HELP! Police at my door - apparently I have committed an offence.........

[TheAccused]

Police just came as they have received a complaint against me.

Yesterday afternoon I nip to Tesco after school pick up. No P&C spaces so I park further down in a row of which is almost all empty spaces. I have a large 7 seater (4 DC) and get fed up of people parking so close that I can't get the toddler into his car seat without a struggle, so I park a quarter way over the next space hoping no one will park in that space as there are plenty more empty spaces next to it. I rush round, get a call from DD as she has forgotten her keys and is waiting outside the front door at home, so go quicker, get outside and find some BUFFOON has parked in the space I have parked over, so close that I can only just about get the door open on the toddler's side. The next space was empty!

As a see this, I hold my hands up and say to the DC, 'For gods sake, why did this idiot have to park so close' not seeing that there is a teenage boy sat in the car. I was not actually talking TO him at that point.

Conversation then goes something like this:
Boy shouts out 'my dad parked it not me'. I say something like, 'well you should tell him that I parked like this so I could get my child in car, now I can't, he could have parked further along'. He says' you should'nt have parked over the line'. I tell him I can park where I like, there's no law against it. He says 'well we can park where we like as well'. I tell him it would be common decency for his father to make sure the next car can open their doors. As I am in a rush, I try to squeeze DS through the door, hitting his head in the process. He starts crying. The boy in the next car laughs. I take the trolley back muttering 'tosser' to myself and give him an evil stare as I drive off furious at myself for not parking in the middle of 2 spaces and for even having a dialogue with the boy.

So police just came and said I had committed a public disorder offence as I was 'shouting, screaming and swearing' at the boy which has left him very shaken as he suffers from anxiety. The boy wants a written apology from me and if I do that, it will not go any further. Otherwise I will have be interviewed and give a written statement.

I have said that I am not apologising as I have not committed any offence and the boy was mouthing back to me very confidently and did definitely not look anxious to me! I do actually suffer from anxiety and depression and this has completely knocked me for 6.

The police will call me to arrange an interview next week. I can't believe it. I am pretty sure I did not even raise my voice. There was no one else about except my DCs and they are adamant I did not shout or swear (I have even started doubting myself). I am going back to the store on Monday to request the CCTV footage but they are not sure if anything will show up in the car park and it probably won't have picked up my voice anyway to prove I was not shouting.

I cannot understand how the police can tell me that if I write an apology, they will drop it, when they have no proof that I did anything. They were making out I was guilty . Does this constitute a public disorder offence? I was just about to go out with the DCs to park before the police came. I am frozen with fear now.

[Chandon]

if the car park was so empty, why was it necessary to park over 2 spaces? You could have just parked between 2 empty bays and opened your doors as wide as you can?

Anyway, I hope this is a wind up thread and did not really happen.

[TentativeWhistleBlower]

Tbh, I think you were out of order for parking over the line. I also think you were out of order by having a go at the boy

HOWEVER...

I really don't think the police have dealt with this well, if you feel they were trying to force, or trick you into admitting fault, I would put in a complaint. It was a very small incident that should have been dealt with appropriately, and I don't think coming to yor door and intimidating you was an appropriate way.

[pleasestoptalking]

It sounds like you were in the wrong.

Depends how strongly you feel about it. Either don't write the letter and see what happens or write the letter and move on.

In future park more considerately and don't put yourself in that position.

[RhondaJean]

I'd have looked fucking sweet apologising.

I thought you were going to say you had keyed the other car or banged your door into it and caused damage.

Really, this is all my our local police force have to worry about?

I'd be lodging a complaint about the way the police officer handled it tbh. Formally. Especially if the supposed complainant aghast even given a statement.

[CloudsAndTrees]

And what makes you so sure that this guy was thinking about pissing you off when he parked and left his child in the car? You certainly must think a lot of yourself if you think a complete stranger would bother giving you and your toddler that much thought.

[Salmotrutta]

Actually, someone parked right on the line next to me at work yesterday (after I had parked up).

I had to slither into the car.

Very annoying BUT I didn't call her a tosser.

That would have caused frosty work relationships.

[TheAccused]

I did not have a 'go' at the bloody kid. How did you deduce that? Or can adults not speak to kids without it being deemed at 'having a go' at them. I was replying to him.

[pickledginger]

You don't get to park over the lines of a space. Even if the car park is empty. Even if you drive a tank.

[TheAccused]

Still don't get how I am in the wrong . Yes in future I shall park right in the middle of 2 bays don't worry.

[MrsMacFarlane]

OP I think you just need to let it go now. You got a fright, but the fact that the boy won't make a statement is a tacit admission that he made the whole thing up as he cannot stand by what he said. For your mental health's sake, draw a line under it and move on.

[RhondaJean]

Oh, you may want to reconsider your parking in future though. I do get your frustrations, the other night it was really really windy here and the supermarket car park was quiet so I deliberately parked miles from anyone else, even though I had to walk further. Whe n I got back, someone had parked right tight next to me in the next space even though there were loads of spaces in the car park with no one next to them - resulting in me struggling with the door in the wind to make sure it didn't damage their car, the exact reason I parked miles away from anyone in the first place.

A little common sense in parking sometimes!

[Moominsarehippos]

What a waste of police time (unless the OP keyed the other car and threatened to kill the teenager).

We have a monster car too but don't go over two spaces. We're in London so would probably have the paintwork keyed if we did.

I'm not sure if I'd ignore, demand a letter from the teen to my son for laughing at him smacking his head, or write the bloody letter. Sorry that's no help whatsoever but I am crap at making decisions. Last time I have to write an apology (to a teacher) was when I used a mild expletive when I fell in the mud during a PE lesson and gouged my knee.

[Ashoething]

IF this is true then get yourself a solicitor,go to the interview and say no comment to every question they ask you. They will drop it like a hot potato.

[eminemmerdale]

I was parking in a car park once - a pay machine one and a trafiic warden said to me that parking over the line is an offence (shit parker, me) so there you go. Still completey OTT of the police, the boy and the father though.

[SarahAndFuck]

So are you a name-changing regular OP?

[Guitargirl]

What would happen if everyone decided to take up 2 spaces when they went food shopping? The lines are there for a reason. Yes, there were spaces when you arrived but by the time you had got down the first aisle of the supermarket that car park could have been full.

Think about it from the other driver's perspective for a moment. He/she drove to the supermarket, found a spot to park (just about), nipped in to shop and when returned to the car discovered that the driver of the car next door who had parked badly had been verbally abusive to his (anxious) son who was sitting in the car.

Swears at a child and then posts about it on a parenting forum and expects to get support. Why? Because she has a large car which she can't park properly.

Can't you see that this is how it might appear?

[fallon8]

Far better now..she does not need a seven sweater car,it's obvious...go and get parking /driving lessons...that's not being rude,that's common sense and shows respect for the rest of us.
I would meet with the family,but put the teenager/me situation to my advantage,which he won't be expecting

[sherazade]

You parked selfishly and then you asked a minor who had nothing to do with the car to pass on a a message to his dad and then got into a petty argument with the said minor. which I think is quite mean.
But way out of proportion for police to turn up, that is beyond outrageous.

[ChunkyPickle]

I am in STITCHES at how incensed people are that someone parked over a car-parking line next to a load of empty spaces. - they're guidelines, not some life and death rule that must be obeyed

Seriously - none of you should ever move abroad to some of the places I've lived, you'd die of a heart attack your first trip to town!

OP, you did nothing wrong, I'm shocked the police bothered (perhaps because he was a minor), laugh about it and move on

[Salmotrutta]

But if the boy and his dad told the police that the OP was screaming and swearing at the boy then you would expect the police to do something wouldn't you?

If it was your child who told you some random woman had done that?

We don't know how much the boy embellished the truth - so the police would act on it.

[magimedi]

To my mind the whole question of the police wasting time & possible harassment is far more important than the bloody parking.