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AIBU?

To think that Kirstie Allsopp is completely out of touch? RE Twitter

92 replies

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 14:28

I just saw this:

M&S worker
"You are completely wrong on this one, Frankie is a great stand up, you're coming across as a stuck up bitch."

Kirsty
"The next person that wants to call me vile, offensive & women bashing names better remove their employer from their profile, I fight mean!!"

M&S worker
"I'm sorry for what I said. I have no problem apologising. Just overreacted"

twitter.com/KirstieMAllsopp

This is in regards to Frankee Boyle and Thatcher.

Is it just me or is Allsopp being ridiculous?

OP posts:

Report

WilsonFrickett · 09/04/2013 15:42

But why should you assume because you're in the public eye someone will definitely, absolutely, call you a bitch (and a cunt?) Why should she? And what about the non-celeb women who get called equally bad names?

You are excusing misogyny because someone is well-known - that makes no sense to me. She wasn't complaining because she'd been disagreed with, she'd been complaining about the words used to silence her.

Viviennemary · 09/04/2013 15:43

I think she is coming across as a nasty bully and should be ashamed of herself.

I fight mean = inciting violence. She should be immediately suspended from her job.

Twentytotwo · 09/04/2013 15:44

'You are excusing misogyny because someone is well-known - that makes no sense to me. She wasn't complaining because she'd been disagreed with, she'd been complaining about the words used to silence her.'

^ This

wannabedomesticgoddess · 09/04/2013 15:45

So someone in the public eye should take whatever people throw at them and never retaliate?

OP, do yourself a favour and stop now. Every post you make gets worse.

Hulababy · 09/04/2013 15:46

There are many people out there who have lost their jobs or not been given jobs due to FB and Twitter profiles and this kind of thing. KA is not doing/saying anything new.

Teaching staff are often called up over it all the time, and some schools tell staff they shouldn't have an online profile at all.

It should be the same for any employee. You are called up on inappropriate behaviour, and if you are linking in your employer on your profile then you should be doubly aware that your employers may not be too impressed either.

Hulababy · 09/04/2013 15:47

Eh? It is very very clear in KA's tweet that "I fight mean" has nothing to do with inciting violence, and is talking about contacting the employer about someone's inappropriate behaviour.

SatsukiKusukabe · 09/04/2013 15:49

think vivianne us being sarcastic

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 15:52

You are excusing misogyny because someone is well-known - that makes no sense to me. She wasn't complaining because she'd been disagreed with, she'd been complaining about the words used to silence her

I am not excusing misogyny. I hope that I would never come across like that. The way that the person spoke to Allsopp was disgusting and unacceptable. Unfortunately it happens and getting upset over it will only make the misogynists win.

I feel that Allsopp did not respond in the right manner. I feel that responding with an intelligent and thought-provoking response would have been more suitable.

OP posts:

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 15:55

So someone in the public eye should take whatever people throw at them and never retaliate?

OP, do yourself a favour and stop now. Every post you make gets worse.

I can make my own decisions thank you. It would be a boring forum if we all agreed with each other wouldn't it?

OP posts:

WilsonFrickett · 09/04/2013 15:56

I don't feel that misogynists deserve intelligent and thought-provoking responses. I think they should just STFU. And you are coming across like you're excusing it, sorry, but you are.

And the school of thought that women should only ever be intelligent and thought-provoking and lady-like (I know you didn't use that word) is deeply sexist btw. Why shouldn't she 'fight mean'.

PeneloPeePitstop · 09/04/2013 15:57

Completely not to do with this thread but KA was a cow about carers to me.

Viviennemary · 09/04/2013 15:57

No I wasn't in a way. Because I think she is absolutely as bad as the person making the other remarks. That was the point I was trying to make. Somebody might report her for inciting violence.

Bowlersarm · 09/04/2013 15:58

OP I think it is you who is out of touch re twitter. Have you not been aware of the controversy surrounding Paris Brown's tweets in the last few days? It is inappropriate to name call, be racist sexist etc on twitter. Anyone can be called up in it and if they are representing their workplace, it is quite correct that they should be

wannabedomesticgoddess · 09/04/2013 15:58

When you are criticising a woman for standing up for herself it goes a little further than disagreeing.

danceponydance · 09/04/2013 16:06

OP What do you think would have been an appropriate response from KA? And have you actually read any of the other tweets relating to this?

Whether KA went about this the right or wrong way, the person calling her a cunt has apologised and acknowledged publicly that he was wrong to use that word - "bit (sic) I do regret what I said. Could of said it another way without being so insulting and crude."

Maybe he's trying very hard to back track so that he doesn't lose his job but it's now out there publicly that he knows his behaviour was wrong and it's been a warning to anyone else who might behave in the same way that there are repercussions if you do so.

The more that offensive words and phrases are used, the more normalised they become. Even if one fewer person uses these words and phrases publicly then it is less (even if it is marginal) likely that another person would think it is acceptable and appropriate to do so.

BreconBeBuggered · 09/04/2013 16:07

Isn't the distinction that Kirstie's comments are general, but the other person's tweet is directed @Kirstie? As for the comments regarding Frankie Boyle, well, that's why he posts that kind of thing, surely. Best ignored in a 'don't feed the trol'l way.

SatsukiKusukabe · 09/04/2013 16:08

only someone totally out of touch with reality would take it to mean kirsty fucking allsop was threatning to go to m&s and give someone a kicking. and not just let them know what a wanker their employee is.

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 16:10

I don't feel that misogynists deserve intelligent and thought-provoking responses. I think they should just STFU. And you are coming across like you're excusing it, sorry, but you are.

And the school of thought that women should only ever be intelligent and thought-provoking and lady-like (I know you didn't use that word) is deeply sexist btw. Why shouldn't she 'fight mean'.

She may fight mean if she likes, but that would make her just as bad as whomever said the original tweet.

I believe that everyone has the right to say what they like, regardless of how harsh it may be, we do not live in a society that silences people and you should be thankful that we don't. Unfortunately we have misogynists in our society. I wish we didn't, but we do. From my personal experience misogynists are normally people who need love and education. I would rather respond to them with something they could think about, rather than something to scare them.

I do not think that women should be intelligent, thought-provoking and lady-like all of the time. However in this particular instance I feel that an intelligent response would have been the best one.

OP posts:

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 16:14

OP What do you think would have been an appropriate response from KA? And have you actually read any of the other tweets relating to this?

No, I have not. I do not use Twitter.

As for an appropriate response I am not sure. I would have perhaps directed them to the actual dictionary definition of said word?

OP posts:

Bowlersarm · 09/04/2013 16:15

'However in this particular instance I feel that an intelligent response would have been the best one'

Well good for you. She clearly didn't

SatsukiKusukabe · 09/04/2013 16:17

you'd have told them what a cunt is.

well, yes, that would be them well and truly told.

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 16:24

you'd have told them what a cunt is. [...] well, yes, that would be them well and truly told.

Like I said, I am not too sure what my response would be, this is just one that came to mind. If you look up the meaning of the word in the dictionary then you would see that the first definition is listed as a 'vulva, or vagina'. This is quite simply part of female anatomy and I would question why they feel that this is an appropriate name, or adjective, for myself.

OP posts:

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HairyGrotter · 09/04/2013 16:28

I actually got involved with this 'spat' last night, and she is a condescending twat. I didn't resort to name calling, but she is a dick

Twentytotwo · 09/04/2013 16:31

'getting upset over it will only make the misogynists win'

Wow. Really?

'I believe that everyone has the right to say what they like, regardless of how harsh it may be, we do not live in a society that silences people and you should be thankful that we don't'

You can believe it all you want but we don't all have the right to say what we want in the UK without consequences. There are laws against hate speech, laws that deal with threatening and abusive language and employee contracts and terms of use agreements that cover conduct (including speech or tweets.) It's misconduct to use certain language in the presence of coworkers. You can be arrested and face criminal charges for some language. As it should be.

Nokidsnoproblem · 09/04/2013 16:38

'getting upset over it will only make the misogynists win'. Wow. Really?

Surely that is what this type of misogynist wants? He/she insulted her, I'm assuming with the intent to upset her. Most people who throw insults around just want the insulted party to get upset and react. Why else would they do it?

OP posts:

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