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AIBU?

To be totally fed up ... No wedding dress 4 weeks before big day.

92 replies

DangerousBeanz · 28/04/2013 17:04

My wedding dress was being made by a friend who is a professional dressmaker, She offered to make it as a wedding present, I didn't ask her as I know she can be a bit flaky but was grateful as she is fab and said I would pay her as it was too much for a gift. Anyway we had a bit of a fall out over another issue and now shes not returning calls, even to let me know if shes still making it or not. I've had several fittings.
WWYD should I take it that I now have no frock, 4 weeks before the wedding and get my ass to BHS to buy a last minute number or wait a bit longer hoping she'll start being more communicative and risk schlepping down the aisle in my onesie with posh hair, make up, shoes, flowers and Jewellery.
I have already apologised even though it was definitely a six of one half a dozen of the other thing- and the row was about politics ffs so not a personal thing.
Right now I am feeling totally stressed with the whole situation, I suffer from depression and anxiety to start off with and am on medication for that. I'm not sleeping. I want to get the situation back under my control but feel like I'm slowly slipping again. WWYD?

OP posts:
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Ruprekt · 28/04/2013 22:30

Dan Kerr bridal shop in Preston has a massive sale on atm.

Am sure you will find something.

I would not have her there though! Cow!AngryAngry

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PrincessTeacake · 28/04/2013 22:37

Db, as a seamstress I am pissed off on your behalf. (I was already pissed off before this, but never mind). Give me an idea of what you want and I'll make it for you.

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Fleecyslippers · 28/04/2013 22:41

That's really horrible of her. I'd also be tempted to ask DP to relay the message that you realise she is no longer making your wedding dress.

I 'LOVE' wedding dress shopping - when shall we meet ? Grin

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CSIJanner · 28/04/2013 22:47

Debenhams have a 20% off sale at the mo, with another 10% with code JR32 plus free delivery. Hope you find something soon! If preloved, it could be your something old or even borrowed Grin

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IwishIwasmoreorganised · 28/04/2013 22:48

There's a charity wedding dress shop in Cheadle - is that far from you? I think it's St Anne's hospice. my cousin got her bridesmaids dresses from there.

YANBU to be fed up. Ditch your 'friend'.

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TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 28/04/2013 23:02

I got my size 14 dress from Berketex (in Chester), I bought it and took it away on the day, it fitted just fine. Years ago so you should check their current locations and if they all do that.

Or stick a thread up with your size, location and general preferences on S&B and I bet you get more lovely offers like the ones here.

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PrivateBenjamin · 29/04/2013 10:34

Everybody is so lovely on threads like these. Nest of vipers indeed!

OP i wouldn't rely on this woman even if she does agree to make your dress, she'd probably just pull the same trick with a few days to go, just like a previous poster said, and then you'd really be up poo creek without a paddle.

Good luck!

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cfc · 29/04/2013 10:40

OP i also have an alfred sung dress that you can use if you like, it's totes nice. It needs a dry clean though so let me know and i'llget that done - i've been looking for a reason to get it out! I'm in the SW and it would fit a nsize 14 i reckon.

What a shame to fall out like this xx

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cfc · 29/04/2013 10:43

oh, i see you're in manc, i could give it to my mum to bring home with her after our hols next weekend - she lives in liverpool you could try it there x

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LippiPongstocking · 29/04/2013 10:46

I bought my wedding dress from eBay (£50!), and got it adjusted locally for £50, a week or so before my wedding. It can be done! Don't let this woman ruin your day.

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iseenodust · 29/04/2013 10:54

Another one who bought from Monsoon with only 3 weeks to go. I saw what I liked, they ordered my size in so could see if liked it when zip fastened !!!

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sashh · 29/04/2013 11:50

Get another dress.

Even if she finishes this one you will be thinking about her and the argument walking down the aisle.

If you can get to Liverpool there's a big discount warehouse of sample wedding dresses in the centre.

Also somewhere you could get a pineapple and a palm tree.

I know I always go on about Indian material shops (love my local one), but one advantage with a sari is that they are all 5 metres and fit everyone - you just need to get a blouse made.

www.cbazaarsarees.co.uk/saree/white-color/c-sb.html

This could be an unconventional wedding dress, and made to your size for less than £100

www.cbazaarsarees.co.uk/salwar-kameez/party-wear-salwars/exquisite-off-white-churidhar-suit-p-slsfcj7248a.html

And I love this one

www.cbazaarsarees.co.uk/readymade-salwars/wedding-salwars/pleasing-white-anarkali-suit-p-sl20g184469.html

Damn I've got to find someone to marry

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Wickedgirl · 29/04/2013 12:07

eBay have some stunning dresses

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LemonsLimes · 29/04/2013 12:13

I was going to ask if your wrote "Ding Dong the Witch is dead" on FB and then saw that the argument was indeed about Mrs T! Grin Is that what happened?

I don't think you can rely on this woman any more as what if she said she would do it and then still let you down. Has she already bought the material?

Good luck finding a new dress. I get it from somewhere you can try it on if i were you, rather than ordering online

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AutumnMadness · 29/04/2013 12:17

Sounds like you need a new dress. Try this Guardian article: www.guardian.co.uk/fashion/2013/apr/21/lauren-laverne-fashion-wedding-dresses?INTCMP=SRCH

It's all about affordable and quirky wedding dresses. I'd love one of them if I was getting married again.

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newgirl · 29/04/2013 12:18

My friend had the most beautiful vintage dress from a pop up sale she saw online £125 it was so fab - she had bit taken in at local dry cleaner

She's wealthy - it was simply a fab find

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TheTiger · 29/04/2013 12:29

If you can get to Bury, Esme's sell wedding dresses that they have in stock straight to you, and do your alterations. Good luck!

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angelos02 · 29/04/2013 12:33

She's not seriously going to turn up at your wedding having done this to you? Shock

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SavoyCabbage · 29/04/2013 12:33

I bet you end up with a fabulous dress. I got my dress just a couple of weeks before my wedding and I loved it. You'll find one you love too.

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Scheherezade · 29/04/2013 12:44
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MrsLettuce · 29/04/2013 12:44

did you see this one?

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SarahAndFuck · 29/04/2013 12:45

You definitely need to get another dress.

It doesn't sound like she's finishing yours.

The worst that can happen if you buy another dress now is that she does finish the first one and you will have the choice of two on your wedding day.

That's got to be better than not buying another one and going to your wedding in your pyjama's like the Vicar of Dibley.

And Manchester is probably one of the better places to be if you need to find something non-traditional but still lovely for a wedding in a hurry.

How on earth are your (ex) friend and her partner going to be at the wedding though? Surely they will be embarrassed, especially as she has made it pretty clear she's finished with you as a friend? She's behaving like a child, she's let your down over your wedding dress, she's not actually speaking to the bride, yet she still my come to the wedding itself as a guest? I'd be too embarrassed to show my face it that was me.

And I hope it won't affect your DH's friendship, but petty things have a way of blowing up and dragging everyone in.

Has he spoken to his friend about the dress yet?

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Shylepite · 29/04/2013 12:49

What a cow! I think she will try to keep you hanging on for as long as possible so that she can enjoy the power and cause you lots of stress. I would just assume she's not doing it and make other arrangements, take back control and really piss her off! What size are you? I have a beautiful size 8 dress in storage which you are very welcome to Smile

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slug · 29/04/2013 14:36
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MrsTerryPratchett · 29/04/2013 14:44

I second and third telling her in writing that she has broken your contract by not being in contact. Then, the awesome, cheap, unique dress you find will be a 'funny' story for the wedding.

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