To not want ds to get an ipad

[99problems]

He's going to be 5 in June, so many friends have got their children Ipads and are telling me they are really educational and I'm being silly by not considering getting one for ds. I just hate the hold online games have over him when I let him go on my laptop to play educational games.

Ds has some minor special needs and my friend was telling me yesterday Ipad apps would be really beneficial to help him to write - he has no interest whatsoever in sitting down with pen/paper and doing it so I can imagine it could help, but still I don't feel comfortable with the idea. AIBU?

I'm a speech and language therapist and I work with under 5s. When meeting a new family, we always ask about what the child likes to do/play with and about 80% of the time the first thing the parents say is 'iPad'. This is a recent change in the last 12 months or so.

A lot of parents think the iPad is really useful for teaching children things and helping them with their language skills, but actually the most important toy/app to help with language development is another person! Screen-based toys also do nothing to develop the really early communication skills like waiting, looking, mirroring, taking turns, listening, joint attention - whenever you want, you just press a button and the screen changes. There's no waiting involved. Obviously, real people don't work like this so it's not preparing them at all for social interaction with other complex human beings.

I do think that playing a game with your child on an iPad could have its benefits but I do worry how much time children are spending glued to them, not just at home but wherever there is a bit of waiting involved. So on balance I'm not a fan either and there is no reason at all to buy one especially for a child.

Lottapianos

One reason to buy one is that they would enjoy it! Our son loves it.

20 minutes iPad and 40 minutes TV day are fine, given that the other 10 hours a day he is interacting with other human beings

Many computer games are also very mathematical and require problem solving and logic which may or may not help in the long room, but really enjoyment is they key thing

'20 minutes iPad and 40 minutes TV day are fine, given that the other 10 hours a day he is interacting with other human beings'

Absolutely, totally fine. Personally I think it's a shocking amount of money to spend on something for a child to use, but that's your decision. I guess what I meant is that there is no reason a parent should feel that they must buy one for their child, or that they will be holding the child back somehow if they don't buy one.

I work with some families where virtually every moment that the child is at home and awake, they are in front of a screen. That is hugely worrying.

YANBU!

Personally I don't think kids need gadgets, fair enough if they have access to them at school / nursery that's fine, but I honestly don't think they need them at home.

I have friends who have got their kids handheld gaming gadgets and have lived to regret it, because the kids have turned into incredibly unsociable people who can't go anywhere without their said gadget and now have no idea how to socialise with their peers or hold conversations because their life has been sucked out of them by the gaming gadgets they can't live without.

DD is nearly 2 and has been using my iPad for a few months now. Her ability to navigate it is astounding, she knows exactly where things are, how to stop videos, how to change apps, etc. and her skills with it have grown enormously, e.g. the drag and drop puzzles. There are loads of games that you can play with your child, e.g. sound games where you ask the child to identify the animal and predict what sound it will make, as well as fun music (DD does a mean Gangnam style!).

If you do get one, just be careful what you do with your credit card details and beware "free" apps that are anything but!

YANBU.

I don't see how having an iPad is necessary for a 5 yr old, especially if you're uncomfortable with the "hold online games have over him when I let him go on my laptop to play educational games."

I'd consider buying one for the family though, if I thought that some iPad apps really would be helpful for a DC. But not one exclusively for the use of a 5 yr old.

99problems - I will pm you, after they have been. It is ds's SALT and a SALT who specialises in AAC (augamentative and alternative communication).

Lotta, I specified that it depends on the individual child, but for ds the ipad has been great - especially with things like injini - with matching games and puzzles, he does these off the ipad too, but it is a lot more difficult for him to do them because of poor fine motor skills. It is also great for times in hospital and appointments. We limit the time using it and use it as a reward as well. As you say it is a tool, not the be all and end all. But it can be a very useful tool, and they will be used in education, and for children with sn, a lot more in the future.

I was alarmed when I saw a family on holiday- American I think, they had four very young children and they each had their own iPad.
Yanbu- possibly if you had a family one you could let him play occasionally but I feel ridiculously young for him to have his own.

99problems - have pm'd you about SALT visit