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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To absolutely hate soft play parties...so much that when I know I have to attend one..

157 replies

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 15/04/2013 13:25

it ruins my entire day. I can't BEAR the places...we never visit them as a family because the noise and constant selling of crap annoys the hell out of me.

DD2 is 5 and has 2 this week. The parties are both for good friends of hers.

She's not comortable with me leaving her with a friend's mum yet so I have to stay. DH can't take her...they're both at 4.00pm.

I HATE THEM! Sitting for 2 hours in a loud, grubby place and being obliged to spend 8 quid on 2 coffees just to have something to do.

Am I alone? My hatred of them seems quite imbalanced almost.

OP posts:

SpanishFly · 16/04/2013 07:38

To be fair I've never been at a soft play thats as awful as some of you are describing. We've got a couple of quite nice ones near us. I used to quite like when ds1 was old enough to disappear for an hour while I had coffee and read a book with my feet up. Was a lot less stressful than many of the other options

ll31 · 16/04/2013 07:48

It's how long-two hours? Won't kill you

anniroc · 16/04/2013 07:54

Am genuinely shocked about the poo/uncleanliness mentioned. Ours aren't like that but then we live in a very smug m.class area. YABU - I love soft play, but then our children are still very young and I just like having a bit of a rest and cup of coffee!

kungfupannda · 16/04/2013 08:37

I've a fair few gripes with soft play - mainly related to parents who smile benignly while their ten year-old flattens toddlers in the under-three section and then gets all huffy when I scream "Out! OUT!" at said ten-year old - but I've never been to one which isn't clean and vaguely comfortable.

We've got a fair few within driving distance. One is huge and expensive and has very nice tea and cake, but gets absolutely rammed during the holidays or after school. One is smaller and family run with a pretty basic cafe, but tables right next to an enclosed toddler section so DS2 can do his own thing while I drink tea and pretend I'm somewhere else. We've also got a tiny one with a nice cafe, big windows (why does softplay never have windows?) and again, tables right next to a big toddler area.

MrsCosmopilite · 16/04/2013 08:40

Our nearest one is good.

It's clean, coffee is decent. Slightly lower than average cafe prices for the area, and they do snacks. Toilets, changing facilities and plenty of seating for adults.

Admission charge is per child but seemingly no limit on adults. We took DD and it cost us £4.25 to get in. For as long as we wanted.

My only criticism of our nearest is that it's too small!

aldiwhore · 16/04/2013 08:43

Our local one is probably perfect. It's clean, fairly cheap, healthy food and they have a strict child limit so it's never overcrowded.

It is still hell on earth though.

I would probably work on extolling the virtues of partying without mummy to your dd!!

Original poster

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 16/04/2013 09:03

We have two...one u[p the road from me is nice...clean and well managed....the one yesterday was 4 miles out of town on an industrial estate in a less salubrious part of town...it does a cheaper deal. I don't blame parents for going there but I also think ffs WHY have a party for the whole class in this shithole....if you can't afford the decent one then why not have 3 or 4 kids over for a tea party?

OP posts:

BegoniaBampot · 16/04/2013 09:14

is it really trendy these days to be above all this kind of stuff and sneer at it? I always quite enjoyed soft play (some much more than others), usually an easy few hours sitting on a couch chatting or reading while your kid has a ball and gets loads of exercise, especially when the weather is crap.

Wallison · 16/04/2013 09:34

If it's trendy then I am a trail-blazer because I've always hated them. And I have never managed to sit and read a book and relax etc at them; it's just not a relaxing environment. The noise!

MandragoraWurzelstock · 16/04/2013 09:55

Oh God, not said any of this because it's 'trendy' They just genuinely give me the fear. I wish I was more relaxed about it.

MandragoraWurzelstock · 16/04/2013 09:57

not sneering either. some of the best parents I know have parties there. I'm just choosing my battles iyswim. If we go to something I can't stand it makes me a crap parent for the rest of the day. I admire people who are more laid back.

Scottishtanguera · 16/04/2013 09:59

OP, YADNBU. I agree with what most have said here - soft play are vile, noisy, smelly, expensive and soft play parties are a special kind of hell. Even though it's short, it's still the longest 2 hours of your life.
yy to what someone said about having to make small talk with the other parents then shuffle into a room to watch our kids eat!

Im genuinely envious of those who can take a book/magazine and "relax" while their kids play. Granted, it's a lot easier when they reach the age where you no longer have to go in with them to the wee-smelling ball pits, but relax?? I wish I was capable of blocking out that much noise.
I leave with a headache. Everytime.

Floggingmolly · 16/04/2013 11:26

Jesus! Is it "trendy" to dislike soft play?.

Some of the "best" parents have parties there... Go or don't go, it doesn't make it any better or worse that complete strangers have validated your choices, ffs.

bedmonster · 16/04/2013 11:49

I love soft play, especially with DS when it's term time and generally very quiet. We have about 6 within a 10 minute drive of us, and none of them have ever had piles of shit lying about when i've been to them. I would be disgusted and wouldn't be in a hurry to return. The 2 I like best have good food for adults and children, are clean and have clean loos. I don't drink coffee or tea, so I couldn't tell you if they were overpriced or not.
They are an excellent place to take all 3 of my DC to, although at the weekends it's a totally different kettle of fish as it's so busy and noisy. But if we go, we get there for when it opens and stay an hour or 2 before it gets very busy. I can think if relatively few indoor activities that appeal to the different age ranges of them all, but soft play is one of them.
Having said that, I wouldn't be staying at a party, it would be a drop and run situation. I cba with making small talk with.

bedmonster · 16/04/2013 11:49

That last with shouldn't be there!

MandragoraWurzelstock · 16/04/2013 11:59

FloggingMolly what is your problem with what I posted? Someone asked/assumed I/others were sneering.

I wanted to reassure them that I wasn't sneering. And yes it is true that some of the best parents I know have their kids' parties there. I'm saying that I don't consider people who go to soft play to be beneath me in any way. Just more tolerant.

MandragoraWurzelstock · 16/04/2013 12:01

Do you think that it's wrong to say 'best' parents? I'm talking about people I think are really good parents. Better parents than I am.

I don't understand what's wrong with that.

MarvinMedium · 16/04/2013 12:11

I stopped taking DSs to soft play parties the day DNeice came home from one covered in someone elses poo...in fact they were all covered in someone elses poo.

Didn't miss it though mind - also hated sitting in the park watching them play on the slides / swings and get pushed around (not in a good way) by bigger kids. Give me a nice doggy nature walk any time

MarvinMedium · 16/04/2013 12:12

Ah just read the thread now and realised that makes me a bit of a snob or something

MandragoraWurzelstock · 16/04/2013 12:13

No, it doesn't Marvin - I think only one person commented that people thought themselves above that kind of thing because it's trendy.

I don't think most people think that. I hope not anyway.

MarvinMedium · 16/04/2013 12:16

I find it's the middle class centre parks parents round here who have the parties at softplay anyway.

I also worried there was too much scope for injury - all those swinging padded bars and bottoms of slides...esp with the littler ones.

Floggingmolly · 16/04/2013 12:16

I didn't think you were sneering, Mandragora, just, you know, soft play is sheer hell soft play, the fact that what you define as better parents take their children there doesn't make it any more or less palatable than it would be anyway.

MandragoraWurzelstock · 16/04/2013 12:29

God I can't win

BegoniaBampot · 16/04/2013 13:34

MarvinMedium - so where do the non middle class/centre park folk have their parties?

i've always noticed centre parks gets sneered at on here as well.

MidniteScribbler · 16/04/2013 14:13

If I have to go to a party with parents that I can't stand, then I take the laptop and a handful of very official books. Mutterings of "Due this week" and "Can barely spare the time for poor DS to get to a party" seem to be enough to get other parents giving you sympathetic looks and buying you coffee while you "keep at it".

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