To ask how one weaves lentils exactly?

[pinkballetflats]

Seeing as I lean more to the left more than 50% of the time I feel I should know how to do this. I had a good look at a packet of lentils in my kitchen and thought maybe if one partially softens them and then runs them into lots of long chains using microfilament and then puts them to re-dry on the radiator...I'd have semi-flexible lengths of connected lentils with which to weave...

Would that be the right way to go about it?

fuck angels and their tears, badbride

If you have any spare yoghurt you can use it to felt a troublesome yoni.

Had to google yoni and then "felted yoni", am now not only enlightened but have borne witness to ACTUAL felt yonies (unsure if that's the correct plural) on etsy. Divine!

I'm definitely starting up a yoni weaving business. Although in the spirit of weavery I would have to give them away for free. So more a yoni weaving charity, I guess.

"My yoni seems to self-felt"
Hahahahaha!! Thank you Waffly, you've cheered me right up.

I sun-dry the lentils and then weave them into my yoni-topiary for a natural wind-chime effect as I walk. Does everyone not do this?

Actual laugh out loud moment for ThreeBeeOneGee's wind-chime effect yoni.

Do you tinkle when you walk then?

Fortunately I don't tinkle while I walk, but only because I keep my yoni in good shape.

And... squeeze!

Oh this is hilarious :)

I want to felt lentils in yard at full moon with a bubble wrap and yoni method... If 'reclaimed bubble wrap' can be used that is. My neighbours and flats upstairs will love the sight and may be inspired to join in... I could start a felting love in :)

And I just googled felted yoni and came across a very badly written story

Golly, those yoni earrings on Etsy are a must buy! We should alert Style and Beauty.
I they did BOGOF on these I would wear them as slippers. My postman would love me

If-I
www.etsy.com/uk/listing/112456348/yoni-vagina-vulva-puppetpillow-say-hello?ref=sr_gallery_6&ga_includes%5B0%5D=tags&ga_search_query=vulva+vagina+yoni&ga_page=2&ga_search_type=all&ga_facet=handmadevulva+vagina+yoni&ga_view_type=gallery

First, you move to Lewes...

Lioninthesun just a lovely vulva!

I have just sobbed at this thread thank you, thank you, thank you.
I salute the felted yonis and creative topiary and can only dream of becoming as attuned and enlightened.