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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To spend our money on a new bicycle

119 replies

BJunction · 16/05/2013 20:43

Hello all,

I wanted to get the "female" perspective on this...

My wife is due in a few months and we're putting all my recent bonus money and savings towards the required purchases. The issue is there is a lovely bike that I've been eyeing up to compliment my existing stable of bikes. The bike cost is about 40%-50% of the money we have but I'm sure we can get by on what's left. There's easily enough for a good cot and the rest of the stuff we'll need.

I've even made a spreadsheet covering the spend so it's clear we can do it but the wife is insistent that we spend all the money on the new born... who won't even remember this stage of his life.

am I being unreasonable for wanting this great bike whilst making sure there's enough left to cover the cost of the incoming baby?

OP posts:

theoriginalandbestrookie · 16/05/2013 22:43

Are you my DH in disguise who has recently bamboozled me into believing that actually buying a second hand sports car is in fact a great economy which is saving our household money rather than frittering it away.

Look in some respects YANBU. We spent loads on a special cot with a dropside (which we never used), a super duper pram that was replaced within 6 months by a second hand buggy as more light weight and there were various other bits and bobs that I thought were essential and turned out not to be.

But this is really not the time to be adding to your "stable" of bikes. You have more than one already, presumably unless you are superhuman you can only cycle one at a time.

Your wife's life has changed immeasurably already, she is carrying your child inside her. Taking money that you have both saved in good faith for your baby and spending it on your grown man toy is selfish. Plus you are kind of giving the message that 50% of the money is yours and 50% is for the baby. Where do luxuries for your wife come into it - what treat does she get other than necessities for the baby?

badguider · 16/05/2013 22:48

My DH and I are both cyclists and have more than one bike each. But this is not the time to buy a new one. Really.
If the money is still there on your LOs first birthday and you are still cycling enough to warrant it then maybe consider/discuss it then but for now you'd be FAR more sensible to spend half on the newborn and save half for unexpected expenses.

ChairmanWow · 16/05/2013 23:01

As a fellow cyclist I'm really tempted to say YANBU, we don't need to spend mega bucks on babies as long as they have somewhere to sleep, wear and a means of transport, but as a mum of a toddler and young baby I have to say it's unlikely you're going to get tonnes of use out of the new bike. Wait until the dust has settled with your family and you can commit some time to cycling again. There may have been a newer model of your desired bike by this point anyway. Why buy something that will gather dust for a while?

PatPig · 16/05/2013 23:51

It depends. If the bike is £1k and you have a household income of £2k/mth, Yabu. If your household income is £10k/mth, Yanbu.

If you are planning on spending thousands on expensive pushchairs and nursery furniture, then that's probably something for you both to reconsider, unless you can afford bikes and middle class nursery accessories, in which case you can both posses your collective incomes up the wall and sod the future.

NatashaBee · 17/05/2013 00:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsTerryPratchett · 17/05/2013 00:25

You don't need a female perspective. You have one of those, your wife's. You need a selfish twunt's perspective. Why do you get to spend half of the saving on you and half on the baby while your wife should... be grateful she is allowed to carry your baby?

PatPig · 17/05/2013 01:04

it depends what they are buying for the baby tbh. A lot of stuff 'for the baby' is for the benefit of the parents.

StuntGirl · 17/05/2013 01:07

Well obviously this is a vastly unreasonable attitude, but you knew that when you posted didn't you?

Original poster

BJunction · 17/05/2013 07:24

Get rid of a bicycle?! That would be like removing a teddy bear from a child's collection of teddy bears, one that they don't play with as much anymore and it's ear may have fallen off but they still love it.

I've just put a deposit down on a an awesome Specialized S-Works Venge online

I get I may get in trouble based on the comments made so far. My thinking is that we can easily make this work, my spreadsheet details all the stuff we should need so am pretty sure we'll be okay.

OP posts:

wonderingsoul · 17/05/2013 07:28

i think you are being increadably selfish indeed.

BikeRunSki · 17/05/2013 07:29

Thing is, if you were going to go and get the bike anyway, why did you even start this thread? The S Works is a nice bike though.

BikeRunSki · 17/05/2013 07:30

tumbletumble · 17/05/2013 07:33

This is either a joke or you are a truly selfish man

TeWiSavesTheDay · 17/05/2013 07:34

Wow, you are a complete twat and I hope your partner sees the light.

lljkk · 17/05/2013 07:37

That's an £8.5k bike at RRP. If your wife was planning to spend £17k on "new stuff for the baby" then I may be in the yanbu camp after all. Then again, if you need some of the original £17k total for things like your mortgage or a car bigger than your present Smart car then YABVU.

Please tell me you aren't buy the Venge on credit?!

We are a bikey family. DH just got a £4k bike as a leaving present from his company (Ridley Noah). It lives indoors because we don't trust security in the garage. That brings our stable population up to about 18. 5 of which are basically DH's bikes alone. (Please tell me you have an extra secure place to store that Venge). Are you paying the full £8.5k?

And even I am feeling rather at OP! Are you sure you didn't want to ask this on BikeRadar instead? Or is this all a windup?

SecondRow · 17/05/2013 07:42

Has your wife had input into your spreadsheet and how much discretionary spending for her hobbies/desires up until the end of maternity leave does it include?

lljkk · 17/05/2013 07:45

And what are you going to use the Venge for?
The Noah is for fun rides & long-distance TTing. No commuting at present, but maybe that in future, too.

enormouse · 17/05/2013 07:50

I think you might end up losing that deposit tbh when your wife realises you've done it. What was the point of canvassing opinion if you had already decided that you were going to buy a ridiculously expensive bit of kit?

Fwiw it's worth my DP wanted a new ps3 for when our DS came. He decided to wait till after he was born and realised he has no time. Not to mention, his bike is sitting forlornly is our dining room (has been for almost 2 years). I use it to dry clothes on when it's raining.

In terms of things that are actually useful and slightly awesome we bought a three wheeled rough terrain buggy 2nd hand as we live in the countryside and walk a lot. DP chose it (and was extremely excited about it) and gets way more use out of it than his bike or than he would out of a ps3.

Mondrian · 17/05/2013 07:51

I know you asked for a female opinion but how about a male, cyclist with a stable of bikes. As everyone has already said now is not the time even if you could easily afford it as you will be sending a the wrong signals to your DW which I am sure is unintentional .... It's her time and the new babies time, in other words she needs to know that you will also be able to make sacrifices (as she already is) and that you are not going to shoot off on a different selfish tangent.

To ease the pain of you apparent loss let me remind you how bicycle sales work. When you see 50% off it either means its coming from a mass marketed brand who have changed colour or something which is not a problem coz they do that 3/4 times a year or its from a faulty batch with high warranty replacements or its an old model from a reputable brand .... These things are always out there and can be had if you really want them in future.

enormouse · 17/05/2013 07:53

Oh and if you were my DP and had the audacity to present me with a spreadsheet, I would make you eat the sodding thing.

hormones

noblegiraffe · 17/05/2013 07:55

Bloody hell my car cost less than that, and that was a big purchase!

GoofyIsACow · 17/05/2013 08:01

BUT... HE HAS DONE A SPREADSHEET PEOPLE... SO IT MUST BE OK

edwardsmum11 · 17/05/2013 08:08

Yabu, just wondering if you have multible bums to go on your bikes...

noblegiraffe · 17/05/2013 08:18

I hope the spreadsheet doesn't have a 'finance on new bike' column then Lidl nappies, charity shop clothes, no formula (DW can breastfeed), DW going back to work early, DH doing hours of overtime etc.

BikeRunSki · 17/05/2013 08:22

let's hope you don't get made redundant when your baby is tiny, like what happened to DH. He had to sell his track bike, cyclocross bike and hardtail just to pay the mortgage.

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