Knew I was in for a mouthful again from DM.
Shazjack1 · 11/04/2013 11:49
I knew before a rang DM simply to ask her to come for dinner on a different day than Sunday sometimes, that I was going to get an earful about how I've ruined her routine and what her friends will think about it! All I said was could you come maybe on a thurs or fri sometimes as its better for me.
She has the capacity to make me feel guilty or every little thing.
Now she's saying that she won't bother coming on Sunday as she's 'obviously not welcome'. Why does she dramatise everything! I feel like crap now.
musickeepsmesane · 11/04/2013 11:57
You see her every Sunday for dinner?! Well done you. Personally I wouldn't dream on imposing on my kids like that. She is being very unreasonable to complain. If I were you I would take this opportunity to say 'as other days clearly don't suit, we should do every second Sunday'.
Stop feeling like crap. She is the one with the problem, not you.
WhereYouLeftIt · 11/04/2013 12:10
"Now she's saying that she won't bother coming on Sunday as she's 'obviously not welcome'."
Good. It sounds like you could do with having a break from her.
Your mother is being unreasonable. She is NOT behaving like an adult, so I'd suggest you treat her like the tantrumming toddler that she is. She is on the naughty step (translation - not invited to dinner) until she apologises.
Goldmandra · 11/04/2013 14:29
I have been where you are. In the end DH's feelings about wanting the odd Sunday to be free to do something else prevailed. I took the tears and the tantrums and then the not speaking on the chin. Now we havea much more flexible arrangement whereby my parents come to us sometimes, we go to them sometimes and on some weekends we just don't see them, e.g. this weekend because we've seen them three times this week and our weekend is very busy.
I know it's hard but you are being perfectly reasonable so quietly and calmly stand your ground and wait until she realises that, in this instance, she is not the centre of the universe and other people are allowed to make their own weekend plans too.
IT WILL BE WORTH IT
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