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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think children shouldn't have toy guns?

182 replies

trianglesaregood · 08/05/2013 13:55

At the park this morning and noticed some pre-school age boys playing, quite aggressively, with toy guns. One looked like some sort of machine gun complete with toy ammo! I was a bit shocked as I didn't think anyone gave their kids these kind of toys anymore; none of my friends do and I wouldn't think it appropriate for my children. Am I living in a bubble? Wondered what others thought?

OP posts:

VerySmallSqueak · 08/05/2013 21:02

Your house,your rules What

I imagine those who let theirs play with guns could cope with a temporary ceasefire at the childminders though

pigletmania · 08/05/2013 21:07

Yabvu children will use ther imagination. I had a plastic rifle as a kid which shot coloured plastic discs. I describe myself as a peaceful non violent person

MTSCostcoChickenFan · 08/05/2013 21:08

Our fathers and grandfathers probably spent a major part of their childhood playing cowboys and indians, cops and robbers and Allies v Germans. Look at what a bunch of anti social violent thugs they have become

SeamonkeyHasMyMoney · 08/05/2013 21:08

I guess it comes down to your personal feelings piffle. No other poster can really say yes you are, or no you are not too strict.

But just out of curiosity, why do you not allow weapon play? I know you've said you hate it, but I'd be interested to know your reasons.
And how have your mindees come to know it is not acceptable in your house?

Genuine questions, rather than picking at you personally - I promise! I just find it really interesting.

Any other posters with a zero tolerance attitude are also welcome to answer my musings!

deleted203 · 08/05/2013 21:11

YABU. Little boys love this kind of thing. And, as others have said, will make one out of lego, point their finger at each other, or use their imagination.

It's perfectly harmless to want to play cops and robbers, cowboys and Indians, or army men, IMO.

They won't necessarily grow up to rake down their classmates with an automatic weapon because you let them have a plastic gun aged 7, you do realise?

MrsMelons · 08/05/2013 21:18

Seamonkey that is exactly why I let my DCs play with guns etc - I think I just said it because it sounded like the right thing to say but I really couldn't find any proper reason to not allow it. They are really kind, lovely boys and not at all violent.

MrsMelons · 08/05/2013 21:19

although my youngest did 'shoot' me with an empty water pistol when I put him to bed (against his will) tonight!

edwardsmum11 · 08/05/2013 21:23

Never allowed toy guns when we grew up and son won't be allowed either.

Floggingmolly · 08/05/2013 21:26

Were they Nerf guns? They're just a bit of a laugh.

hiddenhome · 08/05/2013 21:39

Mine both play with guns of all kinds. Neither of them are violent, it's just play. I used to play with a gun when I was young and I'm not a serial killer.

Catmint · 08/05/2013 21:48

Dd has a nerf gun, but she does target practice with it, DP chalks hilarious bad guys on our back wall.

She has several swords, an axe and shield (plastic! ) and a bloody power rangers spin sword as well. Oh and a cutlass. They are all for killing Nylock.

NorksAreMessy · 08/05/2013 21:53

No toy guns here, but then I drive a car with a sticker saying 'peace' on the bonnet and the rest of it covered in flowers. I am an old hippy.

Didn't allow play fighting either. Play fighting is still fighting and it turns nasty in two blinks.

But my principals do not stretch to bows and arrows, as the broken lamp in the hall will attest . And Lego people were allowed to keep their weaponry.

NorksAreMessy · 08/05/2013 21:53

...for fighting off dragons

selsigfach · 08/05/2013 22:01

My hippie aunt banned toy guns when her boys were little. One has grown up and joined the army. She has since despaired why on earth she didn't just let him have a toy gun when he was little and get it out of his system.

NorksAreMessy · 08/05/2013 22:21

I am just waiting for DS and DD to both join the army for exactly this reason, selsigfach.
If you have hippie parents, the only rebellion is to conform :)

lifelorn · 08/05/2013 23:08

I stopped ds1 from any violent play or guns. At nursery he would make guns from any educational construction toy. On a visit to Disneyworld aged 10 he used all his own money to buy a toy gun, He is at this moment in camp Bastion - I hope others succeed where I failed.

thezebrawearspurple · 08/05/2013 23:33

yabu, it's harmless fun.

CoolStoryBro · 08/05/2013 23:33

I do love a good toy gun thread!

We live in the States, so have had to give our children some form of gun education. They know to always say no if theyre on a playdate and their friend asks them if they want to "see my Daddy's gun". They routinely have Code Red practices in school. They know, as they get older, if you see a fight break out, you get the hell out of there as you never know if one of the kids is packing. You don't stand around shouting, "Fight, fight, fight!!" There are 14 registered gun holders on my small street alone.

I honestly don't feel that allowing them to run around, shooting each other with Nerf guns, diminishes what we are teaching them. I credit my kids with enough sense to know the difference. And they do.

sashh · 09/05/2013 04:34

The first toy I bought myself was a gun. It was a luger cap gun.

My parents had a no gun rule.

Are toy guns still banned in NI?

Toy guns, nerf and water pistols fine, real guns made for children, no.

MrRected · 09/05/2013 04:55

Not read the whole thread, but PMSL.

My kids have made guns out of sticks, lego, wooden spoons. The world is going mad.

A nerf gun a murderer does not make.

Cookethenook · 09/05/2013 05:01

I'm not nuts about toy guns, but DS will use anything as a gun or a sword (seriously, give the boy a stick and it will be a staff, a sword, a gun or a wand), so we got him a nerf at Christmas.

He's not violent with it, just uses it for target practice. Tbh, I don't see it as being any different to a water pistol or having archery lessons.

But then, we were at my parents over the weekend and DS got to try out my dad's (very old) air rifle and, weirdly, a sword that he had 'lying around' in the shed! I hardly think its going to turn him into a phsycopathic killer.

MTSCostcoChickenFan · 09/05/2013 09:18

When my DS was a toddler I invited a nursery mate and his mum over. The mum saw DS's toy gun collection and made some comment about not liking her DS to be around toy guns. I never invited them around to my house thereafter.

The USA has a serious gun problem. It doesn't help that Hollywood glorifies the whole thing. I read that in some schools having the latest Glock (make of gun) has taken over from having the latest Nike trainers.

So if you was an American parent then I can understand your attitude but come on, most of us live in areas where arguing over a parking space is as violent as it gets. Playing with toy guns hasnt exactly turned out fathers or grandfathers into men insensitive to violence.

at the mom who thinks that her DS joined the army because she didn't let him play with toy guns as a kid.

FryOneFatManic · 09/05/2013 09:31

I've never bought toy guns, but the DCs will make guns out of anything to hand. I have, however, bought DS a sword as part of a pirate costume.

I think you can teach children the difference between a toy and a real gun and that playing with toys is fine but that real guns are not toys.

shebangsthedrum · 09/05/2013 09:54

I think our children our probably the first generation that it has not come natural for children to play with toy weaponary. Up until the invention of the silver screen children's play was based on what they saw adults doing and for hundreds of years that involved carrying weapons. Come the turn of the last century and the invention of visual and auditory media, childrens play copied the pirates and cowboys and futuristic style robot baddies all with their own weapons. It is only now some parents are questioning the safety of this, I really don't think that we will have less violent crime in the future thanks to 6 yr old playful pascifists today. Let their play be imaginatively unhindered, fair enough, don't buy your kid guns, but don't stop them pointing other things and pretending and don't worry about those who by 7 own a plastic arsenal, they will be ok!

Growlithe · 09/05/2013 10:08

I just don't know about all this role play toys stuff.

I have 2 DDs. They went to nursery (there were no toy guns there of course) and made guns out of their fingers like the other children and said 'bcr bcr'. They grew out of it quickly because they started gravitating towards other girls as they hit school age and played those kinds of games less often.

I wouldn't have been keen to have toy guns at home, but we do allow princess dressing up, and play make up, however. Now some would say that would be equally damaging in terms of reinforcing societies view on body image etc on girls. So really I'm a bit of a hypocrite I think. We may have ended up allowing guns if we'd had boys who pushed for them.

What I would say is, I have two brothers and a sister - all over 40. The lads always got toy guns for presents, and we all played with them. My sister and I used to dress up as princesses all the time too (we didn't have the stuff you can get now of course, we 'designed' our own from old clothes).

The last thing either of my brothers would want to do now is pick up a real gun. If you saw me you would know that I'm not bothered about clothes and makeup.

I think however you play, and whatever toys you are allowed, you take your cues and values from how your parents and how they behave in real life.

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