aibu to give into my 15 year old dd?

[inneedofsomehelpplz]

i used to make dd a sandwich of her choice & supply fresh fruit but when i checked her bag, it had green sandwiches & squashed off fruit so i now buy her a ginsters pasties, a bag of crisps & chocolate which she eats. dh says i should not bither giving her any lunch if she wont eat the healthy option but i disagree - getting any food in her during the day is my goal. at home she eats fresh fruit & veg & she is a slimjim.

so who is bu?

[DownstairsMixUp]

Baffled at some of these replies. Let the daughter buy crap = shit mother. Pack her a lunch at 15 = controlling. Deary me.

Just to clarify my Dad used to make my lunch at 15 for school and I was never "mollycoddled" or "controlled" thats just what happened, sometimes there really is no underlying meaning to what people do, they just do it, jesus.

Agree with your OH though to be honest, I would just pack the healthy lunch and thats the only option. She'll soon get hungry enough to eat it.

[TobyLerone]

Would she eat a homemade pasty? At least then you'd know what was in it.

[StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes]

oh blimey, MN must love me, I made Ds (17) his lunch today usually DH does it for him and on occaisions I have made sandwiches for them both and Ds 20 too! just part of doing nice things for each other in our household.

[Bluebell99]

Downstairs mixup This reminds me my dad always used to bring me a cup of tea in bed in the morning between 630 and 7 when he left for work, I forgot he did that :) I have absolutely no recollections of what I ate at lunchtime at high school! Do remember my dm always going to do a no 2 just when I wanted to do a wee before leaving, and the school toilets were rank!

[StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes]

but a pasty AND crisps AND chocolate is crap for every day lunch. Does DD understand a healthy diet? will she eat fruit? have you asked her why shes not eating the sandwiches? maybe she just gets fed up of them every day so alternate, sandwich one day, pasta pot another, tortilla wrap, stuffed pitta bread and a pasty the other day?

[WhereYouLeftIt]

Surely at 15, this is a good time for her to start taking responsibility for herself?

I'd sit down and talk to her about what her options are at lunchtime and why she makes the choices she does? What are the school lunches like? Does she avoid them because they are horrible, peer pressure or they're just not available? Why did she not eat the sandwiches and fruit - didn't like them, peer pressure, time pressure, what? (And why was she stupid enough to leave them festering in her bag rather than put them in the bin? Eew!) And why, if she knows an energy drink will give her a panic attack, she continues to drink them? Sorry, but that's just dim. Or bullied.

She's not a child, she's a trainee adult. Let her make a few bad choices, and learn from them.

[serin]

If she has been eating a sandwich and a piece of fruit everyday for years and years she is probably sick to death of them.

I make packed lunches for all 5 of us every day (I love doing this! am not browbeaten into it!) and I try to mix it up as much as I can.

Couscous/pasta salad, quiche or tortilla, kofta kebabs and hunks of decent bread, cheese and pickle go down well. I sometimes make my own veggie pasties or send in french bread pizzas made the night before. Smoothies are irresistable to most folk as well!

[WhiteBirdBlueSky]

Sounds fine to me. YANBU.

[Nanny0gg]

Couscous/pasta salad, quiche or tortilla, kofta kebabs and hunks of decent bread, cheese and pickle go down well. I sometimes make my own veggie pasties or send in french bread pizzas made the night before. Smoothies are irresistable to most folk as well!
As an adult with food 'issues' I wouldn't eat any of that except for the pizzas.
If your DD is eating a healthy meal at night, don't sweat the lunch. There's no point in making what she won't eat. And if you carry on, she'll bin it and you won't know anyway.
Discuss with her say, 5 options of her choice so that she can make meals she will eat.

It really won't kill her and there aren't many teenagers who don't eat crap at some point. Parents have no idea what they eat when not at home.