Friends comments

[Moomoomee]

I went to lunch the other day with my friend from BC (before child). Anyway I was kinda dreading it as they wanted to go shopping then for lunch which DS (10 months) was going to get really bored with.

True to form after a while he starting fussing about vein strapped in buggy. He loves to walk now and bounce around. So I got him out and carried him for a while. Then I asked my friend if she would like to carry him.
She said sure and then kept saying to him "if you whinge then ill put you back in buggy, I'm not like mummy". Then he was a bit fussy in restaurant, only a bit, mind and I kept getting comments like, 'oh mummy's too nice to you', 'you can't always have your own way' etc. I dunno I felt like he's only 10 months!! He doesn't know how to sit still for ages.

Anyway she couldn't get away fast enough and I feel a bit deflated as we were good friends before :(

Flouncy how can you be intolerant of children if you've had you're own, are you the 'I only like my own' kind , genuine qn?

I have found now as apposed to recent years, its become more fashionable to be child intolerant.

Having your own makes you more intolerant of other people's in me experience. Everyone else is doing it differently to me, and I was doing it right, because if I'd thought I was doing it wrong, I wouldn't have been doing it that way IYSWIM!

But yes, I pretty much only did like my own, and those only in small doses. I'm not naturally child-friendly.

did you choose to have children?

I know that's personal, irl I know many people who describe themselves like you do, I just think why have them then?

Yes - and as I say, I LIKED mine!

When she has a baby, she'll be falling over herself to meet you. By which time you'll be enjoying the relative freedom (please note that I use the word freedom very loosely here) of a toddler or preschooler, and will be able to say lie about all manner of smug things like "Oh, is XX still not sleeping through? Why DS was 7-7 by 8 weeks".

Lol flouncy me too but it's not popular to say so I equate it to the changing nappies thing - like it's ok to ask another parent to change a nappy for your DC erm I would have preferred not to have to deal with anyone else's poo at all ta nevermind being expected to deal with someone else's DC's!

It's the same with pets, housekeeeping etc folks have different likes and tolerance levels, which I think is normal - friends find a balance or compromise if they want to stay friends.

Maybe the impatience is linked to having 'passed that stage' when your kids get older and not wanting to repeat it without the joy of it being your own new bubba

OP just think when your DF has a baby you may be just as 'gosh that's not how I did it' with her. Kids are an acquired taste for many, even parents :)

Ha well I'll try to keep the 'Oh really well DS was crawling/walking/piloting his own aircraft at X months' to a minimum because I hate competitive or know-it-all parents.

I don think matters are helped by the fact that I am a bit alternative blatant hippy in some parenting aspects which she raised eyebrows at a bit.