to cancel going to a hen party to attend another event?

[poglol]

Have been invited to a hen party of someone i know, not a close friend but someone i am becoming friends with. I can't attend the wedding even though I've been invited, as I'm on holiday.

Now my boss is retiring. She has been my boss for 11 years and i really admire her. She has taught me a lot and she's a good boss. Her retirement party is the same night.

I really don't want to miss the chance to wish my boss farewell, but i hate it when people pull out of events for a 'better offer' . Actually the hen party will probably be the more fun event, as the retirement party will be work collages, who are a rather mixed bunch to socialise with, but i don't want to miss my boss's send off.

Any suggestions?

I think honesty may be the best policy (especially once you've decided).

It would be reasonable to explain the situation to your upcoming friend, and if she's a nice sort, she'll understand. On the other hand, when you and your new friend are solid friends years down the line, you'll both be a bit that you weren't at her wedding, because its something that DOES get talked about for years!

It would also be reasonable to make a fuss of your boss, take them for lunch, buy them a personal momento, explain that you've already committed to that evening to someone else, for very good reason (you can't attend their wedding etc.,)

Either decision would be reasonable, and though you don't need any reason or excuse at all, if you play it right, both will still think very highly of you (unless they're actual bastards in which case it's still a win!).

I don't deal on first come first served basis, BUT I don't cancel 'just' for a better offer... there's an element of judgement, loyalty and priority involved.

You should go to the hen.

Take boss out for dinner or lunch, that will mean a lot.

Thanks aldi there's some good points there, perhaps I should think a little bit more about it. I will defiantly be honest with them both tho.