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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To play music at 8.30pm?

24 replies

1985Caz · 22/03/2013 23:22

I live in the basement of a converted house. There's about five flats. Tonight I had a friend round, and from 7pm, we were listening to music. Not loud, not drunk (friend is pregnant and I had one beer with dinner).

At 8.30 the upstairs neighbour came down, bashed on the window, and when I opened the door started shouting at me about how loud it was in her flat. She didn't ask me to turn it down or give any reasons, just ranted very angrily. To give an idea of volume, friend and I were sat on separate sofas having a conversation before she knocked. I apologised and turned down the volume. At 9.30 she returned, I said I had already turned it down and started to shut the door when she started trying to force her way in! I won, shut (and bolted) the door, and turned the music off. Now I'm annoyed at having to.

AIBU?! She is late 40s and lives alone as far as I know (so no children).

OP posts:
TeamEdward · 22/03/2013 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

UniqueAndAmazing · 22/03/2013 23:25

I have 9 o'clock as cut-off.
if the neighbours had yoing children tjen probably 8:30

are you sure it ewas as quiet as yiu/think for her to return?

tigerdriverII · 22/03/2013 23:30

Well. Music from downstairs to upstairs does travel (I know because our bedroom is over our sitting room and if DH is having a music night, it does get noisy). But the times you describe, on a Friday - no she IbU.

Original poster
1985Caz · 22/03/2013 23:32

Er, yeah, I'm sure it wasn't unreasonably loud. It's a Friday, we were talking and could hear each other well, she doesn't have children. She's complained once before at 8pm on a Saturday when I was listening to Tracy Chapman with my mother.

If she'd been nice about it I would be less annoyed. I genuinely think she would have hit me if she'd got past the door.

OP posts:
kinkyfuckery · 22/03/2013 23:33

Well, it obviously was too loud, or she wouldn't have heard it, would she?

Original poster
1985Caz · 22/03/2013 23:35

If you live in a flat you have to accept hearing other people's noise. I hear her thudding around but wouldn't complain because it comes with living in a flat near other people.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 22/03/2013 23:35

I suppose you had to have been there to be able to judge this...

But it's odd that she went to all that trouble twice if it really wasn't loud.

Perhaps it was the bass?

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 22/03/2013 23:37

You shouldn't have been able to hear it if it wasn't too loud and obviously it was if she could still hear it after you turned it down.

HildaOgden · 22/03/2013 23:40

She sounds particularly grumpy,so yanbu although if it was shite music,I can't blame her

Original poster
1985Caz · 22/03/2013 23:42

Perhaps I've been unlucky with neighbours, but I wouldn't complain unless it was between 11pm-7am, or it'd been going on for hours and hours, or I had a reason (children sleeping, unwell, night shift etc). I can hear her TV and her walking around, but don't complain...

OP posts:
whois · 22/03/2013 23:45

It's Friday. It's a flat. She is being U.

No cause to complain until at least 11 and then only if its disturbing loud ie vibrating your floor rather than the distant sound of people having fun...

steppemum · 22/03/2013 23:47

It could be that the sound carries through the building in an odd way to her flat, if the building has a sort of sound funnel in the way it is constructed, eg up a closed off chimney, which acts as a funnel.
Or that the floor between you is totally uninsulated

So I wonder if you moved the stereo to the other side of the room, then it might not cause the same problem?

TBH it does sound as if she is being a bit OTT.

Original poster
1985Caz · 22/03/2013 23:57

Well, if it happens again, I'm just not going to answer. I actually thought she'd punch me if she'd got in. She can take any future complaints up with the police, who will tell her she's nuts.

OP posts:
Still18atheart · 23/03/2013 00:51

she ibu its only 8:30 on a friday for goodness sake

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/03/2013 02:11

Sorry but she tried to force her way into your place... I would have been tempted to call the non-emergency Police, well, threaten to. That's illegal.

wibblyjelly · 23/03/2013 02:21

If she complains again, offer to go to her flat, and see just how loud it is? Sound does travel, but not enough to warrant that reaction! Does she maybe work shift work, and was trying to sleep before going into work? Also may be worth keeping a note of when you do play the music, and what volume, so if she does take it forward, you have evidence to prove it wasn't that loud.

garlicbrunch · 23/03/2013 02:25

YANBU. She sounds like a loon.

MrsKeithRichards · 23/03/2013 07:04

Yanbu she's unhinged.

Original poster
1985Caz · 23/03/2013 21:51

She's gone out tonight Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
1985Caz · 23/03/2013 21:52

PS wibblyjelly she seems violent, I'm not offering to go into her flat!!!

OP posts:
wibblyjelly · 23/03/2013 22:07

Ah, fair enough! Just don't answer the door to her in future then!

RainbowsFriend · 23/03/2013 22:11

Was it the bass level that was loud maybe?

Our neighbours play music, probably not that loud - but have the bass up and it really irritates me as you just hear it over EVERYTHING else....

RainbowsFriend · 23/03/2013 22:12

However her reaction was completely OTT and Unreasonable.

Original poster
1985Caz · 23/03/2013 22:30

We had the bass at a medium level, but after her first complaint turned it to zero, so it can't have been that the second time...

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