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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think its perfectly do-able to live in a first floor flat with a baby?

71 replies

annabanana84 · 28/05/2013 11:15

DP and I have the home of our very humble dreams. Its large and airy, and we live above a shop, so dont have to worry as such about the potential of upsetting tenants below with noise.

Dp and I have decided that we would like to start ttc. Yippee! However, my mother has recently expressed her concern that it would be a great struggle to live in a first floor flat with a baby with regards to the stairs (which are outside stairs iyswim) etc, but people do it all the time, dont they, and I can always take baby up first, put him/her in bouncy chair while I go back down for pram (coz dp will be at work most of the time when I take dc out in the day). I know its a silly concern really, but I want to plan properly.

OP posts:

Bejeena · 28/05/2013 11:42

It is totally doable where we live here in Germany it is also unknown to even think that you cannot bring up a baby/child in a flat.

Or course a house with garden might be better but it is still no way undoable.

We live on second floor and no plans to move.

DorothyMantooth · 28/05/2013 11:43

Not ideal but totally do-able. I have a 9 week old and live in a 2nd floor flat with one set of stairs outside and one inside our front door. I have an iCandy Cherry as I really wanted to have a carrycot where baby could lie completely flat. I get into the house in stages - bring carrycot with baby up to the first level and put her inside the front door, then bring up the rest. It does make it a bit of a pain to get in and out, but if I'm just popping out for a short trip I take baby in the BabyBjorn. Don't let your mum put you off ttc! It is very exciting but I was quite superstitious about telling people what we were up to (even parents) - last thing you want if it takes you a little longer than you expected is people continuously asking if you're pregnant! Good luck with everything.

DewDr0p · 28/05/2013 11:45

Do you have a car OP? If so it would probably be easier to store the pram in the boot - lots of my friends do that anyway, even with a house unless the hall is quite spacious it might not be practical to keep a pram inside.

Good luck with ttc

ihearsounds · 28/05/2013 11:47

I live on the 3rd floor. Bought a light, easy foldable pram that could be done with one hand. Carried bubs and pram together.. it is very doable, and there was no way was i making extra trips up and down

ChunkyPickle · 28/05/2013 11:50

Of course it's doable - people manage to live in houses with stairs, so having the stairs outside the house doesn't make any difference!

We live in a bungalow, but I still have to transport the toddler into the house if he falls asleep in the car, leave him there, then go and park the car in the garage (in a block, not attached to the house) as I can't get him out of the car whilst it's in the garage, and I can't leave the car parked anywhere else.

No garden is totally fine - especially when a baby - it's not like there's a shortage of parks in this country.

somewherewest · 28/05/2013 13:49

Its perfectly doable with a baby, although we were lucky in having a big communal hallway downstairs to stash the pram in. We knew another couple who didn't have a hallway but used to stash the pram in the boot of their car. We did move to a small house just before our son turned one and the garden has been a life saver. I think we'd have gone a bit crazy with an active toddler in our old flat.

PS You'll laugh at this now but it would also be very easy to bring the baby upstairs, absentmindedly pull the door closed to go back down for the shopping or whatever and then realise you'd locked yourself out. Unless you get a wonder sleeper your brain will be like cottage cheese for at least the first three months .

MrsTerryPratchett · 28/05/2013 13:53

I lived in a flat in London for years with lots of families. If people didn't live in flats only millionaires would have babies in the big smoke.

patienceisvirtuous · 28/05/2013 14:00

This will be me too in six months (plan to start ttc then). I live in a first-floor apt (three flights of stairs). I get lots of comments of the ilk "you'll have to move from here if you want a family with those stairs".

Er no I won't :o

As it happens I have my flat on the market, but I'm not optimistic it will sell quickly.

I'm sure you'll be fine OP.

BlatantRedhead · 28/05/2013 14:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

frissonpink · 28/05/2013 14:07

Totally do-able.

We live in a third floor apartment (no lift)

Pram lives in the car.

The only pain is the food shopping. Have to do it when myself and DH available. Really wouldn't like to leave a baby on their own where you can't hear them!

HopALongMcLimpyLegs · 28/05/2013 14:12

Get a good sling, chuck baby up on your back, lug shopping up and down. It'll be fine, millions of people live in flats with children all across the world.

I would miss out garden purely because I chuck DS out into it when I need him to not be under my feet for 10 minutes, but you would cope without it, you just do really. Plus, nearly 10 months pregnant, and then another year before walking, and a few more months till walking properly outside, you never know where you might be. So go for it!

Nicolaeus · 28/05/2013 14:16

Totally doable. I lived on the 6th floor (no lift) until DS was 4 months, and even then we only moved because it was a small, one-bed flat.

A garden is not an essential for having children. Nice, yes. But totally doable without. Paris is full of children being raised in flats (and playing in the local parks) and none of them are suffering for it.

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 28/05/2013 14:17

Course it's do-able. People get their knickers in such a twist about flats/no gardens/God knows what else.

Tailtwister · 28/05/2013 14:19

I don't think living in a flat would be a problem at all. Where I come from most of the accommodation is in the form of flats and loads of families live in them. A sling is a good idea as is a foldable pushchair.

caseycartwright · 28/05/2013 14:25

We were in a second floor, one bed flat when we had ds1. It was in such a great area, with a nice walk to the local Common, I just didn't want to leave.

I had a big, heavy pram too! I used to just lift him still in his carry cot and take him upstairs and then go back down for the chassis. I also used to hang out the terry nappies in the communal garden.

We didn't move until he was 1, at which point we wanted him to have his own room and live in a house with a garden. I have such fond memories of that flat!

Polyethyl · 28/05/2013 14:34

I'm in a 2nd fl flat. I was astonished how many people gave me the benefit of their unasked opinion when I was pregnant, with them assuming that I'd move to a house.

We bought a sling instead of a pram. She's now 4 mo and we're very happy. A sling is so much less hassle than a pram when you are trotting up and down stairs.

Liveinthepresent · 28/05/2013 14:44

A slight tangent I live in a 3 bedroom house - and still have had some quite strong opinions from family and colleagues about how will we manage with 2 DCs..
People can't help themselves sometimes.
Go for it - it is very exciting !

messybedhead · 28/05/2013 14:44

When DD was born we lived on the 3rd floor (no lift) but I loved it there as it was in one of the nicest areas of London. It was a pain with shopping and things but I used to leave pram downstairs.

When DD was 1 we moved to a flat on the 15th floor. This was my favourite place that I have lived in. The lift only stopped at even floors so I would get off at the 16th and bump the pushchair down a flight of stairs. This was easier as we could then wheel pushchair into the flat with a sleeping baby.

When I finally moved to a 2 bed house with the much coveted garden, my then new baby (DS) used to wake up as soon as I opened our gate so there was never any chance of him staying asleep even though we had no flights of stairs to go up.

I am back living in a flat now! Discovered I wasn't very green fingered and my DC play out the front instead.

Sunnysummer · 28/05/2013 14:49

I do it! We use the sling a lot - it's worth investing in a sturdy one as well as a fabric one, we use our moby a lot at home but for long walks and shopping we very quickly bought an Ergobaby Performance, which DH and I much prefer. We also love our Babyjogger City Mini pram, as it folds up and carries so easily, and also has an easily detached bassinet that can be carried up and down separately if you need it.

We do miss having our own garden a little, but for most of the year it wouldn't be that usable anyway.

It works fine for us with a newborn but we had been wondering about a few years time, so it's good to see other opinions - thank you for staring the topic!

CloudsAndTrees · 28/05/2013 15:19

I'm another that lived in a flat for the first 18 months of my child's life. It was fine.

A garden become desirable as they get old enough to play in the garden on their own, but for the first couple of years accompanying then into the garden isn't really much different to accompanying them to the park.

Peevish · 28/05/2013 15:25

I did it in London for my baby's first year. The reason we ended up moving was because the flat was far too small, not because of it being on the first floor. It was fine, though I recommend getting a light pushchair (or slinging, as others have said). Also, I second the comment about taking precautions about not locking yourself out/ baby in, as it's so easily done.

But yes, people can be very strange about the Total Necessity for a House when you have a baby...

kalidasa · 28/05/2013 15:30

Our flat is on the second floor - but sort of third as there's quite a steep set of steps up to the front door as well. It's a faff but it's completely doable. We are lucky in that we can leave the pram in the hall, but we still have to get it up the front steps. It is worth selecting your pram/buggy carefully though and checking how heavy it is, how easy it is to fold etc. It was actually worst during pregnancy as I had v. severe SPD and couldn't walk at all at the end, the stairs were a nightmare. We allowed a full fifteen minutes to get down them to the taxi when I went into labour!

Not sure I could manage it with a baby and a toddler though - you'd constantly have to choose which to leave unattended for a moment! So I think we'll have to move if we have another one.

Hummuschocolate · 28/05/2013 17:36

I'm sure its do-able, lots of people have babies in flats, don't they?

megsmouse · 28/05/2013 19:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Amandaclarke · 28/05/2013 19:47

Of course it's doable - what a ridiculous suggestion to say otherwise . We lived in a third floor flat with no lift until my daughter was 3.5. No lift, no storage for pram (that stayed in the car), no garden and no online shopping - I never even considered it a problem until I read this thread....thinking about it no wonder I was so much slimmer in those days!!

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