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Is my washing machine BU (& mysoginist)?

10 replies

DialsMavis · 05/04/2013 14:46

Over the last few months all my clothes seem to be getting progressively tighter, especially around the stomach and bottom. Skinny jeans seem to be by far the worst. It's most peculiar that it only seems to be my clothes not DPs or DCs. Is it fair to conclude that it's some sort of patriarchal conspiracy and complain to zanussi? We have only had the machine a few months and I can't think of any other explanations for it happening. Has anyone else been affected?

OP posts:

Thistledew · 05/04/2013 15:03

It's the calories, I'm afraid. In case you haven't heard of them they are a type of bacteria that hide in your wardrobe and eat your clothes a little bit smaller each night. They have recently been found to be the source of the 'wardrobe shrinkage' phenomenon. The only way to get rid of them is to pick up your wardrobe and run up and down your stairs with it for half an hour a day. The small change in air pressure between your ground floor and upper floor, when repeated several times is enough to kill off the calories over a period of time.


purrpurr · 05/04/2013 15:07

Dials and Thistle, I luffs you, you have just cheered me right up. Wine for you!


HeathRobinson · 05/04/2013 15:08

Does the machine also lose socks?
There is some research to suggest that the heat and relative pressure inside a packed machine, results in a mini quantum vortex. If you're losing socks as well as losing size on your clothes, it's a bad one, sadly.


TheFallenNinja · 05/04/2013 15:10

Mine seems to enter the spin cycle right in the middle of a phone call.


MoonlightandRoses · 05/04/2013 16:07



Thistle - this calorie bacteria thingummy, there is one other way to sort them out - the imbibing of copious amounts of Wine means one stops caring about their presence. Wink


flatpackhamster · 05/04/2013 17:46

Calories are a patriarchal oppression to stop womyn enjoying cake and doughnuts and potato salad and fish and chips and croissants and bacon and eggs and roast dinners.


NorbertDentressangle · 05/04/2013 17:49

Leave the bastard!


AgentZigzag · 05/04/2013 21:50

Thistledew, brilliant, very very brilliant.

If I made sure I was tired just by watching him do it, would it be OK to make DH run up and down the stairs with the wardrobe? (that is if we had one, I've never said I don't have one on MN before, and now I've mentioned it on two threads in one night, as things come in threes it'll surely come up again before the night's out or my name's not Ivana Humpalot).


Fairylea · 05/04/2013 21:55

Replace the water supply with coke. Will fill out the skinny jeans again no problem.

(Bitterly eyes up skinny jeans and looks back to coke and chocolate).


KirstyJC · 05/04/2013 22:00

We have a Bosch one and the same thing is happening - perhaps it's a conspiracy involving all white goods manufacturers?

I recommend replacing all the affected clothes with baggy leggings/T shirts - they are less likely to be troubled with shrinkage and it does make one's expansive derriere look SO classy. You'll be the envy of all other Mums on the school run dontcha know....

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