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AIBU?

to not want to go to a BBQ at 40+8

60 replies

Splatt34 · 26/05/2013 08:41

just that really. Text from DH's friend just now re BBQ this afternoon. Am 40+8, rather fed up and just want baby out. Not dead keen to be making polite conversation about it with his mates, or worse my waters breaking there or some such. But DH has called me a grouch & says he'll go with DD anyway whether I go or not.

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alienbanana · 26/05/2013 08:43

Let him take DD and enjoy the peace :)

DontmindifIdo · 26/05/2013 08:43

how far away is it from your house? If it's less than an hours drive, send him with DD and put your feet up in peace, making it clear he has to stay sober because it's highly likely you'll call him to come take you to hospital.

Then sit in your own garden in the sunshine, eat a tub of icecream, read a book in peace.

BrokenBanana · 26/05/2013 08:43

Are you good friends them? I'd be tempted to go for a bit, you know you'll get treated like the queen that far along!

Basically at 40 +8 you can do whatever the hell you want, no one must argue with you :)

mirai · 26/05/2013 08:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Loulybelle · 26/05/2013 08:44

and what if you suddenly pop, and need him with you?

HollyBerryBush · 26/05/2013 08:44

Let him go with DD, you put your feet up and MN away to your hearts content!

In fact, that sounds like a plan!

fluckered · 26/05/2013 08:44

let him on and rest. enjoy the peace, nap, watch telly, pig out, whatever, and good luck!! he has plenty time to be a grouch when little one is born and he is as tired as you are now.

YouStayClassySanDiego · 26/05/2013 08:45

I'd stay at home and enjoy the peace and quiet. Dh can take dd to bbq and you can eat cake and watch dross on the telly.

HandMini · 26/05/2013 08:47

God, I'd welcome a bit of alone time if I were you net him to take DD, and go via the park on the way there and supermarket on the way back. Be gone no less than six hours. Result n

Ashoething · 26/05/2013 08:51

If dh gave me an ultimatum that he was going anyway and leaving me at such a vulnerable stage I would tell him to go and stay gone. Seriously he is putting a barbeque ahead of you?

CrazyOldCatLady · 26/05/2013 08:53

Definitely let them go and enjoy the peace and quiet. You don't have to do anything you don't want to at this stage (other than being pregnant!).

Gentleness · 26/05/2013 08:54

Let him go, with strict instructions not to drink. Unless it is further than 20mins away. No. Maybe 10!

pooka · 26/05/2013 08:54

he can go with dd.

Iheartcustardcreams · 26/05/2013 08:57

I went to one the other week when I was 40+3 wasn't going to go but glad I did in the end as I got to sit nod relax whilst my DCs were looked after! It was an hour away so took my notes and bag but didn't need it, baby born 2 days later!

BrokenBanana · 26/05/2013 08:59

Really Ashoething?

Splatt34 · 26/05/2013 09:00

Thank you!! Will see how we are doing later. It's a 35 min drive away & I guess I'm a bit worried should he go and then things start as was quite quick last time, plus I just don't want everyone knowing that I'm in labour IYSWIM. Not that baby seems in any rush. DD was 8 days late so I have been hoping it will be today at the latest.

OP posts:

FarBetterNow · 26/05/2013 09:01

Ash: Does her DH not leave to go to work on other days?

OP: send them off and just enjoy the peace and quiet.

Ashoething · 26/05/2013 09:01

Yes his attitude is appalling broken-but barbeques are a trigger for me as dh was a huge arse over one when I had just had a C-section.

HoobleDooble · 26/05/2013 09:02

Sounds like a win/win to me, either go to BBQ and be waited on hand and foot (and see how many times you can play the 'clutching your tummy and groaning' trick before it gets old), OR be free of DH and DD for a few hours of you time. Surely he won't drink if he has DD to look after would he?

Ashoething · 26/05/2013 09:03

Its not about the leaving her-its the fact that when op said she had doubts about going-her dh instead of trying to understand and be supportive-threw his toys out of the pram and said he was going anyway.

Fairylea · 26/05/2013 09:03

I'd let them go and if you need him back tell him to make an excuse that he isn't feeling well or whatever :)

Splatt34 · 26/05/2013 09:06

if I don't go he can't drink as will have to drive, but tbh he's dieting so not really drinking anyway.

He's not being horrible just trying to cheer me up & he knows I'll enjoy myself once I get there & I feel have missed out if don't go.

Hobble - like the idea of your game!

OP posts:

Gentleness · 26/05/2013 09:11

Actually, 35 mins drive would be too far for me at your stage. I'd go if my own friends would be there, because the drive might help start labour off. But I would be very, very wary of him being that far away. Second labours can be that fast and you're already feeling vulnerable today.

Fairylea · 26/05/2013 09:11

To be honest even if you were driving he shouldn't drink anyway as at this stage he might well be needed to drive at any moment!

elQuintoConyo · 26/05/2013 09:13

Tell him to go, take DD and explain to everyone that you're on the brink of popping and very tired.
Have a lovely few hours to yourself. Your DH sounds like only a 'momentary arse' not a full-time one

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