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AIBU?

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To have told this woman to mind her own business

7 replies

ProudAS · 29/05/2013 12:43

I was watching a pair of local swans with their babies. A woman came along with her children and told them out loud to keep away from the swans as they were dangerous that I was being stupid for standing where I was (a few feet from one of the adults and further from the cygnets). I asked her not to call me stupid and she retorted that the swans were dangerous. I pointed out that I knew what I was doing and didn't appreciate being called stupid and she walked off in a huff without an apology.

I have a lot of experience of being around swans in general and this pair in particular. If I get closer than the adult birds would like they will warn me by hissing (which they were not doing). They are powerful but will only attack as a last resort and I was keeping a close eye on them and ready to brace myself.

Whilst this woman wouldn't have known that I was well accustomed to the birds she I don't think she had any business to make a judgement about a total stranger without knowing the facts.

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HollyBerryBush · 29/05/2013 12:47

The thing about being a parent is: you often see adults doing "stupid" things and have to explain why an adult can be stupid but a child cannot

You of course were not "stupid" but if her children had run up to a pair of swans, they would indeed be "stupid" for doing so.

As you didn't have a placard on your back with all your credentials in swan-wifery, then she assumed you were indeed "stupid"

But she was rude to loud parent in your earshot.

arethereanyleftatall · 29/05/2013 12:51

It would have come across as rude to you, but I guess what she was trying to do was to warn her children not to do it.
Not really directed at you IYSWIM.
It's the same at the green man at a traffic lights. I never know how to tell my children why adults are walking across when it's red.

ProudAS · 29/05/2013 12:54

Of course she had to say something to the children but surely it could have been put in a more appropriate manner.

When I was the children's age I knew that there were certain things adults could do that I couldn't (e.g. use the cooker). I was never told that grown ups were stupid for handling hot water, crossing the road without someone to hold their hand etc.

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5Foot5 · 29/05/2013 12:54

She may have been tactless and a bit rude to put it like she did but I think previous posters may be correct, she didn't want her children going so close.

I personally am very nervous of large birds like swans and would not have wanted my small child, or any children I was responsible for, to go near. Not least because if the swan did go for the I would have to interven and the thought terrifies me!

ProudAS · 29/05/2013 12:56

arethereanyleftatall maybe I'm a stickler for the rules but as a child I never crossed the road when the red man was lit. I do now though.

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honeytea · 29/05/2013 13:05

Unless you were in some way checking up on the swans I think it was stupid to stand so close to them. It isn't fair for the swans to have lots of people disturbing them especially when they have babies.

ProudAS · 29/05/2013 13:54

What makes you think I was standing too close to them honeytea? They would have let me know if I was and BTW yes I was checking on them.

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