Aibu to think it is impossible to follow current bf advice

[neunundneunzigluftballons]

I formula fed my first 2 and always put them in their own cot from day 1. With all that baby expertise? I decided I would always put my 3rd breast fed baby back into his cot after feeds like I had done before. however ds did not sleep for prolonged times at night between feeds and after a decent stint of good sleeping he had a sleep regression. I came to the realisation I either needed to give up best practice and formula feed or else give up best practise and keep him in the bed or maybe give him solids early against best practise. So my question is are women able to exclusively breast feed for 6 months and never bring the baby into their bed and if so is it at the expensive of their own well being. I think it is unreasonable to give advice that is totally impossible to put into practice but maybe I am unreasonable. By the way ds is still coming into our bed from his cot once he wakes up for a feed in the night at 15 months so that was the shortcut I chose.

I bf'd for 6m and never had dd in with me, I always put her back in the crib by our bed (I did swaddle her though with a thin zip swaddle). She slept reasonably well on breastmilk - cluster fed in the evening then did 5-6 hrs straight from a few weeks old. I tried formula once in the early weeks and she slept terribly as was awake with dreadful wind. I think it depends on the personality of the baby to a huge extent and not what you feed them - we don't question the fact that some adults are great sleepers and some aren't. I also second what the pp said that sleep regressions are normal and occur when sleep patterns change - get through them by doing whatever works! Also I never co-slept but there is a lot of info (including leaflets from hvs) about safe co-sleeping so I wouldn't say you're told it's bad practice exactly.

What's the connection between breastfeeding and them sleeping in your bed?!

Will he take anything from a bottle? If so a bottle of formula at night might help with sleeping. Tbh though, once on the breast babies are very resistant to bottles and formula.

Alternatively if he is 4 months a bit of baby rice mixed with bmilk is worth a try. DGS was ebf for 6 months and he still got odd patches of excema so it's not that important. Your sleep is more important than what experts say.

Its not about eczema or experts or sleep it's about their guts being too immature to digest food

Bedside cot?

I did it but was at expense of sleep.

Ended up cosleeping when he was 10mths old when ds and I picked up a d&v bug and have ever since.

Wow sneezecakesmum so much ignorance.

Bedside cot seems best idea to me

So is this really about whether ff babies sleep better than bf babies?

No not really it is actually about whether the best practice advice on bf in the country I am living in is possible to achieve? I thought it was the same advice in the UK which is why I asked on mumsnet but it seems the UK has moved on from saying that co sleeping is not best practice, we have not. I would have thought that you need to co sleep at least sometimes to breast feed exclusively for 6 months I was wrong others have managed it. However a lot of people here have said to co sleep which is not considered best practice where I am from and then have said I am being unreasonable .

Why I mentoined ff at all was because I found having a bf baby meant I had to change my expectations of what worked and I know every baby is different there are some commonalities between bf babies and ff babies in my experience

was meant to be

OP what about a bedside cot?

noble all night milk buffet that is hilarious!!!

My DD currently has this.
Must. Close. The. Buffet.

www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/Public_Health/publichealthdepts/resources/safesleep.pdf

For clarity

I think you are overthinking this OP - stop fixating on "best practice" and just do what works for you. If you would rather bottle feed, do it. If you would rather co-sleep, do it (safely).

Maybe it works for some but some pps generalisations are frankly obnoxious.

We co slept. I will never understand how any one manages to sit and feed awake at night and such like. There is such a thing as safe cosleeping just like there is such a thing as dangerous cot sleeping.

And to all these rod for your own back types, she was going to bed in her own room from five months (fed to sleep) and self settling from 9 months

Meant to add yy to whatever works!

Also sids is less likely to happen when co sleeping as the adults breathing helps the baby regulate theirs.
There are other risks though, namely duvets, falling out of bed, parents who drink, smoke or take medication that makes them drowsy

DS slept in his moses basket or cot. We only coslept for three nights ever, when we were on holiday.

He was EBF until 6mo and continued to BF until 20mo.

So it is perfectly possible to follow best practice.

DS was ebf til 6 months and I really didn't want to cosleep, but did do it in the end for my sanity. We also ended up attaching his cot to the bed with that side removed so I could slide him over for a feed and slide him back when he was done. For the first couple of months he fed every 2 hours through the night , then would go every 4,then woke every 2 hours again between 5and 7 months.

Now at 17 months he generally sleeps 7.30-7.30 (unless ill/teething) and we stopped bf a month ago. Fwiw, introducing solids made no difference, and neither did trying formula for a few nights (at 7 months, at MIL insistence). Cosleeping was the only thing that helped, and when he did start sleeping much better from 9 months he was quite happy to go in his own cot, contrary to MIL constantly saying he wouldn't and all that rod for your own back rubbish.

Guess I'm trying to say just do what works for you as a family, so long as its safe

I exclusively breastfed til 6 months (no bottles/formula/solids). My dd slept in her own room from 3 months. She also slept 12hr stretches for a while (didn't last unfortunately). I had a rocking chair next to her cot and fed her to sleep when she woke. Wasn't impossible. Not sure if doing it a different way would be easier or not because I only have this one experience. It worked for us.

I think you are overthinking this OP - stop fixating on "best practice" and just do what works for you.

I guess it probably sounds like that but I am really not fixated on best practice I always give it the nod and then do my own thing. My reason for this thread was I was wondering how many women who exclusively breast fed for 6 months were able to do so without ever co sleeping. I truely unreasonably thought there would be very few and so I thought offering advice to women in this country, Ireland, which is impossible to achieve was unreasonable so I am very surprised that some women were able to breastfeed and never ever co sleep for 6 months. However though maybe I am reading it wrong the majority of women do co sleep which seems to back up my case I therefore unreasonably find myself not to be unreasonable just very unclear.

Ireland has very low rates of breastfeeding, doesn't it? So health advice is probably aimed at the majority (co-sleeping is not safe if you formula feed) rather than at a small majority who exclusively breastfeed and can co-sleep safely.

Advice is similar here - safest place for the baby is in it's own cot in parent's room, but with some acceptance that if you do breastfeed and want to co-sleep then you can do it safely.

But the link you have posted doesn't say you should never bed share in the first 6 months....