It all seems to be Faux-leather beds and "Swarovski elements" crap and twigs and pebbly shit. Even the "Egyptian Cotton" sheets are only 200 Thread Count. It's beyond the pale.
I don't want 80% off an online accounting course. I want 80% off Farrow and Ball Paints and reclaimed oak flooring. But you never see that oh no. 
Every day I await the email. Every time my heart sinks. I wanted Diptyque candles. What do I get offered? Fucking Glade "Sense and Spray"
I waited in vain for the merest hint of a Jo Malone offer. What do I get? Rhianna bloody Rhebelle.
Today was the last straw. I've been looking for a yurt for ages and my heart leapt at the sight of one. And then I realised the offer was for LED solar sodding fairy lights. Cruel, just cruel.
AIBU?