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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about how much to pay for my dance costume?

35 replies

MixedBerries · 10/04/2013 11:06

Really not sure about this. It's not a serious matter, nor is it keeping me awake at night but just wondering what everyone else thinks...

I'm part of a dance group and we're performing at a festival in July. At first, the festival date clashed with my family's holiday so I said I couldn't perform with them. Our teacher went ahead and bought costumes for the group which cost £40 each in the shop and so this is what she charged the others.

The festival date has now been moved which means I CAN perform after all. Teacher said this was fine if I could find the same costume elsewhere as the shop she bought from had sold out. I found the costume (dress) on ebay and bought it for £9.99 myself. The teacher is now asking me to pay her £30 as everyone else had to pay £40 for theirs and it's not fair mine only cost me £9.99.

Is she BU to ask me to give her £30 to make up the difference? Or should the rest of the group just have to live with the fact I bought mine cheaper? I could pay it just for the sake of harmony but I'm wondering about the principle.

OP posts:
LIZS · 10/04/2013 11:09

If you sourced and bought it , how does she know how much you paid. You don't owe her for it .

Wommer · 10/04/2013 11:12

What?!
She's being ridiculous and yandbu!
The only possible reasoning I can think of is that all of the costumes cost her around a tenner each and there are other expenses up to about £30 which she's lumped under the same heading....

Can you ask her exactly what she's going to do with the £30?
If its just going in her back pocket (although don't expect her to actually say that) then no absolutely not!
If its for other stuff (wracking brain here!) make up, hair stuff, tights (?!!), mini bus hire? And she can specify then yes maybe.

Kormachameleon · 10/04/2013 11:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
MixedBerries · 10/04/2013 11:12

Thanks LIZS. She knows what I paid as I showed it to her online just to check it was exactly the same as the others. She saw the price then. The others don't know how much it cost though.

OP posts:
HoHoHoNoYouDont · 10/04/2013 11:14

Shock Words almost fail me at the cheek of this woman.

PLEASE promise me you will not pay her the money.

Original poster
MixedBerries · 10/04/2013 11:28

Hmmm. So far it's a consensus. I'm just reluctant to rock the boat as she's a nice lady, does not make much money through teaching us (although I think she enjoys it more than most of us) and we live in a fairly small community where grudges last a long time!

OP posts:
annh · 10/04/2013 11:30

Have you asked her what she is planning to do with the £30? And why didn't she buy everyone's costume from Ebay as the price is so much better?

LIZS · 10/04/2013 11:31

or did she and pocket the dfference ?

edwardsmum11 · 10/04/2013 11:33

I wonder if she pocketed the extra and got it for same price as yours. I wouldn't give her the difference.

Original poster
MixedBerries · 10/04/2013 11:35

She's just going to pocket the difference to make it fair to the others as far as I know. There are no other costs involved.

She was adamant that she charged others £40 because that's exactly what they cost in the shop. I can't verify this but I believe her.

I guess she didn't get them all on ebay as the one I bought is a one-off sale- they weren't abundant or in many different sizes as would have been needed for the whole group.

OP posts:
HazleNutt · 10/04/2013 11:38

Huh? Why on earth would YOU pay HER the difference? How is it even her business how much you paid for the costume?

BackforGood · 10/04/2013 11:41

Unbelieveable ! Apart from anything else, no-one else need know yours was cheaper, but even if it was, it's irrelevant. She asked you to get the costume, which you did. Would she have been reimbursing you if you'd had to pay out £50 ? I could sort of understand her trying it on if she'd got the costume for you, but she didn't, so there's no 'case' to answer.

kinkyfuckery · 10/04/2013 11:42

What a cheeky cow. Unless the £30 involves other costs, tell her to do one!

UniqueAndAmazing · 10/04/2013 11:43

WTF?
Confused

surely the others paid her "£40 to cover the cost of buying it

you bought your own costume so you paid the cost of buying it

the woman is a complete and utter imbecile!

Angelico · 10/04/2013 11:48

Bonkers. YANBU. She is BVVVVU.

CheeseandPickledOnion · 10/04/2013 11:48

YANBU. WTF? Their costumes cost £40 so they paid £40. You found yours for £10, so you pay £10. Why on earth would you be giving her £30? Fucking nonsense.

MummytoKatie · 10/04/2013 12:03

Presumably your costume is second hand whilst theirs is all brand new so you are not paying for the same thing anyway?

Floggingmolly · 10/04/2013 12:05

Nut case!!! You saved the money, how would handing it over to her make it "fair" to everybody else? That's three year old logic.

LadyBeagleEyes · 10/04/2013 12:08

Why on earth would you give her £30, who would this be fair for?

MammaTJ · 10/04/2013 12:10

Ask her if she would be giving you £20 if yours was £60. I doubt very much if she would.

CwtchesAndCuddles · 10/04/2013 12:11

There is no way on earth I would be giving her the money!

She is bonkers..............

Floggingmolly · 10/04/2013 12:13

Good point, Mamma! That would be just as "fair".

zzzzz · 10/04/2013 12:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
MixedBerries · 10/04/2013 12:18

That IS a very good point MammaTJ. Ok. I'm decided. Just have to think about how to approach it now. Thanks everyone.

OP posts:
MummytoKatie · 10/04/2013 12:29

You could suggest you bring in some chocs or something for backstage if you wanted to be nice......

Of course then the others will know that you got your costume much cheaper and she may not want that....