To lie to the church about our godparents?

[bumblebeesue]

We're having our child christened, mostly at the insistence of our parents, but also because it's a nice day and (I suspect) it means more to DH than he is letting on.

I got the paperwork to fill in today and 'godparents' have to be christened with at least one being confirmed.

Even though I'm not sure what I believe, choosing godparents is still important to me as people who will be there for our children should anything happen to us... But out of our two best couple friends (one being my sibling and his wife, and the other being best friends of ours for 20 years) only one is christened. (and confirmed)

I don't want to have to choose other people just because they are christened. I want to choose the very best people for my child in the future. (plus I know that they all really want to do it and would be amazing.)

So AIBU to just tick 'christened' even though they aren't? And what are the chances of being caught out?

[HullMum]

why even take part?

[NotTreadingGrapes]

Our godparents for dd were asked to provide their baptism and confirmation certificates.

HTH.

[nancerama]

DS has 3 godparents. Two are Roman Catholics and one was never baptised. I felt uncomfortable lying to the vicar so I told him the truth. He was fine about it. He understood that the people we had picked were important people to me, DH and DS and felt we had picked the best people for the job.

[hiddenhome]

And you can stick your 'duh' up your arse you hypocrite. You tell your pathetic lie and I hope you get found out.

[CSIJanner]

My priest went around and asked all the Godparents - will your mates be willing to lie?

I'm with ChocsAway - it's not about honorary aunts or uncles. It's about faith. If the people you choose are as you say, going to be in your child's life and active, then it doesn't matter if you choose them or not as they will always be there.

[JugglingFromHereToThere]

Well hh, if the church really wanted to promote honesty and integrity then they'd suggest thanksgiving services much more widely I think.
I think the church have just as much to answer for as the families in these issues.

[Sirzy]

It's actually not a question of the christening at all by the way, just of the godparents being able to be who I choose rather than who I'm forced to have.
Shocking isn't it. Imagine a church wanting GODparents to actually be part of that faith. How dare they want people to take things seriously

[ConferencePear]

How can you have a child baptised into a faith that you don't believe in ? Christians believe in the ten commandments one which is "Do not lie".
For goodness sake have a naming ceremony and don't be a hypocrite.

[thepig]

You are making a complete mockery of my (and others) faith.

Maybe be a little less over-sensitive and a bit more content in your own beliefs? You seem to have a very big chip on your shoulder about how other faiths wouldn't be "disrespected" like this...even though other posters have pointed out that they are. You're also very judgemental, have you thought about why that is?

I'm sure lots of other Christians would think you're making a mockery of the faith too by the way you practice it. The fragmentation of Christianity means that's unavoidable, whatever your exact beliefs.

Anyway out of interest...what does the bible say about the issue?

[Helspopje]

Our will has provision for who will look after our daugher in the event of.... They are non churchgoers (although I know that my sister if not also her husband is Christened) and would, if asked, I am sure say that they would find it a bit to make some of the responses in good conscience.

Two other very good friends who do have strong Christian faith (although one is of another denomination to us) are our DDs godparents. They do a marvellous job and I am delighted that they have special status as godparents amongst our friendship group.

I've always been of the mind that godparents should be people of faith rather than the parents' best mates/sibs but I am progressively boxing myself into a corner as the majority of our friendship group are not churchgoers/professors of their faith so a v small number of people to consider asking for the new baby(ies).

On a whole other topic, I do find it a bit flumoxing why people not of faith would choose Christen their child. The cynic in me wonders whether access to faith schools may have something to do with it.

[OutragedFromLeeds]

Conference Is the grandparents believing not enough? It takes a village and all that...

[JugglingFromHereToThere]

Of course, definitely does sometimes Hels, where it's one of the criteria.

[ChocsAwayInMyGob]

thepig- I think that's a very unfair attack on hidden home. She was not being judgmental.

The OP wants her day in Church with none of the annoying religious stuff. This feels very disrespectful to me!

In fact it's the modern liturgy that dictates current baptism form, not the Old or New Testament.

[Maxium12]

You imagine you'll wear some sort of hat, maybe you'll need two, one for each face.

[Wishiwasanheiress]

Seriously, repost this in spiritual. See what they think? You (op) appear to think those of us with expressing surprise at this choice or any view other than 'hell yeah go for it," are wrong. Another op is always right thread....

[OutragedFromLeeds]

That's the fault of state-funded faith schools though, not the parents. If we didn't have state-funded faith schools people wouldn't need to lie about their religion.

[Wishiwasanheiress]

I think hiddenhomes views have been well expressed also.

[SantanaLopez]

I don't think Hiddenhome is being U, the OP clearly is.

Outraged it's more the fault of England's bizarre school placing systems. No one christens their child in Scotland just to get into a faith school.

[givemeaclue]

Yabu, have a naming instead.

Godparents have no role should something happen to you, its a religious commitment only. You can choose whoever you want as per your will to be responsible he something happens to you. Godparents there is a different requirement.

[OutragedFromLeeds]

How do they place children in Scotland Santana?

[JugglingFromHereToThere]

I'm kinda with Outraged on the schools thing.
IMHO You can't just blame the parents, it's the whole system.

[bumblebeesue]

Just to clarify... It's got nothing to do with school. We live ten houses down from a non faith school that is amazing and I hope for my children to go there, or to the other non faith school a street away.

[OutragedFromLeeds]

bumble someone else brought up the school thing.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

Outraged, in Scotland, children just go to their local non-denominational school. Parents can request a different school but mostly don't. Parents can also choose a Catholic school if they want.

[thepig]

thepig- I think that's a very unfair attack on hidden home. She was not being judgmental.

You don't think this is judgemental?

Disgusting attitudes some of you have

I bet you're the sort of people who pour scorn on people who do take their faith seriously.