To have laughed at my friend who said that I should be able to get all of my housework done on a Friday morning when I'm off?

[doublecakeplease]

I teach in FE, 4 days per week. 1 hour commute each way. DH works in a similar job, similar commute. We're out of the house from 7.15 am to 6pm every day and both of us often have prep to do once DS is in bed.

Ds is 16 months - he's at nursery / grandparents when i work so is out of the house for 4 long days.

I was jealously admiring my friends' beautifully tidy 1 bed flat and bemoaning my shit hole of a house. DH pulls his weight (if i remind him!) but home often looks very lived in. We're also doing up our manky old house so it is getting lots better as we build rooms around our needs!

Anyway - friend reckons i should be able to get everything done on a Friday morning whilst DS sits in his highchair and watches nicely. Apparently this would save DH from having to muck in, give me loads of time for our myself and my house would be immaculate!

Was i unreasonable o laugh?? ;-)

When / If she has children, you are going to remind her aren't you?

Of course i will blueberry! ;-) I'm not saying i do nothing on fridays (although DS is feeling very cooperative this morning so I've done more than usual. So far I've
Wiped the snot from the window from when he waved DH of
Stripped our bed
Tidied round the lounge quickly
Sat and watched DS sleep on my lap for 20 minutes

BUT mainly we've played, chased and hidden stuff!

DS is back to sleep in his buggy and I'm eating toast!

doublecake enjoy your son as he is little (or you might end up regretting spending so much time cleaning when he is a teenager and you hardly see him anymore).

And laugh at your friend!!

She has no idea....

Oh btw, I have always always considered that tidying up was our responsibility between me and DH.
When I was at home looking after the dcs, looking after them, playing with them going out etc... was my responsibility. NOT doing the HW. So I played, took them to the park and had a cup of tea (my break time that you normally have at work) when they were sleeping.
HW just fitted when I could/could be bothered.

I think if you're starting point is a well organised decluttered and generally clean house then with no-one in the house all day mon - thurs you really would be able to get it done on a friday morning. The funny bit is that she suggested the toddler would sit nicely and watch! No way!!

But cleaning it in a morning? Yes. I used to do it when i was on my own with ds1 and working full time. Dishes done and wash out in the morning. Wash brought in and tumbled when i came in at 6. Dinner and dishes in evening. I ironed while watching my soaps wash on before i went to bed to go out in morning. And i dusted and hoovered/ mopped on a saturday morning or friday evening if i was having people in. It really didnt take long at all. Maybe an hour? Bathrooms were done everyday as i was using them. Bleach down loo every night.

Boo - I'm NOT after tips - there are plenty of threads for that! Argh!

Lamazoo I actually think you're right - most families unless very very skint could find the money for a cleaner once a week/fortnight by giving something up. Certainly, we could all it would involve would be banning DP from doing the grocery shop he is terrible at doing an efficient shop and needs to buy something from every aisle

So why don't I have a cleaner? Guilt issues. I only have one DC too, and work from home a lot, so I feel like I should be able to get more done. I keep things ticking over, sort of, but a deep clean? No frickin way. I dunno. I think cleaners should be assigned antenatally to pregnant women, along with midwives...Now that'd be an interesting MN campaign

why would you want to spend your one morning off cleaning?shes mad.if i were you i would do the bare minimum and relax and enjoy being with your ds.

"Well at least I wont die with a hoover in my hand"

Right that is it. Yiu have inspired me. Despite the fact I spend ages stresing about housework the house is never clean. People say you wont look back on your deathbed and say you wish youd spent more time in the office. Not sure about that. Tbh as I love my job. However I will not look back on my deathbed and wish id spent more time hoobering cobwebs. So I am going to make an effort to do short bursts of actual cleanjng (instead of procrastinating on mn) im going to accept that even if dh doesnt do stuff to my standadds he does do stuff and then I am going to guilt free spend time on myself doing stuff I want to do. Playing with children. Park. Reading my book. Sitting and staring vacantly inti space. Im going to lamjnate fruolas phrase above and stick it on the fridge.

So? Im not givjng you tips. Im saying what i did. Chill.

Stealth

YABU OP - Have you not seen that nursery- tidying scene in Mary Poppins? I simply click my fingers and the washing machine and dishwasher load themselves, everything returns to its correct place and the mop and cloths zoom around (rather like in Fantasia) and the beds make themselves. I do this despite working fulltime hours down a mine and caring for the 7 little men that share my house

Can you not click your fingers OP?

Aha ha ha ha ha. Enjoy your day off with your lo.

DH sometimes has delusions of what housework can be done (and stay done) with a 2 and 3 year old in tow. One day when he isn't at work so blooming much he will learn.

I have a self cleaning family room. Dd4 spends all day messing it up but when i take her to bed it miraculously tidies itself, no way could it be the two teens lounging on the sofa .

I'm sorry but we're a household of 5 and laundry is at least 8 loads a week so no way could i get that done on a Friday morning. My house is half and half, most rooms are spotless all the mess is in the family room and guests never go in there so it gets a tidy up and hoover at night.

I couldn't keep a straight face if someone said that to me.

Op your friend is talking rubbish! Smile and ignore.

Wrt the rest of the thread - I'm on the fence. In definitely in the camp of enjoy your children, they're only young once, playing with them is more important than housework etc BUT .. From a personal point of view, if the house is a state, it really gets me down. So for me it's about finding a happy medium - not obsessing, prioritising the DCs, but taking a few mins here and there to get things organised and clean -ish. My standards aren't that high though and I very rarely - if ever - do this 'deep clean' people speak of! My standard weekly/fortnightly clean is more like fly lady's 'crisis clean'!

slattern alert here. I have 2 teenagers, 1 DH, 3 cats and a dog. A huuuuge house (not to brag, but to explain...). House is also in need of major renovation in most rooms. We have spiders you wouldnt believe, and we live by the sea so everytime a window or door is open sand blows in. I have a cleaner for 2 hours once a week. I work from home. I load and unload the dishwasher, washing machine and tumble dryer whenever required, and occasionally wipe down kitchen surfaces and chuck a bit of bleach down the loos. Otherwise that's pretty much it!! OK, I could do more, like hoover between my lovely cleaner's visits, but I really cant see the point in housework, no one ever notices do they?

So I'm on your side OP!

Please dont hit me but....

I have a large 4 bed house. We used to have a cleaner twice a week. They were so unreliable I decided to do myself and save the money in a 'holiday fund'. Its been like this for 8 years now!

I can do loads in 4 hours and am a real expert but I have a couple of rules:

1. If you arent a tidy person then 4 hours just wont make a dent.

1. Only do the cleaning when NO ONE is around.

1. Have two hoovers - a cheap one for upstairs and a more robust one for downstairs.

1. Have a set of cleaning stuff upstairs

1. Open the windows as much as you can to let everything dry.

1. Have at least 2 laundry baskets

1. When children are older show them how to change a duvet and pillow. My DS's are experts. They hate doing but its one less thing to do

1. Dont horde things. Once they are not needed - bin it!

1. Use wipes if you run out of time especailly in the bathroom. Look at Sainsburys and Asda Floor Wipes. They are really good and you can use them with spray if

Your friend is overlooking the fact that, once tidy, no-one else comes in and messes up her work - the tidiest flats have no-one in them! (especially no men and no children).
She sounds like a gem, ask her for some advice about parenting, go on.

I also get everyone to clean up the family room and living room before we go to bed. Involves plumping up cushions and removing any plates and other stuff lying around. Takes about 5 mins. I hate coming down to a trashed room.

A cleaner isn't possible at the moment.

Shame.

I went back to work 4 days a week when DD was 9 months old and I got a cleaner then specifically because I didn't want to spend my precious Friday off doing housework but spending time with DD instead.

And YANBU to laugh. Your friend knows nothing...

I don't know about 16mo sitting in high chair all morning, but I live in a one bed flat and if I tidy as I go during the week (which I endeavour to do and I'm mostly successful with) I could get all housework done in 4 hours (and I'm no expert at housework). But not deep cleaning - ie I would clean bath, basin, tiles, toilet and floor & polish mirrors, but not pull everything out of bathroom and do every surface.

I work 5 days though - so my whizz around doing housework will happen tonight when DD's are in bed, so everything is as sorted as possible for the weekend. Of course I need to change bedding the morning or before bedtime.

But that is a FLAT like your friend - a house would be bigger and different.

Well, we work, have two kids but don't live in a shithole. You tidy as you go along. Don't let things build up all week. Instead of sitting in front of the tv every night, I do stuff. When the kids are in bed, get cracking. Or stop moaning.

I must admit I do a bit every day and dont allow it to build up. I am not a hoarder either.

Ha ha ha ha ha! Well done for not accidentally on purpose knocking your tea over.

And that is when I got a cleaner (as we were lucky enough to be able to afford it). I found as DD got older she needed more input from me rather than less and wasn't happy to be sat in a corner whilst I tried to get on with housework - and I wasn't working part time because I wanted to spend my non-work time cleaning: I wanted to spend that time with DD. When DH was given the choice of cleaner or do more himself he chose cleaner (thankfully!).

Childless people really have no idea of the work involved with small children.

However, having a cleaner has kept me/us tidier so that the house is in a state to be cleaned.

But handcream you can't do anything with NOONE around if you have preschoolers which op does I have a 5, 3 & 1 year old and there is never a time when I don't have a kid to look after also it's VERY hard to engage an under 2 in cleaning as so many others have suggested whilst I am going something else 15 month old dd has put all the clean washing down the toilet or opened dd's drawers and pulled all the clothes out or emptied pasta all over the floor etc

Life with preschoolers is very different IMO and you can clean better when they're older