to skivvy after him.

If he gets angry, leave him to it. He'll still think about what you've said, even if he doesn't admit it.

Just don't put up with it, OP. Life really is too short.

Original poster

Ashoething · 30/05/2013 20:22

I know you are right but I am sat here feeling like shit now-excuse the pun-because he has been a mardy arse.Plus I know he will be a moany twat tomorrow as he is not happy with the work thats been done and expects me to sort it.

OP posts:

SweetSeraphim · 30/05/2013 20:40

So what are you going to do then?

Crunchymunchyhoneycakes · 30/05/2013 20:44

He doesn't think he should have to clean his own skid marks off the toilet? What an absolute dick.

EhricLovesTeamQhuay · 30/05/2013 20:45

He was arsey with you for not cleaning up his shit?!?! What?

MissStrawberry · 30/05/2013 20:46

Do not allow him to make you feel like shit.

He takes you for granted as he has had the life of riley and you have done everything for him. You are his wife, not his unpaid servant so you need to talk to him.

If he can't pour bleach down the loo, or thinks it isn't his job too, then you have bigger problems than having to make another tea.

ChablisLover · 30/05/2013 20:49

Yanbu - would love to have come home to sausage supper and cider!

If he's so worried about the workmen, tell him to take the time off to supervise them

And it's manners to clean up your own skid marks. Even my dh ( who is a lazy so and so does that!)

DreamingOfTheMaldives · 30/05/2013 20:59

I wouldn't be impressed if someone bought me sausage and chips an hour before I was home to eat them, I'd rather you told me to get something myself on the way home. That said, he does sound like a moany arse and that he treats you like his servant. I'm not surprised you're fed up OP.

Think he needs a serious metaphorical kick up the arse!

spanky2 · 30/05/2013 21:08

I would reheat it in the oven . I would like that for tea. He doesn't need to be rude about it. My dh told me "Well with what have you done all day?" I told him "obviously not any housework ! " Then glared at him. I think they get used to a certain level of care.

StuntGirl · 30/05/2013 21:10

He sounds vile OP. What would you like to happen?

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