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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that Bedtime Live on Channel 4 is unethical?

63 replies

NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 20:47

can't believe they have hidden cameras in children's bedrooms and broadcast footage live to the nation. I know they mean well but I think it is an abuse of power as the children cannot give their consent. I would not want to grow up and look back at a childhood which involved this happening to me. AIBU?

OP posts:
TroublesomeEx · 26/03/2013 21:14

OP I agree with you.

mum1979100 · 26/03/2013 21:14

I don't think he should be ashamed of being breastfed. But kids at school could discover footage and use it as a tool for teasing.

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:15

yes - children are being filmed in a very vulnerable situation - when they are out of control of their feelings, and struggling to develop. It is intimate. It is not like filming a child happily walking down the road. Yes the parents are sleep deprived and want help. But I say we need to imagine what it is like to be the child now and the child tomorrow and the child in ten years time. I still think it is an abuse of power although I appear to be in the minority. I work in Early Years and I am used to putting the child first and trying to see things from the point of view of the child of now and the adult of tomorrow.

P.s. what's OBEM?

OP posts:
LineRunnyEgg · 26/03/2013 21:15

But the presenter (watching the +1 version) just found the gok/boob situation a bit funny, didn't he, with the knowing glance to the co-presenter. That was a bit awkward.

LineRunnyEgg · 26/03/2013 21:16

One Born Every Minute, I think.

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:17

I think we could look back at this in a few years time and ask ourselves what exactly we were thinking, viewing this as acceptable.

OP posts:
CatelynStark · 26/03/2013 21:17

I have several spare grips, if anyone would like one?

Filming a child asleep in bed on a TV programme about children not wanting to go to sleep in a bed is not abuse. FFS.

mum1979100 · 26/03/2013 21:17

They aren't filming 'a child sleeping for a few minutes' they are filming them struggling to get to sleep. Rocking, screaming, shouting for mummy etc

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:18

it is an abuse of power.

OP posts:
MrsBW · 26/03/2013 21:19

How are they vulnerable????? I haven't watched it, but presumably their parents are in the vicinity??

What impact will this have on the children tomorrow or in 10 years time, do you think?? Confused

MajaBiene · 26/03/2013 21:19

It's a use of power definitely, I'm not so sure about abuse though.

Adults use their power over children all the time, I am not convinced that the use of power in making a child get a haircut or go to school is fine whereas using that power to put them on TV or facebook is abuse...

miaowmix · 26/03/2013 21:19

Oh pur-lease. It might not be the best show ever but abuse?
Lunacy

neveronamonday · 26/03/2013 21:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsBW · 26/03/2013 21:21

mum1979100 still a long way away from what I consider 'abuse'

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:21

But the children don't know they are being secretly filmed. Secretly filmed going through a difficult experience.
That's what I mean by abuse of power.
Using parental power to get a child to have a haircut or go to school isn't the same sort of thing at all. For a start, you don't have a secret camera filming the child screaming that they don't want a hair cut and then live streaming it to the nation.

OP posts:
LineRunnyEgg · 26/03/2013 21:22

It's about consent, for me.

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:23

LineRunnyEgg, yes that's it.

OP posts:
MrsBW · 26/03/2013 21:25

Children can't consent to photos being taken. Sometimes they're taken when the children don't even know. Sometimes those photos are shown to other people like grandparents (who may show their friends) again without the children's knowledge and/or consent.

Reasonable?

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:27

more reasonable than what was happening on this TV programme!
Depends on the photo though. I remember being aged about 7 and being extremely embarrassed about my cousin seeing toddler photos of me on the beach with nothing on.

OP posts:
MrsBW · 26/03/2013 21:27

There's an infamous photo of me aged 2 odd in a pushchair, smiling... and weeing myself. You can see the wee pouring out the bottom of the pushchair.

It's been passed around a gazillion friends and family to much hilarity.

Should I sue for invasion of privacy?? TBH until now, I hadn't given it a second thought...

LtEveDallas · 26/03/2013 21:29

I don't agree with it either OP. I don't think it's abuse, but I don't agree with it.

Original poster
NigellasGuest · 26/03/2013 21:29

anyway I know it's early but I'm going to bed now - not flouncing away because more people think IBU than not. Thank you to my supporters! I still stand by everything I've said. Good night. please don't secretly film me

OP posts:
WallyBantersJunkBox · 26/03/2013 21:30

Yes but you'd be perfectly within your rights to give your child a ridiculous haircut and let them face teasing for it. Just as you are perfectly entitled to dress them up as bumblebees or fairies without their consent that they feel foolish, no?

The underlying question is, are these parents allowing their children on tv to exploit or abuse them for personal gain, or are they trying to ensure they don't suffer increased hyperactivity and damaged physical and mental development, depression, self-harm, low concentration and poor performance at school? This is what the program is raising awareness of.

neveronamonday · 26/03/2013 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsBW · 26/03/2013 21:31

Goodnight NigellasGuest, sleep tight (genuine). Smile