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Original poster

Neighbour dispute about my car

55 replies

nitrox · 04/04/2013 08:16

Hi everyone,

Feeling totally bewildered by all this.

Yesterday I was in my livingroom at 7:30am and I heard a big smash outside. My car is parked in a marked parking bar on the road, 2 houses down the street, and a car had not seen it and smashed into the back of it.

Longstory cut short, she didn't see my car, admits liability, both cars will most likely be written off, I made her a drink, we called the Police and all was fine, amicable and friendly with her throughout.

My problem is with the neighbour of the house my car was parked outside of.

The street only has a few parking bays, we have a driveways but 2 cars in our household. My boyfriend uses the drive, I use the parking bays and I have a parking permit. One of the parking bays is outside this mans house, he has 1 car and a driveway and does not use this parking bay.

Her car was towed away within the hour, mine is being towed today hopefully, so it has been in the parking bay outside his house, the rear of it smashed in. Debris was swept off the road and into the gutter by the Police and they said I was fine to leave the car there until it was recovered.

So, to get to the point. Myself and my boyfriend walked up to my car around 7pm last night to look at it. A neighbour came past and said how awful it was that my car had been hit and gave her sympathies. The other neighbour came out and basically starting ranting away to us about when we were going to clean up the gutter of the mess... is the car moveable? it's my fault the mess is there as it's my car and I was involved whether I was in the car or not. He keeps his road clean and I should clean it all up now. He doesn't like me parking there because his relatives visit at the weekend and they have to park up the road and it's an inconvenience to him.

He said a lot to be honest and I was so shocked by his attitude (60 ish years old) that I can't remember a lot Blush. We were polite, didn't raise our voices or swear and he just kept getting more irate. In the end we walked back to our house as it was clear he was just having ago about me parking there and saying snide comments like " well, you won't be parking there again will you ".

Anyhow, sorry for the essay. I couldn't sleep last night and now we are considering moving house. My car has been hit a few times now; it's a busy and tight road, and this neighbours reaction has upset us.

My car will be recovered today and I really don't want to clean the gutter now. It's nearly all plastic from the other car, no glass.. and before he came out I was full intending to clear it up just to be polite and because that's just what you do. Half the mess is under my car and I can't get to it yet anyhow. I feel like he will be watching me and might come out again.

So, should I still clean it or leave it?

Sorry for the essay Blush stress of yesterday, work and my last month of Uni are all getting to me and I feel at the end of my tether Sad

OP posts:
Delayingtactic · 04/04/2013 08:57

You won't be able to make this man happy. If it wasn't this it'd be something else. I would just ignore him and feel sorry that he doesn't have anything else in his life.

By the way, I think it's really nice of you to help the poor woman who hit your car. In the heat of the moment we can be very self centred but you actually t

TarkaTheOtter · 04/04/2013 08:57

Have a lot of sympathy for your position, but "scummy chavs"? So it would have been ok for him to be rude to you if you were "chavs" but he should be polite because you are actually "professionals". Nice.

Delayingtactic · 04/04/2013 08:59

Crap.

Took the time to be nice. I hit the outer lane curb on a busy motorway as some teat swerved in front of me. A 4x4 driver 'shielded' my car as it limped to the hard shoulder (blown tyre) and then put up with me wailing as I was so frightened. I'm really appreciative of him - he could of just driven past.

quietlysuggests · 04/04/2013 09:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 09:05

Tarka - I think you know what I meant. Hmm I'm not saying it's okay, I'm saying he obviously had no respect for us as people because of his preconceptions on society labels, not my own.

I wouldn't say I was a "professional" either, I'm just a working class person.

Thanks Delayingtactic, I had a accident when I was younger, also not my fault and people were very nice to me and it meant a lot. I hope she passes that on too one day.

OP posts:
DontmindifIdo · 04/04/2013 09:10

People like htis don't listen to reason, they like getting in a flap and then will not even think that anyone else has a point of view.

If he says anything again loudly tell him to call the council or the police if he really thinks you've parked in his private bay. Tell him he knows full well it's a council road and anyone with a permit is allowed to park in it and you are refusing to discuss it with him further as he's obviously wrong and won't admit it.

olivertheoctopus · 04/04/2013 09:15

I'd clear it up once your car has been moved because its the right thing to do but balls to any of the shite your horrid neighbour has come out with. It's not his parking bay, you have a permit and he can fuck off!!

Suzieismyname · 04/04/2013 09:27

Clear up the mess but carry on parking your car in that spot. It's not his, no matter how frustrated he may feel. If it's so important to him then he should move to a house with a 3 car drive.
My DH gets really annoyed if he can't park right outside our house but it's a public road and we would never have a go at someone!

Whathaveiforgottentoday · 04/04/2013 09:33

Try to ignore him. He is absolutely in the wrong. We had a very similar neighbour who ccmpained about anybody who parked in 'his space'. We had to park there whilst our driveway was being laid and he scratched my car all the way down the passenger side. I know it was him as when I knocked on his door to see if he'd heard anything, I heard his wife saying 'she's seen you do it'. I was furious and involved the police who couldn't do anything. Some people are just nasty.

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 09:38

Oh dear Whathaveiforgotten, that's so awful! Shock I would be livid!

I think I will just carry on parking there if it's convenient for me, or up the road if not. I'm not being bullied out of parking in the street just because of him.

Looks like the car might no be collected until tomorrow, so that'll please him greatly!

OP posts:
Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 09:39

Suzie, exactly, he should move if it's such a problem.

He was so angry I thought he might have a heart attack, so I thought it best to walk away and let him calm down. Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 09:39

Also, if I don't park there, then people park then on and off all evening to go to the chip shop opposite.. that must irk him even more.

OP posts:
MrsKoala · 04/04/2013 09:45

SOme people are really peculiar about parking. It is very strange. We have issues on our street too. we can't park outside our house as there is road narrowing, a traffic calming post and humps. the opposite side has bays which face inwards iyswim. when we park outside certain neighbours houses they get really angry as they feel the bays are theirs. i can't drive and dh works away so sometimes the car is parked there for a couple of weeks. if so they report it abandoned and send us hate mail.

you will also find this attitude on mn sometimes. i once posted about it and was told by a few posters 'the space outside someones house is morally, if not legally, theirs' and one charmer told me i was lucky my neighbours hadn't put dog shit thru our letterbox as we deserved it - nice.

Whathaveiforgottentoday · 04/04/2013 09:50

nitrox he may well have a heart attack as my neighbour had a fatal heart attack about 4 months after the incident. Another neighbour went to the funeral as he felt he ought to and said there were only 4 people at the funeral and one of them was his wife.
I thought it was karma. Bit harsh but not a nice man,

ratspeaker · 04/04/2013 10:18

Ignore his ranting about where his visitors park. If they don't have a residents parking permit then they shouldn't be parking in the bay.
Not sure what it's like around your way but in Edinburgh the council wants proof of address before issuing a residents parking permit, they don't give out visitors permits.

As for the debris I'd clear it after the car has moved just because you are a nice person( and don't want any glass or debris getting in your tyres next time you park there )

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 10:43

Thanks for the comments.

The recovery are on their way and then I'll clean the mess up, just hope he doesn't come out and say anything else.. Confused don't want the hassle..

OP posts:
PurpleRayne · 04/04/2013 10:57

If he starts again just say you are finding his behaviour intimidating; if he carries on, report to police.

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 11:04

I just went out to the car as the recovery vehicle arrived.. had my broom and snow shovel in hand ready to clean up and he's done most it already! why didn't he just wait?

Anyhow, I was talking to the recovery guy and signing the forms and the neghbour came out and went to his car on his driveway, he didn't say anything though, but I left within 20 seconds of him coming out.

I've got to go get a temporary permit for the hire car and I think I might park in the space when I return. Blush

OP posts:
YellowDinosaur · 04/04/2013 11:14

He didn't say anything because he's a fucking bully and wouldn't dare when there is anyone else about Angry

MaidMiniEgg2012 · 04/04/2013 11:18

I had some pathetic neighbours a few years ago, if I parked an inch too close to what they percieved as "Their" space there would be hell on.

People can get very awkward about what they think is their parking space, they see it as an extension of their house, when usually its a public highway.

God, the bloody arguments I had with my neighbours, they used to enrage me. I lost my temper Blush once and lowered myself to their petty standards. I was 8 month pregnant in my defence and still they persisted in complaining about my parking. They had no idea how to talk to people.

OP take no notice of this silly man, remove any dangerous pieces of the smash as a matter of safety. He can go fuck off, he sounds like some sort of neighbourhood watch nosy git.

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 11:21

He is a bully yello yes.. but I'm not easily intimidated, I just don't like falling out with people, but I'll defend my right to park there..

Maid - he certainly is yes, I still can't get over his attitude.. and your neighbours sound awful! Shock I'm worried that he's upped his game now to try and get me to park elsewhere and it'll go downhill from here. I will just have to ignore him completely in future.

OP posts:
FryOneFatManic · 04/04/2013 11:38

This chap would have a knicker attack at the parking on my old street. It was narrow, all on-street parking down one side only and I'd get home wondering whether I'd be able to park near the house or not. It was rare I actually managed to park directly outside our house. We had two cars, and so did others so it was always a tight squeeze. Anyone trying to act possessive about the space in front of their house would have been roundly ignored.

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 12:48

Yeah, he would definately have a nervous breakdown in your old street!

It's not even bad around here at all, only he seems to have a problem, everyone else is fine with the parking situation.

He even has a garage that he sometimes puts the car inside, so he could do that and allow his visitors to park on his driveway, but he just wants exclusive rights to the parking bay.

OP posts:
DoJo · 04/04/2013 12:59

MrsKoala - I do appreciate that there is no ownership of bays outside your house (heaven only knows you have to where I live) but I do find it particularly frustrating when someone parks in a bay for weeks on end, knowing that they aren't going to move their car and making life that bit more difficult on a daily basis for someone who could make better use of it. One of our neighbours used to do this in the space right outside our house, and I never said anything because she's perfectly entitled to, but it was a bit annoying knowing that there are plenty of spaces a little further away that she could have used at no inconvenience to her. When I was about 7 months pregnant she came out to her car whilst I was stopped in the road unloading shopping and actually apologised and volunteered to park elsewhere when she knew she would be using her car for a while. She didn't have to, which made me even more grateful, but she did because it was no skin of her nose and made a big difference to me which I very much appreciated.

Original poster
nitrox · 04/04/2013 13:25

Dojo, I know what you are saying, and if he used the bay I would probably not park there, but he doesn't use it, only for visitors at the weekend, who for one off visits can walk for 40meters I'm sure.

I use my car nearly daily, so I think I have as much use out of it than anyone else would I suppose.

We are looking for a house with a double drive, just so the cars hopefully don't get hit, and a bit less hassle from misery neighbours.

OP posts: