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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to be mildly annoyed by school and new library book policy

23 replies

havingamadmoment · 26/04/2013 12:33

DD is in nursery the nursery is attached to the same school my older children go to. When they were at the nursery they used to bring a library book home each week with them but for some reason they have changed this so that the parents have to go in once a week to change the book with child. I work 2 days a week and dd goes to nursery 2 full days and doesnt go the other three. I rush the children in and rush back to the bus stop if I am a even 5/10 minutes getting the book I will miss the bus and although ok once in a while I cant do it every week.

So instead of that now I have to take her in on one of the days she isnt normally there. DH normally takes the older two in on this day on his way to work then goes straight to work on the bus, he wouldnt have time to bring her home again so I have to take the three younger children (4,2 and 1) out just to go and get this sodding book - its a 2 mile walk so its not just nipping around the corner. When I get there I have to leave the pram outside (no prams in the school building) carry the youngest and drag the 2 year old (who wants to play with all the nursery toys!) while picking a book for the 4 year old.

I know its not world shattering but it IS a stupid policy isnt it? surely its difficult for lots of people?

AIBU?

OP posts:

MidniteScribbler · 26/04/2013 12:36

Why can't your husband do it?

Sirzy · 26/04/2013 12:38

Can you not do if when you pick her up from nursery? Surely it only takes a minute or two?

I think the idea of picking with a parent is nice but if its really inconvenient then speak to them about just sending one home

Trill · 26/04/2013 12:38

I can understand why they would not want to lend a book to a 4 year old without an adult being present to take responsibility for the book.

Original poster

havingamadmoment · 26/04/2013 12:39

Midnite he cant do it as he wouldnt have time to walk her back to the house before going to work.

It has to be the morning because they dont have it set up in the afternoon.

OP posts:

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 26/04/2013 12:39

I assume DH hasn't time?

LadyintheRadiator · 26/04/2013 12:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HazeltheMcWitch · 26/04/2013 12:42

Have you told them it's an issue? If not, do - there may be an easy workaround.
If not - yes, they are being unreasonable! And if so - could you just NOT get a book, and say that you'll do other reading activities (books you own, local library etc), at a time/place that works better for you?

JeanPaget · 26/04/2013 12:43

No of course you're not bring unreasonable. What about parents who work full time or single parents?

Possibly working-mother's guilt, but I really hate policies like this that make me feel like a bad mother because I can't pop into the school at a moment's notice in the middle of the day

redskyatnight · 26/04/2013 12:43

DD's old nursery had this policy too. It's to encourage you to spend time choosing a book with your child that they will enjoy (and avoid no doubt the perpetual complaints that child came home with dull/uninteresting book).

I'd suggest

explaining situation to member of staff and asking if they can change book with your child
(depending on age of older children) can DD change book with one of her older siblings
Can't you change the book when you pick her up?
Explain to staff that it's impractical for you to come in and go to public library instead.

fubbsy · 26/04/2013 12:43

If I were you, I wouldn't bother going to the school library and just take the little one to the public library each week at a more convenient time.

redskyatnight · 26/04/2013 12:45

... I see it's not set up in the afternoon, but you could still ask to change it then - just makes it a bit harder in terms of rooting about.

MidniteScribbler · 26/04/2013 12:45

Just let him pick one without her there. Then he can bring the book home with him after work.

BackforGood · 26/04/2013 12:46

Do you not have a public library near by ?

Pozzled · 26/04/2013 12:46

Why don't you just not bother using the school library? Surely you can just use the public library at the weekend?

Justforlaughs · 26/04/2013 12:46

Just explain to the school that it isn't convenient for you. They probably haven't thought it through properly. I'm sure they will be more than happy to accomodate you and if they don't then just use the local library instead. They can hardly force you to stay late to change her book.

Original poster

havingamadmoment · 26/04/2013 12:47

I did tell them it was awkward for the above reasons but tbh I feel a bit shit about saying I wont do it - I dont want to look as though I just dont care and when I said about the issues with doing it she made me feel like I was being unreasonable to not want to go on the friday. Which is why I asked here I cant decide if I am making a fuss about nothing!

OP posts:

Grammaticus · 26/04/2013 12:55

I'd just use the public library. The school have tried, they can't suit all of the people all of the time.

CloudsAndTrees · 26/04/2013 12:56

If you really want your child to have a library book, then I think you have to go by the policy. I don't suppose it's compulsory that she has a library book though, so just say you don't want one if you don't want to do it on one of your days off.

Would you be able to get there any earlier on the day you work so that you have time?

Or would your dd be able to have a look at what book she might want on the day before you go in so that changing the book over is a quick process?

DumSpiroSpero · 26/04/2013 12:57

Our primary school is very heavily into getting parents involved and engaged with their children's learning - I think it's to 'gee up' the parents who cba to some extent (we have to sign in when attending school events and if you miss 2 in a row you get a phonecall from the head!).

If you've explained the situation, then they should be understanding given your circumstances. Could you say you'll have a chat with your DD each week and put a note in with some some books she'd like to try so they can send one home? Convenient for you and demonstrates that you're engaging with her literacy learning = win:win.

Jinty64 · 26/04/2013 13:09

After paying for two "lost" library books that had never come home I told the school we didn't want any more sent home. Ds could read them in the library or keep them in the classroom.

Just tell them you don't want one. I can't see it being a problem.

Scholes34 · 26/04/2013 13:39

I would hope you're able to go to a public library anyway to choose books together for all of your children. You'll find they're probably pretty much the same set of books anyway.

lljkk · 26/04/2013 13:47

Public library instead.

secretscwirrels · 26/04/2013 15:34

Take her to a public library. They often have storey time for toddlers and they will certainly have a wider choice of books.

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