Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

It's the principal, not the money

38 replies

bigpaws · 24/04/2013 05:32

Keeping it as brief as possible -
My DD missed her school trip last week due to being unwell. I have asked the school for a refund of my trip money. Having asked twice, I was told it is being considered and someone will call you.
I am pissed off they haven't rung me to give an answer - do I take that as 'you cheeky cow, fancy asking'. But part of me thinks 'it was a voluntary contribution - why should I make donations towards school trips in the future?'
Please be honest and tell me if IABU?

OP posts:
NotSoWitty · 24/04/2013 05:37

YABU they would have had to pay for your daughter even if she didn't attend because she was sick.

nooka · 24/04/2013 05:38

I'm sorry that your dd missed the trip but why do you think you should get the money back? Presumably the school still paid for the cost of her going on the trip (travel, tickets etc) I doubt very much that they were able to recoup any funds.

PorridgeBrain · 24/04/2013 05:40

Well from the school's perspective I guess, they will have paid out in advance for the coach, facilities etc so won't be getting a refund themselves

Although voluntary, if they don't receive enough money, it comes out of their school budget which means less funds for other things.Our school has currently sent out a letter for a school trip and said if they don't get enough funds, they will cancel it.

I appreciate its frustrating when your child is sick as it is when you pay out for holidays and trips as a family and you have to cancel due to illness but for me, it's just one of those things and I would personally leave it as it is

MidniteScribbler · 24/04/2013 05:45

Oh suck it up. The school would have already paid for her DDs share of the trip. God some people have more arse than class.

Numberlock · 24/04/2013 06:01

How much was it anyway?

Alligatorpie · 24/04/2013 06:15

Depends on the trip. I always try to refund parents if their child is absent after committing to a field trip. Or at least i try to refund the entrance fee ( might have to forgo any transportation costs)
Yanbu

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 24/04/2013 06:22

YANU - the school will hvae had to pay for the transport, and her entrance.

Blissx · 24/04/2013 06:34

They say 'voluntary contributions' so as not to offend those that cannot afford trips. There will be a small fund available for disadvantaged pupils,who wouldn't able to go on field trips etc. otherwise. YABU. Your refund will probably, come out of this very necessary fund.

claraschu · 24/04/2013 06:38

What principle is involved here?

NotTreadingGrapes · 24/04/2013 06:42

If it was a 3 week field trip to the Galapagos, maybe.

An afternoon at a tramway museum, perhaps not.

christinarossetti · 24/04/2013 06:43

How much was it, do you mind me asking?

SwishSwoshSwoosh · 24/04/2013 07:01

Seriously? I think the school are trying to be polite in the face of your rudeness. That money is already spent.

jojane · 24/04/2013 07:05

My Ds missed a panto trip due to being unwell, a month or so later a refund got sent home, I hadn't even thought about a refund.

AgentProvocateur · 24/04/2013 07:06

I'm amazed that you asked for it once, never mind twice. The school will have paid for everything in advance. You need to let this go. There is no principle involved that I can see.

SkinnybitchWannabe · 24/04/2013 07:10

M

SkinnybitchWannabe · 24/04/2013 07:12

Sorry damn phone!
My ds broke his wrist just before his school trip. We got all our money back, but if he had been 'poorly' I doubt we would have got anything.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 24/04/2013 07:13

Unless they had been able to find someone to take her place, that money shouldn't come back to you. They spent it. There was an empty seat on the coach, an empty place wherever they were going to.

It's unfortunate but think of it like any other thing you buy tickets for - if you can't show up on the day, they don't give you your money back!

My youngest has music lessons. £8 a time. He's missed a couple due to illness. I haven't even asked about it. She was there. He wasn't. She gets paid.

It's the same thing, imo.

Tailtwister · 24/04/2013 07:14

I agree that you're unlikely to get a refund since the money will have likely already been spent. They should confirm with you one way or the other though since you asked, but I'm guessing they're hoping you'll let it slide. I would just let it go tbh.

twofingerstoGideon · 24/04/2013 07:14

OP, YABU.
MidniteScribbler - why the rudeness? Was it really necessary?
Swish - where has OP been rude? She has simply asked for a refund. Perhaps she needs the money.
Zheesh.

ryanboy · 24/04/2013 07:16

You won't get it back- it is a voluntary donation not a payment for a service

NorksAreMessy · 24/04/2013 07:26

I have been asked for £3.50 back for a child who missed one of my clubs. (independent school)
Usually I say to the children to come and get some beads, or come twice the next week to make up for it, but the mum wasn't having any of that.

I took £3.50 out of my purse then and there and felt very sad doing it. I wonder if she tries this on with violin lessons at £14 for 20 minutes?

Original poster
bigpaws · 24/04/2013 07:49

The cost of the trip was £15. Free entry to the visit, so just travel cost.

I have other communication issues with the school, so I suppose I am letting this rage me more than I usually would.

Yes, I am struggling to meet the daily cost of living - so £15 would come in handy. Also, I am self employed - so my experience is I would refund clients if I failed to provide a service.

I hope this explains a few of my reasons. And NO, I am not an arse without class ;-)

OP posts:
happystory · 24/04/2013 07:51

They didn't 'fail to provide a service.' The trip went ahead. YABU

pooka · 24/04/2013 07:56

YABU.

The school didn't fail to provide a service. Your daughter was unfortunately unwell and unable to attend. If they were travelling by coach, the coach would have been paid for and the contributions would have reflected the cost of booking for the number of children going.

I think it is very poor form to ask for a refund.

If you were sick and unable to do your work woud you still ask for your client to pay regardless?

IceCubes · 24/04/2013 07:57

To be fair to the OP, I've always received the money back if DS1 misses a trip, and I've never asked for it!

If trip money is an issue in the future, the school cannot make you pay for trips that are necessary for the curriculum if you are experiencing a financial hardship. It's best to discuss it in advance though as they will be more willing to help.