to not let dd go to MacDonald's til she eats better at home?

[Amykins35]

DD goes dancing tonight which finishes at 6.30. We usually go to MacDonald's afterwards as it's late to cook tea. Usually she eats really well at home/in her packed lunch but in the past few weeks she's barely eating and definitely not healthily. For example, she used to eat porridge and fruit for breakfast, fruit for snack,Ham sandwich/wrap and snack a jacks, pepper, cucumber, yoghurt, 2 portions fruit and cake, after school she'd have a portion of fruit and cheese and crackers then something like spaghetti, meatballs and garlic bread for tea followed by fruit and chocolate mousse for pudding.

Now a typical day is nothing for breakfast, nothing for snack, she eats the snack a jacks and cake out of lunch box then leaves the rest, after school she doesn't want any healthy snacks so doesn't get anything yet still doesn't eat tea. Tonight when we go to the park she'd like an icecream but I'm not happy to buy that or MacDonald's while she's not eating well the rest of the time. I appreciate she won't starve but lack of food/only unhealthy food makes her Moody and also it's annoying to waste so much food when I ask what she'd like in her lunch box and she tells me but then doesn't eat it.

AIBU to say she can't have icecream/MacDonald's until she starts eating better at home/stops wasting food? I've tried reducing portions by the way but she still doesn't eat it.

Nice weather, they want to race off and play with their friends. It's hopeless putting fruit in lunch boxes in summer.

Apple takes time to eat, sandwiches take time to eat. DD2 would take three bites out of her apple and Two bites out her sandwich and declare the rest crust. It's utterly maddening.

Breakfast, I wonder if she's tired. Longer light evenings and more running about or the sun waking her early and making her restless.

Hay fever making her snuffly, tree pollen is making wake up feeling yuck.

Agree with a lot of other posters, your original menu was rather large! When dtds were that size a typical school day menu was

Breakfast, one weetabix, small glass of fruit juice.

Elevenses Small milk, a box of raisins.

Lunch one sandwich (ie two slices of bread), one piece fruit, one little yoghurt, water.

Hometime a cake or a couple of biscuits or a pack of crisps.

High tea, a proper meal, half adult size, and a proper pudding, also half size, if all gone the right to forage at will in the fruit bowl and maybe another small cake/biscuit/crisps.

Just before bed, milky drink and biscuit if wanted.

Don't start creating issues around food for her.

this

little kids can be slow eating lunch at school or want out to play and are too impatient to sit and eat the snack a jacks are portable so she can take them out with her, but do make sure nobody at school or dancing is mentioning 'fat' or junkfood or unhealthy as a little 5 yr old brain can't process that and will think if I eat X then i wont be fat or I will be healthy etc etc, also is there a healthy eating topic at school atm ?

Yes I agree about breakfast. At this young age, I would never allow my children to go to school without breakfast.

xposted LOADS!!

es I agree about breakfast. At this young age, I would never allow my children to go to school without breakfast.

NO i wouldnt but I do think if she is beingpicky and not eating at all the a change of breakfast would be better than nothing,

My dd is almost 10 and tbh I'd be proud of you for packing away in a day what she would. She loved a healthy balanced diet and was a real foody. Probably around 5 she did become a bit fussy about food I think it was the influence of children at school and hearing them say they didn't like things..
I just continued giving her what I always did including the odd McDonald's. I never made a fuss and she eventually missed a lot of her favourite foods and started eating it all again.

She also started going for school dinners, she got a bit fed up of packed lunches and so we agreed on days for each so she got a bit more variety in her lunches as well..

specialsubject Our just 6 yr old GD is already talking about her belly being too big so it seems to start early nowadays.

I agree the OP's DD WAS eating more than I eat! So maybe one of her little dancing friends has said something to her or she's overheard other Dcs talking and it makes them get body conscious. Maybe chat to her about it,without making a big deal of it.

I would take her shopping, get her to choose some nice fruit and veg. and cook it with her (she can chop up the fruit to make pictures etc.). You're right not to make a fuss whether she eats or not. Just give her less in her lunch box.

They have half hour to eat lunch before they're allowed outside so she has plenty of time. She says she wasn't hungry when asked about not eating sandwiches but then would ask for a grown up meal at MacDonald's so obviously is hungry. If I still let her have MacDonald's/ice cream she'll be awkward and hold out for them, continuing not to eat. Well the rest of the time. Unfortunately I can't 'not let her go to school unless she's eaten breakfast'. I offer it, provide I but can't/won't force her to eat it

Thing I'd even if she was weight conscious, she knows fruit is healthy and MacDonald's isn't so it wouldn't make sense to stop eating fruit but want to eat more MacDonald's

Oh and she enjoys helping to shop and cook but still won't eat it!

no don't force her see if she was under5 amy you would be able to phone a health visitor for advice but as soon as they hit 5 we are on our own sigh is she stubborn in other ways dd1 is very stubborn and her not eating was about control imo she liked to say what she would and would not do, could you give her a cereal bar on the way out the door, or something or a bit of fruit to eat on the way to school,

Without trying to make a big deal out of it, try to get the breakfast back on track at least. None of my DCs eat breakfast - getting up earlier etc has never helped - it just makes them feel sick.

But if your DD did used to eat breakfast, try to get it back into their routine while you can. You'll be doing yourself a favour for years to come.

And I disagree about it being too much food - everyone is different. Unless your DD is overweight, she's probably been eating the right amount for her.

Yes she's extremely independent. I've tried food to eat on way to school but still doesn't eat it. If I have biscuits/crisps etc she practically salivates over them and is obviously hungry. I've tried a chart where she gets a tick for each portion of fruit/veg and then a treat (like baking and a film) if she got at least 5 per day for a week which worked really well previously (her record was 55!) But she doesn't care about that anymore. I think she feels it's unfair that her friends mums collect them and give them a bag of sweets whether they've eaten lunch or not - despite DD not even liking sweets - plus no doubt they pass on their fussiness at lunch time

If my children refuse to eat breakfast at home (which has happened a few times) then I grab a banana or sandwich and I insist that they eat it on the way to school. Usually walking to school makes them feel hungry anyway.

She isn't overweight but isn't skinny either. She looks slim but with a stuck on belly!

Kelda - walking used to encourage her to eat too but not anymore

Do they have any parent & child cookery courses/days in your area?

Maybe getting involved in preparing the food outside of the home environment might help get her back on track. The ones in our area concentrate on healthy recipes and some even set aside time at the end for the families to eat the food on the premises.

you must feel like you are banging your head against a wall with her I think dd just started eating again when I stopped fretting about it, I did pare back on treats though but I would have taken her to Mcds for her tea act normal but ignore the fussiness,

what about those pre made fruit pots or packet apple I know it is a PITA but sometimes needs must

It does sound like she is rebelling to health eating. And she is expressing her free will, wanting to eat what she wants, rather then being told by you.

My dd2 and ds were always dreadful with eating (ds has recently been diagnosed with a type of oral dyspraxia which makes eating a bit more difficult and I suspect that dd2 has something similar) and I have always been very careful NOT to put any emphasis on healthy eating. I have never once made them finish their plate or given them rewards for healthy eating.

If I pressure them at all into eating something, they just won't eat it.

But gradually they are eating more and more healthily without seeming to realise it. The relax approach in my family has paid off in the long term.

If you don't want her eating junk, just don't make it available - no junk food in the house and no visits to fast food places. Offer the meals and she either eats or she doesn't, basic bread and butter before bed if she's hungry.

I would be asking her a few questions. You might not think she is body conscious but they start young.

It could be that a child at school is really skinny and only seems to eat junk.

It could also be just a bit of fussiness, friends at school having something different.

But what Andro said.

My DS Is 5 and in reception.
He used to have a sandwich, cheese, yoghurt, 2 pieces of fruit and raisens at the start of term.(September)

Now he has ... A sandwich, grapes, raisens and a cereal bar and without a doubt he will bring two items back.

He started to get fussy saying he doesn't like chicken, fish, lamb or salad which he would previously eat at dinner times. I kept giving it to him because I knew he liked those things it's just a phase he went through to see if I'd give in and he would have chips everyday. He doesn't bother to make a fuss now he knows it won't make
A difference.

Amykins She's not being logical so whether she 'knows ' fruit is healthier or not is'nt the issue IMO . She's wanting to take control of something. Do you generally give her choices in her life? like choosing what she wants to wear etc.

It's a normal part of growing up and exerting her personality.