Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Feeling very left out…

53 replies

lizabeth0607 · 23/05/2013 19:04

I live alone in a flat with my 19 month old Daughter.
So I'm not normally a jealous person but this bank holiday weekend my mom has made plans to go to the zoo with my 2 brothers and my nephew on Saturday, me and my daughter have not been invited. That upset me enough but then, she tells me she's looking after my nephew all weekend and taking him to the seaside on Monday with my younger brother, again we were not invited! Am I just being jealous? She knows how lonely I find being a single mom

OP posts:

Nanny0gg · 24/05/2013 12:05

The no room in the car thing sounds like bollocks as well. I know your not supposed to do this anymore, but if there's only two of them in the back then there is no reason why you couldn't go with your daughter sat on your knee. It was what people used to do years ago. God, my mums family used to squash about six of them in the back of their car to go to the seaside and this was in the days before motorways when the journey took longer!
You're joking, right?

DiscoDonkey · 24/05/2013 12:07

Erm there's every reason not to go in the back of the car with her daughter on her knee,

pigletmania · 24/05/2013 12:08

That sounds awful, I would definitely ask. Some people just do not think

pigletmania · 24/05/2013 12:11

Just read te rest of your op, tey sound thoughtless and insensitive. Are they normally like this?

CelticPixie · 24/05/2013 12:14

No NannyOgg I'm not joking. People did it years ago with no problems. Don't hyjack the thread for your own agenda this is about the OP's problem.

Londonseye · 24/05/2013 12:18

Celtic my parents used to pile is sleeping into the boot of the car so we could driver overnight. Just because people used to do something, doesn't mean we do it now...knowing what we do about safety. Wow

toomuchtoask · 24/05/2013 12:20

Does your Mum perhaps find your daughter challenging (19 months with the constant 'what's that?' questions can be quite a trying age). Perhaps it's just too many children for her to have around her? Have a chat and say you are feeling a little left out. I'm sure she'd rather know. There could be very good reasons.

pigletmania · 24/05/2013 12:21

Celtic thats illegal. Times have changed, teir are more wankers on the road now, cars are faster. I remember back in the day, I was 8 and there was no seatbelts in the back of the car. My dad was driving on the motorway, somebody pulled out in front of him, he ad to slam on te breaks, I nearly went flying through his windscreen. I managed to hold onto the front car seats for dear life

toomuchtoask · 24/05/2013 12:21

Celtic - it is against the law which is reason enough, without even going into the safety issues.

DiscoDonkey · 24/05/2013 12:22

77% of child fatalities between 1996 and 2000 in road traffic collisions were due the the lack of or misuse of child seat restraints.

No problem my arse, what a stupid comment.

HandMini · 24/05/2013 12:23

Well done OP for telling your mum how you feel. It's not easy to say stuff like that. I think perhaps your mum just hasn't thought it all through very carefully or at all and it's important that you make her aware if she's being unfair in her bias towards one grandchild. Hope you have a good weekend anyway...in my experience, a 19 mo will be just as happy with the park and an ice cream as they would be at the zoo

Celtic - don't be an idiot, people aren't hijacking the thread for their own agenda, they're genuinely WTF that you could suggest such a thing!

CelticPixie · 24/05/2013 12:29

Disco you actually went off and found some road accident statistics. Wow, some people really do have too much time on their hands.....

Some people do need to get a grip.

Nanny0gg · 24/05/2013 12:29

No NannyOgg I'm not joking. People did it years ago with no problems. Don't hyjack the thread for your own agenda this is about the OP's problem.

It is indeed about the OP's problems. And your suggestion could make them a whole lot worse.

For a start, if I were her parent and she suggested your daft idea, she'd be told No in no uncertain terms (I'm quite fond of my driving licence, not to mention my DGC).
So it wouldn't help her relationship with her parents, would it?

DiscoDonkey · 24/05/2013 12:32

Oh ok I see you're actually just a total penis won't waste anymore time on you Celtic.

CelticPixie · 24/05/2013 12:33

I was trying to help the OP. Shes obviously upset at being left out, and really I do think they could try and make room for her and her DD if they wanted to. They could leave her brother at home and just take the grandchildren.

Original poster

lizabeth0607 · 24/05/2013 13:11

Tbh I think it's all a bit of an excuse, turns out that my brother got free tickets for them all to go to the zoo and my name wasn't mentioned to be put on the list, not sure if he was only allowed a certain amount of tickets.

Been arguing with my mom all day now, she said she knew I'd react like this lol, which to me proves she knew it was wrong.

My daughters good as gold for my Mom, I wouldn't have even minded if she had just offered to take my daughter to the seaside and I'd stay home due to the room in the car issue- I'd never not use her car seat.

OP posts:

Original poster

lizabeth0607 · 24/05/2013 13:14

She didn't then try to invite us either, I've made plans with a friend for Saturday now anyway. I think because I'm a good Mom I just get left to it.

OP posts:

pigletmania · 24/05/2013 13:18

My goodness op they sound awful, they just don't get it. At least if your brother had a limited amount of tickets she could have said to you. As you have already been to give your DN a chance to go. They all sound really mean. Have you got any friends you can go out with. Or just have a great day out with your dd

pigletmania · 24/05/2013 13:19

Liza that's great, stuff the lot of em. You don't need them, have a fantastic time yourself. At least you told your mum, so she will be more thoughtful and sensitive next time

Original poster

lizabeth0607 · 24/05/2013 13:35

I'll make sure me and my daughter have a great weekend, we don't have a lot of money anyway. My mom said she'd happily have my daughter on Saturday night if I needed a break :0 and I've been invited for lunch on Sunday now too, a guilty conscience I think!!

OP posts:

DryCounty79 · 24/05/2013 13:45

What StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes said.

I know exactly how you feel though, I sometimes feel left out as most of the people I know are married with kids, couples with no kids or single with no kids. As a single mum, I don't fit into any of those categories, so never don't often get invited along to outings etc. You are not alone

brass · 24/05/2013 13:47

make sure you take her up on offers!

the more she gets used to your dd the better.

Original poster

lizabeth0607 · 24/05/2013 14:04

Drycounty79- I'm exactly the same, it's even worse on bank holidays and in school holidays as everyone already has plans with their own families etc, can unfortunately be a lonely life huh :(

I intend to take her up on all of her offers, just wish she'd listen instead of getting defensive and arguing!

OP posts:

pigletmania · 24/05/2013 14:59

Good on you op, you take them up on their offers. You have to be forward sometimes

Corkyandviolet · 24/05/2013 15:31

Excluding you and the little one from a family outing because you can't pay your way seems even more unkind....

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread